SUBCHAPTER 833 - COUNTRY'S COOL, DISCO SUCKS

Rick Archer's Note:

This is the true story of the strangest Civil War you will ever read about.  No blood was shed, no arms were broken, but the battle was fierce nonetheless.  The battle took place on Houston's Country-Western Dance Floors in the summer of 1980.  The cause of the war was Urban Cowboy.  This movie made quite an impact on Houston, but it was not necessarily for the better.  Anyone who visited a C&W dance club following the movie's premiere would have witnessed something akin to pandemonium. 

On one side were the Disco dancers.  That was my team.  On the other side were the Country Dancers.  Thanks to Urban Cowboy, they were the new administration.  Disco had just gone down in flames thanks to the Disco traitor known as John Travolta.  Now that the Dancing Cowboy had singlehandedly eliminated every Disco club in Houston, it was the Cowboys' turn to gloat.  "Ha ha ha, those stupid Disco Dancers are being forced to visit Western citadels for the first time in their lives."   The Cowboys licked their lips with anticipation.  Welcome to your first Rodeo, City Boys!  

Gee, I could hardly wait.  Having just seen Urban Cowboy for the first time, I disliked the movie for two reasons.  One, the dancing was mediocre.  Two, the premise was complete nonsense.  The movie suggested Cowboys and Urbans, i.e. city folk, were willing to cross class lines to blend two cultures into one happy Utopia.

For example, Travolta's 'Bud' character moved fluidly from Gilley's to élan, Houston's answer to Studio 54.  In real life, no way.  Bud could not afford the expensive private membership.  He would have failed the dress code.  But most of all, no self-respecting Gilley's regular would dream of going to a Disco.  This group hated the music and disliked the people who danced to it. 

The movie was correct that many country boys had moved to Pasadena and Houston in search of jobs.  The movie was also correct that they preferred to stick to their roots.  They avoided the Discos like the plague.  As for most Houstonians, they felt a similar distaste for Gilley's and the Winchester Club.  Neither the Urbans nor the Cowboys had the slightest desire to visit the other's stronghold.  Both groups were perfectly contest to leave things just the way they were. 

Unfortunately Urban Cowboy managed to create ample bitterness on both sides.  The uproar caused by the movie on Houston's dance floors makes for a very interesting story.

Back in 1979, the movie's influence forced the Houston Discos to close and reopen as Country.  As Houston's best known Disco teacher, obviously I was bitter at seeing Disco eliminated.  I also had lots of company.  Where were the displaced Disco dancers supposed to go?  If the Disco people wished to continue dancing, we had no choice but to visit a C&W club.  Uh oh.  Once we began to visit, the sparks began to fly!  

The Cowboys were bitter too.  They were Country when Country Wasn't Cool.  They felt invaded and violated by Disco dancers flooding their floors.  But what about the displaced Disco dancers?  Trust me, the Disco crowd was just as bitter.  No one understood why this boring style of dancing had been arbitrarily imposed upon us.  No one likes to have something forced on them, especially without apparent justification. 

I was reminded of busing back in the Sixties.  The busing policy forced blacks and whites to mix against their will, a surefire recipe for conflict.  Urban Cowboy created a similar problem here in Houston, although hardly to the same extent.  That said, there was some real animosity.  Urban Cowboy turned Houston's C&W dance floors into a War Zone for a while there. 

After making fun of Disco for two years, 1978-1979, the Cowboys were appalled to see the 'Disco Sucks' people enter their clubs in 1980.  The Cowboys were hardly in a welcoming mood.  These clubs belonged to them!  They made sure their hostility was apparent by pushing, shoving, insulting, frowning, sometimes even going so far as to throw a punch.  Well, I am sorry if the Disco crowd upset the Kickers, but I guarantee the Disco crowd would never have dreamed of going to a kicker club if their preferred form of dancing had not been forcibly taken away.  The Disco people considered Western dancing a form of 'slumming'.  "No way I'm going to a dirty joint like Gilley's!'"  

Fortunately, this revulsion was anticipated by McFaddin-Kendrick which is why they created clubs like Rodeo and Cowboy well in advance of the movie debut.  I always wondered which genius had the foresight to create the exquisite Cowboy, a country palace quite acceptable to Disco snobs.  By the way, don't ask me what the Real Cowboys thought about Cowboy.  It wasn't printable.  Let's just say in their opinion Cowboy sucked almost as much as Disco did.  Cowboy was considered the domain of the Fake Cowboys. 

Although the movie suggested Pasadena kickers like Bud visited upscale discos like élan with the greatest of ease, this was a figment of the writer's imagination.  I don't recall any mass invasion of the Houston Discos by the Country crowd.  On the contrary, Kickers hated Disco music with a passion!!  Why bother wasting a night on a Disco visit when they could be out fighting in some bar over in Pasadena?

To me, the tension was rooted in class distinctions.  As the stereotype went, Disco was the preferred music of educated, elite Houston professionals while Country music was embraced by the less educated working class of Pasadena.  It was white collar versus blue collar.  Observing the initial Houston area box-office returns were surprisingly low, a Houston newspaper took a poll one month after the Urban Cowboy premiere.  The newspaper was trying to figure out why local Houston and Pasadena teenagers were not flocking to see the film.  The major complaint from the kids was they did not have a clue what the word 'Urban' meant.  When that inflammatory statement appeared in the paper, the smug Disco crowd felt vindicated.  What a bunch of hicks!  Did they ever think of looking in a Hick-tionary?  Oh, too bad, they didn't own one, did they?

Personally, I thought the hiring of John Travolta was to blame.  He was a polarizing figure from the start.  Travolta was seen by country folk as Disco disguised as Country.  He was a Fake Cowboy attempting to cash in.  His movie was a money grab. 

Houston's cultural rift began when filming commenced in the spring of 1979.  Newspaper and TV reporters simply could not get over the fact that John Travolta, the hottest actor on the planet, was filming a movie nearby.  But get this... Travolta refused to live in Pasadena.  Instead he found a Houston mansion to rent.  Travolta claimed to love being a Cowboy, but everyone knew who's side he was really on. 

The Houston reporters were locked in perpetual tizzy.  For weeks on end, I could not open the morning paper without some breathless reference to 'John' in the Gossip Column.  Nor did it stop with the newspapers.  Nary an evening went by without some breathless mention of a Travolta sighting on each TV channel.  Travolta was worse than Waldo... he was everywhere!  But what people failed to realize was that all this hype was being spat upon by Houston area Cowboys.  They hated him!

Although national box office benefitted greatly from Travolta's appearance, local box office would have done much better if Patrick Swayze had played the lead.  Many True Blue Cowboys boycotted the movie strictly due to Travolta's presence. 

Indeed, local Kickers directed all kinds of disgust at 'Ravolta', the pretty boy symbol of the hated Disco crowd.  The very thought that smug, conceited John Ravolta, the Disco King himself, had been chosen to play the role of the Dancing Cowboy made country people sick to their stomach.

Prior to John, Houston and Pasadena got along just fine.  Let sleeping dogs lie.  Throughout the Seventies, Gilley's wasn't bothering anyone in Houston.  Now thanks to John, there was intense curiosity about the movie being filmed in neighboring Pasadena.  First the first time, Houstonians paid attention to Gilley's.  Starting when the movie was being filmed in mid-1979, many Houstonians made the necessary pilgrimage to Gilley's to see what the fuss was all about.  This was the first-ever visit for most Houston people.  They all came back shaking their heads in disgust.  They could not believe what they had seen!  Gilley's was hand's down the ugliest, filthiest place they had ever visited in their life.  Nor did it help that the beer-belching regulars were gross and hostile.  My friends were confused. No one could understand what the big to-do was about.  Why are they making a movie about this ugly redneck citadel?

No argument from me.  I was just as confused as everyone else.  After I accompanied my friend Joanne to her beloved Cactus Club, I ran from the place screaming.  My trip to Gilley's left me equally depressed.  I spent all of 1979 wondering who on earth decided Western dancing at Gilley's would make a nice Sequel to Saturday Night Fever.  Now that I had actually seen Gilley's, the idea was even more preposterous.  Seeing the movie was even more painful.  This was the worst 'Sequel' I had ever seen!  In my opinion, the movie was dishonest.  Someone had hoodwinked the citizens of Houston.  Country may indeed be Cool, but the only side we were seeing was ugly. 

And how do you suppose the Gilley's patrons felt about Houstonians thumbing their collective nose at the Pride of Pasadena?  There was a lot of anger on both sides.  And take a guess where that anger manifested itself?  Houston's C&W dance floors. 

SUBCHAPTER 834 - COLLISION OF TWO WORLDS

By my estimate, Urban Cowboy created two awkward years of class warfare here in Houston.  The movie suggested that Urbans, college-educated Houston professionals, and Cowboys, blue collar Pasadena factory workers, were ready to erase class distinctions.  Ridiculous.  Instead the movie created the exact opposite situation by bringing ancient prejudices out in the open.  I suppose there has been underlying hostility and distrust between city people and country people dating back to the days of the settlers.  If there is any doubt, go see Deliverance again.  In that movie, the revulsion city slickers feel for hillbillies is matched stride for stride by the hostility country folk feel for smug, uppity, know-it-all city boys. 

Here in Texas, for the past century, country people have been subjected to ridicule as rubes, hicks and rednecks.  Not only do many city people despise country music, they make fun of country dancing as well.  Give monkeys enough alcohol and watch them hop around the same way kickers do. 

No one likes being made fun of, so people raised in the country understandably carried a large chip on their shoulder.  Here in the Greater Houston area, the mutual hostility was kept under wraps using a simple solution... everybody stayed in their own backyard.  However, that was about to change.  John Travolta was coming to town carrying Pandora's Box under his arm.

By closing all the Houston Discos and turning them into Country dance halls, the country people suddenly had the upper hand.  Since they had grown up dancing country, in their mind, Country dance halls were their personal property.  You Disco dancers are not welcome!  Go home!

Go home to where?  The Disco dancers had no homes!  The 1979 'Western Transformation' of had erased the Disco playgrounds in Houston.  In so doing, the loss of their habitat unleashed a tremendous amount of underlying resentment in the Disco circles.  Now that all the Discos had closed, pretty much against their will any Disco boy and girl who wanted to keep dancing was forced to invade the Western dance clubs. 

A huge C&W backlash ensued.  The Country crowd delighted in taking revenge on the hated city slickers who had spent their whole lives making fun of country people.  Acting ugly towards the 'Disco Sucks' newcomers was justified by a century of disrespect by the city crowd. However, this bitterness was hardly a one-way street.  I was bitter and so were my Disco friends.  Urban Cowboy had cost us our Disco lifestyle.  Thanks to Urban Cowboy, Disco was dead and Country-Western was being shoved down our throats.  Furthermore, the very people the movie had glorified were behaving like asses.  Now we knew why we didn't like these Gilley's type people to begin with. 

Now that the forced migration had created the Collision of Two Worlds, Houston would be permanently changed in a very unusual way.

SUBCHAPTER 835 - COUNTRY WHEN COUNTRY WASN'T COOL

I Was Country When Country Wasn't Cool
    -- Barbara Mandrell

I remember wearin' straight leg Levis
Flannel shirts Even when they weren't in style
I remember singin' with Roy Rogers
at the movies when the West was really wild

And I was listenin' to the Opry
When all of my friends
were diggin' Rock 'n Roll and Rhythm & Blues
I was Country, when Country wasn't cool

I remember circlin' the drive-in,
pullin' up and turnin' down George Jones
I remember when no one was lookin'
I was puttin' peanuts in my Coke

I took a lot of kiddin'
'Cause I never did fit in
now look at everybody
tryin' to be what I was then

I was Country, when Country wasn't cool
 

By bringing Cowboys and Urbans into direct contact, Urban Cowboy had flipped the social order upside down here in Houston.  This was a form of 'Forced Integration'.  They didn't like us and we didn't like them.  To me, the prejudice was apparent from the start.  How could I forget the rudeness that caused Country dancers to knock down my students Devin and Mona simply because they were dancing the wrong kind of Waltz at the Winchester Club?  That was my first clue that things weren't right.

Throughout the summer of 1980, the centuries-old 'city versus country' tension was played out on C&W dance floors.  Certain misguided people engaged in silly turf warfare.  One night some guy called me a 'Stupid Disco Duck'.  He didn't like seeing me dance Disco.  Why were these people so darn mad at us?  I began to give serious thought to the Kicker rally cry 'I was Country before Country was Cool'.  I knew what I was upset about.  This damn movie had killed Disco in Houston two years before it died a natural death in other parts of the country. 

But what exactly were the country people objecting to?  I identified five areas of tension... Travolta, Fake Kicker Clubs, Music, Fashion, and I'll let you guess the fifth.  As I pointed out, the first argument started with John Travolta.  The Houston-area Country Crowd was upset over the inclusion of Disco John in Western stripes as their unwanted hero. 

Then the Real Cowboys got mad because Houston nightclubs created bastardized copies of Gilley's with fake Kicker joints like Cowboy.  They were especially angry that Cowboy had the nerve to play Disco music.  The outrage continued to build when Willie and Waylon were snubbed on the Urban Cowboy soundtrack.  The old-timers were mad!  This new 'Eagles' sound was interpreted by old-timers as more suitable for Yuppie newcomers to the scene.  Damn it, the Outlaw Sound was vaporized against their will and replaced by soothing ballads!

Previously I discussed how Urban Cowboy producer Irving Azoff deliberately replaced Old-Style Country Music with Eagles-style music in an attempt to appeal to a wider audience.  While Azoff was certainly within his rights to do so, I think this bold move is what gave rise to the "I was Country when Country wasn't Cool" battle cry. 

With justification, the Real Cowboys felt like Hollywood was thumbing its nose.  They blamed the Disco crowd for Hollywood's decision to change the music from 'Real Country' to 'Country Fake'.  Country people detested the Urban Cowboy soundtrack because traditional music had been ditched in order to promote rhythms more suited to the tender ears of 'Disco Ducks'.   

Country people held dear to their beliefs.  They believed in trucks, guns, rodeos and country music.  Hank Williams, Merle Haggard, Johnny Cash, Willie and Waylon were their heroes.  Now they were being shoved aside for the Eagles and other California pop artists.  What the hell is going on here?  Some idiot Disco person must have put this soundtrack together.  Whatever happened to angry music?  Whatever happened to done me wrong songs?   The rapid transition caused a lot of hard feelings and I could see their point.  I was angry when I lost my beloved Disco music.  Now the old-timers were angry because they were losing their Outlaw music. 

Are you starting the get picture?  Urban Cowboy stirred up a hornet's nest of trouble.  The Discos were angry over the loss of their lifestyle and the Cowboys were angry over the corruption of their music and the loss of their dance club privacy.  Is anybody happy here?  In a manner similar to racial tension, we didn't know exactly who we were mad at, but we were all looking for someone to take our frustrations out on.  Due to all this hostility, Houston's Country-Western dance clubs turned into a War Zone.

SUBCHAPTER 836 - COUNTRY-WESTERN FASHION WARS

The Real Cowboys had to deal with another insult, the  unexpected arrival of outrageous Western fashions.  With good reason, this strange development rubbed a lot of people raw. 

Although I hardly consider myself an expert, after years of watching TV shows like Bonanza and Wagon Train, it was my impression that Western clothing had not changed much since the days of Roy Rogers and Dale Evans.  Well, those days were over.  Thanks to Urban Cowboy, something crazy was going on.

Tasseled shirts, sequined vests, expensive boots, fancy hats, turquoise necklaces, matching earrings, spiffy belts, skirts with Navajo designs.  As the Fashion Industry championed these outfits as the new normal, there were Yuppie women who put garish over taste.  They didn't just tiptoe across the line with their elitist snobbery, they demolished it. 

I could definitely understand why a person raised in the country would feel disrespected.  These gaudy new fashions were an insult because they implied country girls were not attractive wearing the clothes they were comfortable with.

Country people believe in being down to earth.  This ethic includes dressing humble and not worrying about hair, jewelry and fingernail polish.  Country folk are hard-working people who wear practical clothing.  With good reason, they asked what exactly was wrong with wearing blue jeans and denim. 

Based on the success of Saturday Night Fever, once Travolta committed to the new movie, it probably didn't take much to convince the fashion people in New York's Garment District to jump on board.  Saturday Night Fever had been a surprise hit to everyone involved, but the success of Urban Cowboy seemed guaranteed.  Hyped as the 'Sequel' to the box office Disco monster, this movie felt like a surefire investment.  Consequently the marketing wheels were set in motion full speed ahead.  The Urban Cowboy fashion project shaped up as a gold mine certain to pay off in a big way.  But it was also an insult because these new western fashions had nothing to do with the far less glamorous country people portrayed in the movie. 

The Country people immediately blamed the Disco people for this abomination.  And why was that?   Because John Travolta was being linked to these ridiculous western clothes.  Since we were being told that Urban Cowboy was a 'Sequel', everybody jumped to the conclusion that the same people who marketed Disco fashions were trying to make a similar killing on Western clothes.  Disconcerting messages were being sent.  This was a movie about people from the country, but they got a city boy to play the lead, they used city music, and they marketed preposterous clothing to city people.  Country folk did not need a college degree to see the insincerity.  It was increasingly obvious this movie was targeting City people as its desired audience, not Country people.  Travolta was fake.  Cowboy was fake.  The music was fake.  And this ridiculous clothing was fake. 

The dramatic change in women's fashion had everyone startled.  Clothes like these had never graced the planet before.  Where had this unusual trend come from?  Personally, I suspected the hidden hand of some Madison Avenue genius.  Someone wizard operating with inside knowledge had orchestrated this unexpected wave of Western designs long before anyone knew Urban Cowboy was in the works. 

Speaking for myself, I liked some of the Western fashions that popped up in Houston during the Urban Cowboy Era.  On a beautiful woman, these combinations were very attractive.  However, there is a right place and a wrong place.  These alien outfits were a direct insult to the country crowd, so wearing them to the Western clubs was certain to invite resentment from the traditionalists.  But that sentiment was lost on Houston's Fashionistas.

The former Disco Divas decided to cause trouble.  Now that Houston's Disco clubs had been turned into Western clubs, many displaced Disco dancers were among those flocking to the Western clubs.  Overnight the western dance floors were visited by droves of former Disco dancers who had no other place to go if they wanted to keep dancing.  Disco Dancing was known for its outrageous outfits.  And yes, the Divas loved the Night Life.  Even better, no one objected to the crazy clothing. 

Western clubs were different.  They had a tradition in place.  When in Rome, dress as the Romans do.  That means show respect for how Real Cowgirls dress, you know, keep it modest.  Our Glitter Girls disagreed.  They figured if they could wear anything they wanted to the Disco, they could do the same thing at the Kicker clubs.  And so they did, wearing outfits more suited for Halloween or Hollywood than venues which catered to hard working, down to earth people with dirt under their fingernails and calluses on their hands. 

Truth be told, only a few women had the nerve to flaunt their wealth and so-called social superiority.  The majority of Disco women kept it under control and made a modest adjustment to designer jeans such as Gloria Vanderbilt.  I think the Real Cowgirls could have lived with this.  If the Disco ladies had made an effort to blend in, there would have been no problem.  It was the gaudy 'Western chic' fashions that got everyone worked into a tizzy.  The old saying suggests that one bad apple spoils the barrel.  These ridiculous fashion displays gave the Country people reason to think the Disco crowd was showing disrespect.  And they were right!  In my opinion, the decision to wear these over-the-top Western outfits to a Kicker club constituted a deliberate act of snobbery.

The word 'pretentious' doesn't even begin to describe it.  Spending fortunes on Western clothing and accessories, the former Glitter Girls showed up in the Western clubs wearing outrageous outfits that had nothing to do with milking cows or dodging mud.  To Real Country people, the clothing issue was all about rich people making pointless fashion statements at their expense.  The message was that wealthy Disco Urbanites were acting superior to less affluent, wrong side of the track Country folk. 

In addition to the disrespect, there was a second problem, maybe even more insidious.  Dare I say that some of the new outfits looked good on the Disco women?  Let me put this delicately.  When done tastefully, some of these modern outfits looked good, too good.  Once the Cowgirls saw their boyfriends discretely checking out the stylish Disco women invading their turf, they resented the newcomers even more.  The Real Cowgirls were furious because they were getting out-spent by good-looking, well-dressed women.  No one likes to be shown up, especially in their own backyard. 

Any woman who entered a club wearing flashy western fashion attire inevitably stirred up a hornet's nest of anger.  This was Class Warfare!  Who let these vermin in??   The Cowgirls did not appreciate being shoved in a corner by uppity outsiders from the privileged side of the tracks.  They were pissed off and made damn sure their men knew about it.  These Disco frauds need to be put their place!!

Now the Cowboys were angry because their girlfriends were driving them crazy.  Nothing... I repeat... NOTHING irritated the Real Cowboys more than the thought that Disco people were trying to show them up.  This whole thing had a rotten Disco smell about it.  The final insult was the unnecessary fashion invasion which favored the Disco women.  Country people felt these rich bitches were deliberately thumbing their noses.  Where do these uppity Disco people get their nerve?  

A trip to the Western clubs during the Summer of 1980 was fascinating for all kinds of reasons.  I could see the Real Cowboys were seriously offended by the drastic changes and I didn't blame them one bit.  The change in music and this fashion makeover were obviously deliberate.  Someone on Madison Avenue was dictating what country people should listen to and how they should dress.  Even though I was new to the Western scene, I could tell Urban Cowboy had changed the landscape forever.  So there you have it.  The Real Cowboys were pissed off over Travolta, the disappearance of their Outlaw Music, the invasion of the Disco crowd, and the rude women with their lavish outfits.   And, believe it or not, another humiliation was on its way.  The Texas Aggies were taking over!!

SUBCHAPTER 837 - THE AGGIES STEAL THE SHOW

Following the Urban Cowboy premiere in June, there a lot of people who consistently bumped into each other on Houston dance floors.  There were the Real Cowboy old-timers who had learned to dance in the country.  There were Real Cowboys who grew up in the city and had never danced country in their life.  There were Disco dancers and there were the City Slickers who had never danced country in their life.  This group included professionals such as doctors, lawyers, and businessmen.  

And then there were the Texas Aggies.  They were far and away the best dancers.  And nobody liked them.  That said, they played a key role in our story. 

Here in Texas, the Aggies of Texas A&M and the University of Texas Longhorns had been bitter rivals for generations.  The University of Texas invited preppies, high school valedictorians and well-off suburban kids to their campus.  A&M was the destination of choice for veterinarians and Future Farmers of America.  But that simplifies things too much.  Texas A&M also provided a terrific education in many fields such as architecture, engineering and petroleum exploration. 

The Aggies irritated many country people because they were they were 'trained' farmers with a fancy education.  The Aggies irritated many city people because they were just as good at their white collar jobs as the rest.  But here is the rub.  Although A&M graduates had just as good an education as everyone else, for some reason they had been chosen as objects for state-wide derision and disrespect.  And what reason was that?  Many people point fingers at the University of Texas.  By and large the Longhorns had the Old Money and wanted to keep the country boys in their place.  Whatever the motives, these two institutions stood as enduring state-wide symbols of country versus city.  And guess what?  They didn't like each other. 

Many blame the Longhorns for popularizing the Aggie Joke as a way to put down their hated rivals.  How did the Aggie freshman die from drinking milk?  The cow fell on him.  Two Aggie football players were walking in the woods.  One of them said, "Look, a dead bird."  The other looked up in the sky and said, "Where?"

In general, attitudes towards A&M have improved over the years.  However, back in the 70's and early 80's, the Texas Aggies were definitely unpopular.  For some strange reason, graduates of other Texas colleges seemed to side with the Longhorns.  The Aggies had no allies.  At the heart of the problem, they were part-city, part-country.  Since the Aggies straddled two worlds, they were often caught in the middle.  Blue collar city people and less privileged country folk disliked the Aggies because they were educated, wealthy, and perceived to act like they were better.  The Yuppie crowd disliked the Aggies because, well, uh, they came from the country and still had dirt under their untrimmed fingernails. 

It did not matter that Aggies were just as educated and just as smart as the Longhorns.  There must be something wrong with them.  Sorry to say, but there are some people who always need someone to hate.  If it isn't the Jews, Arabs or Asians, let's try the Blacks, Mexicans, and the poor.  In the eyes of narrow-minded bigots, the Aggies would always be second class citizens because they came from the country.  As if that made a bit of sense.  Unenlightened prejudice is very difficult to understand or tolerate.  

As Mark Twain once said about bigotry, people are easily fooled into believing certain things, but it takes an Act of God to help them realize they had been fooled in the first place.  People's minds tend to be a one-way street.  Once an attitude gets stuck in someone's mind, even it is wrong, it is very difficult to persuade a person to challenge those thoughts. 

After a century of being besieged by Aggie Jokes and thinly-disguised hostility, many A&M graduates understandably felt bitter.  It is human nature to crave respect and it also human nature to fight back when that respect is denied.  I imagine over time many Aggies developed a touchy, defensive attitude that called for them to lash out.  By overreacting in certain situations, the Aggies inadvertently served to reinforce the negative attitude held by many. 

Over time, the Aggie stereotype as the Country Bumpkin became difficult for A&M graduates to dispel.  There are those who claimed the Aggies brought it on themselves because they had a chip on their shoulder.  Maybe so, but if people had shown them the respect they deserved in the first place, the problem would have never developed.  During the Urban Cowboy era, I think there were times when the Aggies felt like the only people who accepted them were fellow Aggies.  This explains why they tended to stick to themselves.  So naturally everyone accused them of being aloof and elitist.  Sometimes you just can't win.

For purposes of our story, it is important to understand that Texas A&M has long possessed a rich country dance tradition.  Even before I saw the Aggies dominate the Urban Cowboy dance floors, I had two experiences which confirmed Texas A&M was a hotbed of dancing.

Back in March 1978, I was struggling to learn how to partner dance to Disco music.  I had never partner danced in my life and I had no teacher to show me the ropes.  Hanging out at the Pistachio Club one night, a pretty Aggie coed named Janie recognized me from a Disco class she had attended.  Janie had a non-dancer boyfriend named Alex who lived in Houston.  Janie had learned to dance up at A&M and really wanted Alex to catch on so they could go dancing together.  On a visit to Houston, Janie had come to my class to see what he was learning.  She liked my class and encouraged Alex to stick with it.  As it turned out, Alex did stay with the lessons.  In fact, Janie was waiting for Alex to show up when she noticed me over at the railing as I watched people dance. 

Hoping to get a dance, Janie came over to strike up a conversation.  Noticing my intense concentration on a couple who was partner dancing, Janie asked, "Do you like to partner dance?"

With a rueful smile, I confessed.  "I am not much of a partner dancer, Janie.  I know one lousy step and that's it."

Janie laughed.  "Well, at least you know something.  Show me your move!"

So I picked up her hands and led my go-to move, something I called the Pistachio Step.

Janie squealed with delight. "Hey, I know that move!  That's the Aggie Jitterbug!"

Curious, I asked Janie to show me what she was talking about.  Janie took me in a corner and ran me through the four most important moves in the Aggie Jitterbug.  I was beyond grateful.  Thanks to Janie, I patterned my Disco partner dance system after her Aggie Jitterbug moves.  When I say Janie and her Aggie Jitterbug saved my dance career, I am completely serious. 

Two years later, lightning struck again when an A&M graduate taught my friend Joanne how the Texas Twostep worked.  In so doing, he whispered the Four Magic Words, Slow Slow Quick Quick.  Grateful for the explanation, Joanne asked the young man how he had learned to dance so well. 

With obvious pride, the young man replied, "I'm a member of the Aggie Wranglers.  That's a dance organization we have up at A&M.  We make up all sorts of country moves and teach classes to new students.  We get a lot of students from the Houston area who have never danced in their lives.  We teach the newcomers how to country dance so they can participate in our school dances.  You would be surprised at popular our dances are.  That's how I meet all my girlfriends!"

As one can gather, I will always be in great debt to Texas A&M because the school's dance tradition came to my rescue twice.  Forced to learn Disco Partner Dancing and Country-Western Partner Dancing using the Braille method, these breakthroughs allowed me to overcome difficult obstacles. 

Thank you, Texas A&M.

SUBCHAPTER 838 - CHANGE

It is my observation that Western dancing in Houston developed in four phases.  Phase I was the Old-Style dancing which had been around since the days of saloons and barn dancing.  Phase II was an offshoot of the disruption caused by the filming of Urban Cowboy.

To illustrate my point, let me share an odd story.  Nancy was one of the girls in the TGIS Seekers Club I had my eye on before Victoria's reemergence ruined everything.  Nancy probably had her eye on me too.  During the group trip to Gilley's in May, we danced together.  Afterwards Nancy asked me for a favor.  Her parents wanted her to attend an event down in Cuero, Texas, her hometown.  Apparently a family member was being honored for some reason.

"Rick, a lot of my friends from high school are going to be at that dance with their families.  I really want to show off these dance moves you have taught us.  Would you mind going down there with me?  It's not that far.  We can drive back the same night."

Ordinarily I would have said no, but I was interested in this young lady.  And I was lonely.  Nor did I have a thing to do on this coming Saturday night.  Since Victoria rarely checked on me, I figured why not.  So we drove to Cuero.  Cuero is a small rural community located roughly halfway between Houston and San Antonio.  I met Nancy's parents and her brother Jeff at the local VFW Legion hall.  I figure there were a couple hundred people at the event.  After dinner and a ceremony of some sort, the band took the stage and began to play a fast Polka.  The idea behind the fast Polka was to discourage anyone from dancing while the band warmed up. 

Nancy grabbed me.  This was her big chance to show off before everyone else got out there.  "C'mon, Rick, let's show them what we can do!"

I did my best.  I circled turned Nancy one way, I circled turned her the other way, I did Zigzags, Sweetheart Promenades, Conversations, Side Travel, everything I knew.  Then for the big finale, I did continuous Circle Turns in a giant circle all the way around the dance floor, 20 revolutions in a row.  It was a fast Polka and most people would get dizzy, but not us.  Nancy's long hair was flying in the wind and her short dress elevated to reveal her lovely legs.  As we passed her friends, Nancy smiled and waved to her friends.  They waved back.   We were good, very good.

As I walked Nancy back to our table, I noticed the entire room was frowning at us.  Their arms were crossed, their expressions were hostile, and they stared darts at us as they whispered to each other.  Some of them looked ready to spit if we passed close enough.

"Good grief," I thought to myself, "what is this all about?"  After we sat down, people continued to stare at us.  One man even pointed at me.  That's when I knew for sure I had done something wrong, but what?  Confused, I turned to Jeff, Nancy's brother. 

"Jeff, these people look really upset about something.  What did I do wrong?"

Jeff said nothing.  He looked around the room and studied the faces.  After a pause, he nodded a bit.  Speaking in his deep southern drawl, Jeff replied, "Well, Rick, it's like this.  These men have been pushing their wives backwards in this neck of the woods for the past hundred years.  Now you come in here with all this bullshit city dancing.  I don't think the men appreciate that very much.  That puts bad ideas in their women's heads about the way things oughta be on the dance floor.  Our men like their dancing just the way it is."

Then Jeff stared at me for a moment.  This emphasis suggested Jeff didn't approve either.  Not only that, he was giving me a warning to watch my step.  I got the message.  For the rest of the night, Nancy danced backwards.  She danced backwards to Polka.  She danced backwards to Twostep.  She danced backwards to Waltz.  And she wasn't very happy about it.  In fact, Nancy protested rather strongly. 

"Rick, why aren't you turning me or letting me go forwards?  This going backwards is really boring!  What's wrong with you?  Do some of your fancy moves!"

I explained what her brother had said to me, but Nancy disagreed.  "Oh, bullshit, Jeff doesn't know what he's talking about.  My girlfriends like it, didn't you see them waving at us as we danced?  Come on, let's do those circle turns again.  That was fun!"

I frowned.  This woman was trying to get me killed. 

"Nancy, do you mind easing up?  I'm just trying to get out of here without a couple of yahoos taking me out back and punching me in the stomach."

"Oh, for crying out loud, don't be such a sissy.  Stop being so intimidated and show everyone what we can do."

I didn't appreciate Nancy's comments one bit.  When she repeated them later on, I said it was time to go.  Based on the looks on those men's faces, I did the right thing.  Basically, that was the night the Old-Style Western dancing met the New-Style Western dancing.  The hostility I experienced was the perfect example of some of the anger brought on by Urban Cowboy in the year prior to its debut.  There are a lot of people in this world who do not like change. 

SUBCHAPTER 839 - THE OPENING OF COWBOY

Phase Two began in February 1979 when Cowboy opened in Houston.  This unusual club was an expensive experiment to see if Houston professionals could be enticed to try Country-Western dancing.  Situated in the Galleria, no one had ever heard of putting an attractive Western club in the high rent part of town.  Plus the owners knew damn well Houston professionals had no idea how to Western dance.  It was a high-stakes gamble.

The results were a mixed bag.  Yes, Houston area professionals were very drawn to this new style of music and the plush surroundings.  Wealthy, successful business executives flocked to the place to chase well-heeled, attractive professional women looking to meet their male counterparts.  In a flash, Cowboy became élan with boots on which was the idea all along.  Cowboy was popular right from the start with Houston's affluent singles.

However there was one very curious development.  While the Longhorns sat at the bar plying desirable women with drinks and witty lines in pursuit of affection, the Aggies took their women out on the dance floor.  The Longhorns stared in consternation.  What on earth is going on here??  Look at all the attention these damn Aggies are getting!

Like any underdog, the Aggies had long yearned for the chance to prove they were just as good as anyone else.  Seemingly out of nowhere, the Aggies had just gotten the break they hoped for.  They were the only professionals who had the slightest idea how to dance to this music.  The world had just turned upside down.  The Longhorns were forced to twiddle their thumbs while the Aggies enjoyed their Day in the Sun. 

The A&M graduates had found a place where they could really shine... the dance floors.  Starting with the opening of Cowboy, Houston area A&M graduates dominated the western floors for an entire year.  In so doing, their Phase II innovations created the New Style.  And did they garner the respect they craved?  Probably to some extent, but they were also resented for their obvious superiority.  Sometimes you just can't win. 

Phase II lasted from Cowboy's February 1979 opening of till the film debut in June 1980.  Sixteen months.  The surprising success of Cowboy, Houston's first upscale western club, is what caused all the Discos to disappear.  Once Houston club owners saw the experiment pay off in a big way, they moved to copy the Cowboy format lest they be left behind when the movie hit the screens.  During this time, two dozen Houston Discos closed and reopened a month or so later as a Western club. 

Prior to Urban Cowboy, Western dancing had never been popular inside Houston city limits.  You want to kicker dance?  Go to Pasadena.  Or go to some fringe joint on the edge of Houston.  Then one day the Dancing Cowboy came to town.  After the success of Cowboy had opened eyes, Travolta's presence during the filming galvanized the startling Disco-to-Western Transformation.  Now that Cowboy and Travolta had erased Disco from the map, Western dance became the only game in town.  Now it was just a question of waiting for the movie to finally hit the silver screen.

This Phase II period witnessed a year's worth of anticipation about 'Western Dancing' before the movie was even released.  One TV anchorwoman after another boldly asserted, "This movie is a dance sequel to Saturday Night Fever.  I am certain John Travolta is going to bring western dancing to Houston in a big way!" 

Actually Western dancing was already here, but it was tepid.  Only the Aggies were having any fun.  Since the city boys had no idea how to Western dance, they were forced to watch.  I know it sounds absurd, but for an entire year, the Aggies had every floor in Houston pretty much to themselves.  Nevertheless interest was building during this time.  With Travolta featured nightly on local news channels, the expectation was set for Houston citizens to embrace Western dancing in a big way once the movie finally appeared in June 1980. 

Now here is what is odd.  The Houston Media predicted the dancing would improve thanks to the Dancing Cowboy.  And yes it did, the dancing definitely did improve, but it improved Before the movie appeared, not After.  That, my friends, is weird.  Trends are supposed to follow the movie. 

For example, prior to the movie Risky Business, sales of iconic Wayfarer sunglasses were so low Ray-Ban was about to discontinue the line.  That was before Tom Cruise said, "Sometimes you just gotta to say 'What the F...!'" as he donned his sunglasses.  Ray Ban sales shot up 50%.  That is how it is supposed to work.  Fads and Trends are supposed to come After a hit movie appears. 

Be that as it may, during the year Before the Urban Cowboy debut, thanks to the strange combination of John Travolta, Cowboy, and the Texas Aggies, the Old Style of Western dancing was replaced by the New Style of Western dancing.  This was a good thing, but it also backfired in a truly bizarre way.  Following the release of Urban Cowboy, the Aggie Joyride was instantly extinguished.  Can anyone guess why?? 

SUBCHAPTER 840 - THE URBAN COWBOY MOVIE DEBUT

June 5, 1980.  Oh my God, here it is, the Big Debut is finally here!!

For an entire year Houston had been bombarded with breathless promises that Western dancing was THE NEXT BIG THING.  Indeed, during Phase II these confident promises had turned into a self-fulfilling prophecy.  With a year to kill prior to the Debut, thanks to the Aggies, the Western dancing had already improved dramatically.  In fact, it had improved so much that the nightly dancing at Cowboy was now SUPERIOR to the dancing at Gilley's as seen in the movie.  How weird is that?  From my perspective, everything about Urban Cowboy was weird.  And things were about to get more weird. 

During Phase II, Houston pretty much resisted the siren call to participate in the dancing.  Most people stayed on the sidelines due to the lack of western teachers.  For the five months of 1980 leading up to the Debut, my western classes were pretty much the only game in town.  There may have been Western classes in other parts of Houston in the first half on 1980, but I never heard a word about a single competitor.  Without teachers, there was nowhere to learn.  Except for students taking my classes and of course the Aggies, most people decided to wait for the Debut.  That is when they would make their move.

Here is where things get interesting.  I don't know this for sure, but instinct tells me that somewhere around this time a rumor started that Country-Western dancing was not difficult to learn.  In fact, the rumor was true.  Old-Style Country-Western where women danced backwards all night long was a piece of cake.  Reassured they could pick it up in no time at all, most people decided there was no hurry. However, there was a catch to the rumor no one knew about.  Unaware of the impending disaster, the grasshoppers played their fiddles and bided their time.  While the ants prepared in my classes, the grasshoppers would get to the dancing when the time was right.  

The Premiere of Urban Cowboy was the moment we had all been waiting for.  The only way to comprehend the Houston Zeitgeist is to grasp the utter magnitude of Urban Cowboy coming to Houston.  This was no ordinary event, this was celestial.  Every important Houston celebrity came out for the occasion.  But wait, there was more! 

Celebrities from all over the country came flying in for the event.  Hollywood was well represented with moguls like Barry Diller and Irving Azoff.  New York showed up as well.  I guess things had been a bit slow at Studio 54 lately.  Considered the epicenter of the Disco Scene, New York's Studio 54 was home to the best and beautiful.  Momentarily distracted from the throbbing Disco pulse, several 54 regulars took time to make the scene in Houston... Andy Warhol, Diane von Furstenberg, Jerry Hall, and more.

Oh my God, the most important people in the WORLD are paying attention to Houston! 

So how did ordinary citizens handle all this fuss?  Not very well.  In my opinion, we behaved like pre-programmed lemmings.  In one grand surge, all those people who had been waiting waiting waiting rushed to Houston's country-western dance floors.  The dance clubs had been waiting too.  They had been hanging around at half capacity for an entire year just for this moment.  Now their patience was finally being rewarded.  This is what Disco had died for, Houston's big Country-Western Payday. 

Texas Pride.  Houston Pride.  Civic Duty.  For an entire year, the endless hoopla surrounding the movie had challenged every person in Houston to get out on the Western dance floor.  Now all these celebrities had arrived in Houston to reinforce the same message... 'Hey, Houston!  Get out there and show us what you've got!' 

I guess it all went to our heads.  Noting this weird 'Dance Sequel' had portrayed Houston as some sort of Country-Western Dance Capital, you know, 'Saturday Night Fever, Texas-style', we all felt it was our duty to get out there and dance.  In a flash, with the national media watching, Houston was hit with Country-Western Fever!

Only one problem.  To the supreme embarrassment of all the good people of Houston, we suddenly discovered none of us knew what we were doing.  You think I'm kidding, but I'm not.  There were only two groups of people who could western dance... the A&M graduates and a smattering of blue collar people who had moved from the country to Houston in search of jobs.  However, the blue collar arrivals avoided the upscale kicker clubs, preferring to stick to rough and ready places like the Winchester Club.  So that left the Aggies as the only people living on the fancy west side of Houston who knew how to dance.  And were they happy?  No!!  And why not?  Because this giant surge of humanity had utterly ruined their playgrounds just as they were about to show off. 

SUBCHAPTER 841 - COSMIC JOKE NUMBER ONE

Following the Debut, Houston's upscale western clubs saw their dance floors mobbed with a legion of new dancers who had no idea what they were doing.  In the process, these newcomers ruined everything for the small contingent of people who actually could dance.  The Aggies watched in horror as their playgrounds were sabotaged by a bunch of idiots.  The Aggies were not pleased, not pleased at all.  The dance floors were packed wall to wall.   Everyone was so confused and the floor was so crowded that no one could move.  The fact that everyone was forced to dance in place probably saved lives.  Otherwise all the bad dancers might have killed someone.  People shuffled around the floor at inches per minute.  Houston was famous for clogging freeways whenever a hurricane threatened, but Hurricane Country-Western was even worse.  The floor was total gridlock.  And now people were getting frustrated.  And angry.  There were collisions.  There were arguments.  There were insults and ugly words.  All I could do was shake my head in wonderment. 

"Oh my God," I thought, "the dance floor has become a War Zone!"

The whole thing was preposterous.  Here we had a movie that told the world our Houston area was this amazing Western dance paradise, but in reality nobody knew a damn thing.  The funny part is that this situation was totally unanticipated.  Aided and abetted by gushing TV personalities paid to plug Urban Cowboy at every turn, Hollywood had played a giant practical joke on our hometown.  Everyone thought lots of people knew how to Western dance, but nothing could be further from the truth.  This was the moment people realized for the first time that Houston had zero Western dance tradition to speak of.  Thanks to all the John Travolta hype, Houston citizens had been conned into thinking we deserved credit for something we had no business receiving applause.  That was Cosmic Joke Number One.

This is just speculation on my part, but my guess is that maybe 2% of Houston's population had ever danced Western in their life.  In fact, that might be an overstatement.  We lived in the city.  There was at best little interest in western dancing.  Because there was no interest, there were no western dance teachers.  There were no western dance studios.  High school dances played Disco music and Motown.  Houston singles went Disco dancing.  It wasn't like there was any dislike of Western dancing, but rather us city slickers had no idea Western dancing even existed!  And now this Western Storm had hit our hometown and we were totally unprepared. 

With all these rookies Two Stepping without a license, my friends asked me why hadn't this gridlock happened before the movie came out.  I replied that people had been visiting the Western clubs all along during Phase II, but they had the sense not to get there because they didn't know what they were doing.  So they wisely sipped their beers at the bar and watched the Aggies show them how it was done. 

However, once the movie arrived, it was time for Phase III... Get out there and dance!

Stimulus-Response kicked in.  The pre-programmed lemmings jumped off the cliff and entered the dance floor even though they were clueless.  Urban Cowboy had just promised America that Western dancing was wildly popular in Houston, so Civic Duty demanded we prove it.  The hype, the hoopla, the fuss was so great that everyone felt an urgency to get out there and try despite their queasy misgivings.  After all, didn't the rumor say it wasn't that tough?  

Everyone was certain of one thing... we were all supposed to go a Western club and hang out to show our Texas Pride.  Every dance floor in the city was mobbed with people who did not know what they were doing.  The problem was not exclusive to Cowboy.  All the upscale clubs had the same problem.  Overnight the floors turned into Bumper Car Calamity.  This resulted in a mob of unruly people who pushed, tripped, stumbled, fell, lost their temper, and behaved rudely.  There was so much animosity released by the collisions that it threatened to destroy the fun of Western dancing, the very thing we were supposed to be celebrating.  No one could have ever have imagined this. 

As my friend Bob Job put it, "Urban Cowboy just became a synonym for Urban Chaos."

SUBCHAPTER 842 - COSMIC JOKE NUMBER TWO

The Aggies were furious and with good reason.  At the exact moment they expected to get recognition for their dancing, all these stupid city slickers showed up to rain on their parade.  It was the very definition of Irony.  For the first time ever, Country completely dominated here in Houston, but all these rookies were in their way.  Instead of racing around the dance floor to the strains of Devil Went Down to Georgia, these hotshot Aggie dancers were reduced to a frustrating crawl.  They immediately blamed the influx of Disco dancers for the problem.  However they were wrong.  It wasn't the Disco people rushing to the floors who caused the problem.  The Disco people were a small minority.  The problem was caused by the mass migration to the western clubs by countless people who had never danced before. 

So who were all these people clogging up the floors?  Now that was a very interesting question.  I had always wondered why the Houston Rodeo was such a big hit.  After all, the people who ran in the circles I occupied could care less.  During Phrase III, I got my answer.  I had just discovered a different type of 'Urban' Cowboy.  To keep things simple, let's call them 'Suburban Cowboys'.  These were not the blue collar cowboys of the movie, these were white collar cowboys.  I learned for the first time that many Houston professionals identified strongly with the Country image and lifestyle. 

They liked the music, they liked the Rodeo, they drove a pickup truck, they wore a cowboy hat, they liked Westerns, John Wayne was their hero, they owned a gun, they liked to hunt, they talked Texan, and they wore cowboy boots.  However, they couldn't dance a lick because they were raised in the city!  Just because a Houston man wore boots and listened to Country music didn't mean he could dance to it. 

When the movie hit, I would guess two-thirds of the people on the dance floors were dancing Western for the first time in their lives.  That included a lot of people who drove pickup trucks with their radio dial set to KIKK-FM.  These non-dancing Suburban Cowboys were in for a mean surprise.  During Phase II, every day for a year Houston's Bubba population had driven to work listening to a radio DJ promising that Urban Cowboy would do the same thing for Kicker Dancing that Saturday Night Fever did for Disco. 

Over time, the subliminal message did the trick.  Kicker Nation was hypnotized into the belief that Western Dancing was in their future.  Due to all the hype, the movie created pressure on every cowboy inside Houston's city limits to dance for the very first time.

The mass migration to the dance floor spelled disaster for many.  This is when Cosmic Joke Number Two kicked in.  These Western Dance virgins were in for a very rude surprise.  They had been led to believe that Kicker dancing was easy.

Uh, sorry, guys, you're a year late.  In the good old days, country dance could be learned on the fly.  However the Old Style had disappeared in the Upscale Clubs over the past year thanks to the Aggies.  Welcome to Phase III.  If you want to stick around, you had better learn the trickier New Style.  

Without dance teachers, the entire city was pretty much forced to figure out the dancing on their own or bite the bullet and take dance lessons.  Well, tough luck, Houston, but good luck for me.  As one would imagine, I was swamped with students.  This fortuitous development is the reason my dance studio became famous overnight. 

That said, the vast majority of people tried to figure out the dancing on their own.  And of course they stumbled.  This is when the chaos ensued.  Angry at the slowpokes who didn't know what they were doing, the hotshots lashed out by 'accidentally' pushing people in the back or bumping into them.  Others would holler "Get out of my way!" 

Take a guess how the newcomers felt about the browbeating.  Tired of getting pushed around and frustrated with their lack of knowledge, the newcomer's tempers were boiling.  The crowded conditions made for inevitable collisions and everyone was getting tense.  There were lots of angry voices, threats, insults, ruffled feathers and wounded feelings.  Only a few actual fists were thrown, but there were a lot of close calls.  Fortunately there were women around to bring the hot heads back to their senses.

So that leaves us with one last unanswered question.  Why jump off the cliff when you know you are sure to die??

SUBCHAPTER 843 - SURVIVAL OF THE FITTEST

Back in the days of cattle roaming the vast Texas prairie, Country Dancing originated as a way for lonely cowboys to meet women at Saturday night Barn Dances.  However, this dance tradition never made it to Houston.  Available women were no longer 20 miles away, they were right next door.  Once men found they could meet girls in local bars, churches, down the street, on the job, etc, they skipped the dancing altogether.  Dancing was no longer necessary as a courtship device, so it largely disappeared in the Big City.

Trust me, if given a choice between riding a mechanical bull or learning to Twostep to prove they were a Real Cowboy, these modern cowboys would have opted for the bull every time.  It's one thing to bust a rib.  That is 'manly'.  It is another thing entirely to have one's pride wounded after stumbling through a Twostep with a girlfriend trying her best not to burst out laughing or screaming over missing toes.  Few men can learn to partner dance without training of some sort.  Women have the luxury of Following, but most men need someone to explain it to him.  Without teachers, who was going to show the average guy what to do?  Most of these guys were trying to learn by trial and error and not getting very far.

So that brings us to our final question.  Over the past year prior to the Debut of Urban Cowboy, non-dancing cowboys had visited the upscale bars.  Each time they had the sense to stay glued to their chairs rather than display their inadequacy.  Following the Debut of Urban Cowboy, now the cowboys reluctantly agreed to try.  What changed their minds?  Why would these guys try to dance if they did not know what to do? 

Where did this sudden bravado come from? 

Here is my theory.  The Texas Aggies and Urban Cowboy had given women so much power that the rules of the game had changed.  Pretty much for the entire Twentieth Century, Houston men had gotten a free pass when they uttered the usual 'I don't know how' excuse.  Urban Cowboy emboldened Houston women to demand their men to take them to a Western Club.  Eager to please, unsuspecting men escorted their ladies to the nearest Upscale Kicker Club.  Now they were trapped.  To their dismay, once they were on the premises, their girlfriends and their sneaky buddies expected them to try the dancing. 

I am convinced countless young men were being bullied by their women into hitting the dance floor for the first time in their lives.  The girls would not take no for an answer because the movie had made country dancing cool.  I had long believed the three most powerful forces of nature were Gravity, Nuclear Energy, and Gossip.  Now I had just discovered a fourth power:  Female Persuasion.  Frustrated, ordinarily the cowboys would take one look and say forget it.  But these were not ordinary times.  Men began to approach the floor despite reservations.   Why?  Ignorance, Beer, and Women with promises. 

The Ignorance helped because anyone could see this slowpoke style of dancing didn't look too tough.  The Beer helped because it gave men false confidence.  But the real reason the men got out there was Female Persuasion, an irresistible force.  Women love to dance and they intuitively sensed the time had come to speak up.  Now that Western dancing had become the new Merit Badge of being Texan, the ladies had more leverage than any other time in Texas history.  Any man who refused to try the Texas Twostep was branded a coward and instantly stripped of his dignity. 

But even more important, Country Dancing had emerged as a Big City courtship ritual for the very first time ever.  The pretty girls knew for a fact that a Cowboy would do ANYTHING for love, even if meant trying to dance for the first time in his life.  That realization included 'Suburban Cowboys'.  First the cowgirls got their men liquored up.  Smart move.  Men will face a gunfight if they get drunk enough.  Then came the sweet talk.  Let me tell you, a pretty girl with a wink and a promising smile is tough to resist. 

"Ah, c'mon, Luke, I want you to put your arms around me and stop being such a sissy.  Yew can do it; it ain't that hard!  Just look at all those other guys out there.  If they can do it, I bet yew can do it too.  Come on, honey, don't be so stubborn.  Just git out there with me.  Don't worry, I'll help you figure it out!"  

A lot of these guys were fooled by how easy it looked.  And you know what?  It really was easy!  I imagine these newcomers would have done just fine if the Old Style had been in effect.  After all, Texas cowboys had been pushing their women backwards for 100 years.  How much skill does it take to push a girl backwards for an entire song?  What was any different now?  Well, that was the problem.  Things were different all because those damn Aggies had upped the ante.

'Step-touch Step touch Walk Walk' was a thing of the past.  Today's men were expected to do previously unthinkable things like dance backwards.  Oh my God, let women go forward?  Whose idea was that?  Nor did it stop there.  Men were expected to learn difficult Circle Turns.  Too late to turn back now.  Men walked the plank.  It was sink or swim.  Many of them sank.  Chagrined, a lot of them recognized what they were up against and made a pilgrimage to my dance studio. 

The problem was that Darwinian Principles had kicked in.  Country Dancing was no longer an afterthought, here in Houston it had become a method to find a girlfriend, or, in some cases, keep a girlfriend.  It was no longer okay to just to get out there.  To survive in this modern environment, now a guy had to know what he was doing.  There was actual competition on the dance floor to see which guys were the best dancers.  The unattached gals wielded tremendous power.  With all these guys to choose from, skill counted.  The men who knew how to dance got the girls, the men who didn't know were left to cry in their beer.  Sometimes life can be very unfair.

This competition led to Phase IV: Dance Wars!  It was no longer just Country versus Disco.  Now it was Dancers versus Non-Dancers.  The collision of two worlds had turned Houston's dance floors into a War Zone.  This set the stage for a major showdown.  The tension between the Cowboys and the Discos was about to hit the most sensitive topic of all... Western Dance Ability!  Let the best man win.