 |
Rick Archer's Note:
There is a time for playing it safe and there is a time for
Risky Business. The fear of losing Jennifer had caused
me to throw caution to the winds. What happens
when people bet with scared money? They make mistakes. Perhaps the Reader
noticed my Ultimatum contained a curious clause.
"Victoria makes up her mind
today. She
is welcome to consult everyone she knows. She either
leaves her home AND moves in with me OR I want her to
leave my life till circumstances permit a return."
To the naked
eye, one might conclude that I wanted Victoria to move in
with me. That was not true. Fortunately the Reader has been paying
attention, so this cannot be what I was thinking. Indeed, there was no way
in hell I wanted the Black Magic Woman anywhere near my
house. So
why would I seemingly invite her?
I wanted two
things. I wanted Jennifer and I wanted to keep my
dance career unharmed. To accomplish this, I had to
find a way to get Victoria to let go of me without invoking
her Blackmail Threat. By giving her the option
of moving in with me, I wanted to convey the message that I
respected her feelings for me. Call it a face-saving
gesture.
Why would I take
a chance like this? I knew for certain Victoria had no desire to live
here. All this talk about moving in with me was
never serious. When push came to shove, I was certain
Victoria would stay right where she was. Victoria hated my house. Her
daughter was sure to hate my house. Victoria's
suggestion to move in was classic manipulation meant to jerk my
chain. I expected the shock of learning how serious I
was about Jennifer would jolt Victoria to her senses and
remove any lingering thoughts about living with me.
|
|
MONDAY, OCTOBER 1, 1979
ULTIMATUM
|
|
It was
Monday, October 1. An important day. A Fateful
Day. Convinced the only way I could hold onto
Jennifer was to ditch Victoria pronto, I arranged to meet
her at noon.
In addition to telling her about Jennifer, I
intended to hand Victoria my Ultimatum.
As I drove
to the coffee shop to meet Victoria, I was furious
at Jennifer for not contacting me last
night. For that matter, she had not
answered her phone this morning at home or at work. She had to know I was worried
sick. Consequently I was going into this meeting
blind. I did not have the slightest idea where
Jennifer stood with Jeff, a very troubling thought. Her failure to
communicate did not bode well as
Victoria walked into the coffee shop. Sensing this was going to be ugly,
Victoria did not
look happy. Well, tough.
Too late now. No turning back.
I had decided to roll the dice.
For the
past month I kept hoping Michael would say, "Victoria, me or Rick. Decide now."
If Michael did that, he would be the Bad Guy and
save me the trouble.
But an entire month had passed and
Michael had not put his foot down. Now the
sudden threat of Jeff had forced me to say it
instead. "Victoria, your house or
mine. Make up your mind."
|
 |
That is
NOT what I wanted to say. What I really wanted
to say was: "Victoria,
I have met someone else. I have chosen her
over you."
Is that
what I said? No. I
could not say that. By flat-out rejecting
Victoria, I risked triggering the scorn to justify carrying out her
Blackmail Threat. So I took a passive stance
by
offering Victoria a choice. By wording the
Ultimatum incorrectly, I hoped to contain
some of
her wrath. I had only
used that 'move in with me' language to PRETEND I was serious about a relationship.
Of course it was a gamble, but giving her a choice
seemed like the only way to protect the studio.
So how risky was my gamble? To be honest, I was not terribly worried.
When
forced to choose, I expected Victoria would never dream of leaving the
comfort and
security of her
home. Okay, here goes nothing.
"Victoria, I have something to tell you.
Your instincts are correct. I have met someone else."
Victoria stared at me
blankly. This surprised me. I had expected Snarling Tiger Woman to rage and snarl, but
I was wrong.
Nor was there any 'deer in the headlights' shocked
look. Noting the absence of surprise in her
expression, all I had done was confirm something
Victoria was already certain about. Apparently last week's answering machine snafus were
enough to trigger Victoria's intuition.
|
 |
A
good minute passed before Victoria decided to speak.
"I
confronted you about this last week, but you denied it. I am very disappointed in you
for lying to me. So this would be a good time to
start telling the truth. Who is she,
Rick?"
"You don't know her."
"Don't
beat around the bush, I deserve to know. Who is she?"
"Look, Victoria, we've been through this before with Joanne and
Patricia. We
are going to do this one my way. Call her Madame X. Her identity stays secret.
This is between you and me."
We argued for a while
over Jennifer's identity until
Victoria realized I wasn't going to budge. It would stay 'Madame X'
for now.
"What do you want
me to say, Rick? The last time I checked, you and I were
discussing moving in together. You have not been dealing with me
in good faith."
"No,
Victoria, that is not correct. You are the one who
brings up the subject of moving in, not me. I have
been asking you to make up your mind for three months.
In that time, you have made no commitment to me.
You are married and living with your husband. As
far I am concerned, your endless indecision has allowed another woman to enter
my life."
|
Victoria
flinched when I said that.
Believe it or not, I did have a backbone. However,
since keeping my dance program intact was more important to me
than standing up to Victoria, so far I had always backed
down. I was like the person
with a tyrant for a boss who bites his tongue because his
family depends on him to keep his job. In
this case, however, saving my relationship with Jennifer
had become
more important than my job. I had decided the time had come to stand
up and fight.
Victoria
sized me up, then responded. "How long
have you known her?"
"About a
month."
"Given the seriousness of my decision,
I had hoped you would have the
decency to keep your pants on till I figured out what is best
for us."
"What
gives you the privilege to know what is best
for us? What gives you the right to
tell Michael or me just how long we need to keep our
lives suspended so you can continue to chase your
tail? For that
matter, how am I supposed to know if you are keeping your pants on?"
"You know darn well my husband and I sleep in separate rooms!!"
"Oh,
really? So you say. Listen, we have argued about this a million times
over the past three months. You are
a mess. I am a mess. Your husband is a mess. Add
Stephanie to the list. All four of us are
miserable thanks to you. You say your daughter cries a lot and is afraid of losing her
parents. Why not admit how senseless it is to break up a marriage for
something as risky as our relationship?"
"I need more time."
"Time
for what? No,
Victoria, you
do not need more time. You need to decide today." I pulled out my Ultimatum and handed it to her.
"What is
this, Rick?"
"It is a
resolution I wrote out last night. I have decided
it is time for a decision."
Victoria
took one look at the Ultimatum and blinked.
Steeling herself, Victoria read it aloud softly.
'Victoria makes up her mind
today. She
is welcome to consult everyone she knows. She either
leaves her home AND moves in with me OR I want her to
leave my life till circumstances permit a return.'
Victoria
shook her head in despair.
"Rick,
what is wrong with you? Are you really suggesting
I can make a decision of this magnitude without
sufficient time to evaluate? You
know I can't do that! I have a child. I
have a marriage. I have a home. You can't just snap your fingers and
demand I give all this up on the spot."
Victoria
did not know it, but I secretly agreed with her.
The Ultimatum was indeed an outrageous demand.
And why would I make an outrageous demand? Because I did not
actually want her to accept the terms. My hope
was she would demand more time. In that case,
I would stand up and walk away without a reply.
After that, whenever Victoria would start to argue,
I would say she missed her deadline, she had her chance.
My job
today was to get Victoria to reject my Ultimatum without
angering her too much. The best way to avoid
angering her more than necessary was to say as little
as possible. So did I get up and leave?
No, I stuck around.
"What
makes you say I am snapping my fingers? Damn
it, Victoria, I have been asking you to make up your
mind for three months. This cannot go on
indefinitely. What is
magically going to come along to change this impasse? One month from
now it will be the same story! 'Oh, Rick, please, I need more
time...' I'm sick of it! This has to end now."
"Rick, you forget something. I am in love with you. And you are supposed
to be in love with me."
"Victoria, I COULD be in love with you, but I
am not in love with you. You have never opened the door
wide enough to let me in. I will never be in love with you
unless you make a commitment to me first. How many times have I
told you that? I can't turn my feelings on and off.
The risk of getting hurt is too great. I won't let myself be
vulnerable to your erratic mood swings."
"What about my threat to
bury your dance program you if you leave me?"
"I don't care any more. Your threat was valid in
September, but this is October. I expect enrollments to be so
small, what difference does it make if you ruin me? Camelot is dead.
You would know that if you ever visited. The
Pistachio Club is closing soon.
Your old buddy Larry said so himself.
So, tell me, Victoria, what do I have
to lose? If you carry out your threat, all you will do
is cost me the few remaining students I have. Besides,
have you forgotten I have a copy of the mailing list? After I
write my rebuttal and mail it out, people will see you
as you really are, the woman who threw away her marriage
for nothing. Meanwhile, your husband
will read both letters. Michael will be so disgusted,
his next move will be Divorce Court. And I
will offer to join him as a witness for the
prosecution."
|
In
Hindsight, I should never have been so candid. The
less said, the better. I will say one thing
however. Victoria was startled. She was so used to seeing me back down,
my broadside flattened her.
I saw the look of fear on her face when I said 'Divorce Court'. She had just figured out that I could hurt her badly
by siding with Michael.
In addition,
she knew Urban Cowboy
had taken the steam out of her threat.
From her point of view, I might just be
willing to gamble away the last crumbs of dance program.
At this point, I did not
have much to lose. This was Risky Business
to be sure, but for once I held the cards.
Victoria
looked defeated. My
counter-punch was tougher than her threat. However, to her credit, she tried again. Without much
enthusiasm, Victoria replied, "Your teaching career will
be over. No one will stick around after my
letter."
|
 |
| |
"Don't be
ridiculous. People won't even care.
Besides, Class Factory will send
me new students. I can rebuild my program, but you
will never get Stephanie back."
"You
wouldn't do that!"
"Actually,
yes I would. You keep forgetting I can write a letter of my own, Victoria. No matter what you say,
my rebuttal letter will reach those same people. I
will tell the world you had three months to make up your
mind.
That counts for something in the court of public
opinion. It would probably serve as evidence in a
court of law as well. How much sympathy do you expect to get
after I tell everyone what you have subjected Stephanie and
Michael to? After I reveal how Stephanie cries
pitifully
every time you guys argue, what they will think
of you as a mother? So go ahead, write your
letter. Then I will write mine. After I point out I stepped
aside for the good of your child, no one will be your
side."
Victoria
covered her mouth and gasped. Yes, I had finally
decided to play dirty. I was so desperate to get
rid of Victoria, I had just played the 'Stephanie
Card'. That is how serious I was about ending
this now. It gave me no pleasure to talk like
this, but I felt cornered. Seeing Victoria on the ropes, I
continued.
"I will wrap myself in the
guise of being noble. First I will print a copy of your 'Husband List'
from back in July. That will prove that you admit your husband is a good man,
a man who
does not deserves to be treated in such a shabby way.
What exactly are you going to tell the court to explain
why you would abandon a good husband who has done
nothing wrong? People will scorn you and call you
a
fool for betraying Michael. I will admit I
have feelings for you, then explain that I have chosen to
break away while you still have the chance to save your
marriage. Due to my respect for your marriage, I
am ending this infatuation because it is the right
thing to do. I will add I am
doing this for
your daughter who cries all the time because she afraid of losing her parents."
"Do you
really expect people will buy that?"
"You
better believe they will. I will explain how my
father ruined my life with his affair and that I swore
to myself I would never do such a thing to your
daughter. Trust me, they will believe my
testimony.
Ultimately you will be the biggest loser.
I will either rebuild the dance program or get another job. But you're the one who
faces divorce and the loss of your child. You're
the one who has caused your daughter to have nightmares.
Next month Class Factory will
send me new students who could care less who you are.
You will be forgotten in a flash. Furthermore, the next time
you see me, I'll be sitting next to Michael and his
lawyer in Divorce Court."
I paused to
let my words sink in. After sufficient time, I
resumed. "It does not have to come to that,
Victoria. I would much rather take the high
road. I would like to stay friends. If you promise to drop your Blackmail Threat, we can try to
rescue what is left of this dance program.
Maybe there's still time to turn it around."
I meant what
I said. I wanted Victoria to be my friend.
But first she had to accept that I had a new girlfriend.
Plus these threats and demands had to stop. If
Victoria would do that, hopefully we could mend our fences.
Would she agree to do that? I had no idea. Victoria
was white as a ghost. I had never threatened her like
this before. I think my counter attack caught her off guard the same
way she caught me off guard last week with her
Blackmail Threat. My aggressiveness was a serious departure from my passive,
patient approach during the past three months.
Victoria was shocked to see me fight fire with fire. To be honest, I was kind of shocked
myself. This was the first time in my life I had
ever gone for someone's throat. It wasn't my style to play dirty, but I was fed up.
This nonsense ends here. Today. No more
postponements. Jennifer was
far too important
to delay one more moment.
Victoria
stared at me wordlessly. She could scarcely
believe I had just dared her to go public. Not
only had I called her bluff, she now knew I had a hand of cards better
than hers. Maybe
Victoria really was in love with me. However, her
love for her daughter went much deeper. She knew
Stephanie needed her mother and needed the security
of the home she was raised in. For all her faults,
Victoria was a terrific mother. She would die if Michael took
Stephanie from
her. Hmm. Maybe Scorched Earth was not such a good
idea. It could easily backfire on her. Nevertheless, Victoria did
not give up. Victoria
was a born fighter. As we went back and forth, I was
able to contradict every argument she presented with a
strong argument of my own. I rattled off the
facts.
•
Victoria had attempted to betray her husband, a decent man
who had done nothing to deserve this.
•
Victoria
was making her daughter miserable.
•
What kind of woman
chooses something as frivolous as Disco dancing over her
own family?
•
Victoria had signed the Affirmation Letter.
That was evidence that I was trying to do the right
thing.
•
The Forbidden Line had not been crossed,
further evidence that I was trying to do the right
thing.
• The Husband List made Victoria look like a
fool for choosing a man with a failing career over
her successful husband.
Victoria
was a smart woman. She could see my
counter-attack would be devastating. Sure,
Victoria could damage my reputation with some well-chosen
words. But what about her own reputation?
Did Victoria really wish to invite scandal? She was
a married woman with a child. She had no business
chasing a dance instructor with a failing career. She had hurt her husband
who had not done anything to deserve her cruelty.
If she wasn't careful, she would lose me, she would lose
her husband, maybe her home and her daughter too. Most
of all, she would be widely criticized for throwing away
a good husband for a silly fad that was on the
edge of extinction. Given the plethora of factors
in my favor, I was feeling very confident.
"Listen
carefully, Victoria. After my letter,
every person who knows you will wonder if you have lost
your mind.
Imagine what they will say. You could very easily end up as a laughing stock
for spurning a decent man in order to chase a 'Playboy'.
After I point out how you
praised Michael in the Husband List, they will call you the biggest fool on earth
for throwing your marriage way.
Why would you want to take that chance?"
Victoria
paled. She was
clearly intimidated by my tough talk. If
she wasn't careful, Victoria could end up looking like a
confused,
desperate woman who jilted her husband and crippled her
child in the process. Victoria became very quiet.
Yes, she could ruin me. But I could ruin her
too. Was she really willing to risk going nuclear?
To do so was insanity, better known as 'MAD', the
cynical acronym for 'Mutual
Assured Destruction'.
Victoria
crossed her arms and stared blankly at her coffee cup.
With an air of resignation, she brought up Madame X
again.
"Who is she, Rick? Who is the other woman?
I have to know. I deserve to know."
The moment
Victoria said that, I knew I had won. It was over.
What should I do now? I decided to soften the blow.
|
MONDAY, OCTOBER 1, 1979
CASABLANCA
|
|
Victoria was backing down.
Yes, I had won. What should I do, be mean
or be kind? Did I want to destroy this woman or did I
want to take a chance and try to restore our friendship? If Victoria would willingly
relinquish her hold on me, I much preferred to be friends.
We had come close to the 'Forbidden Line', but
technically we had not crossed it. Surely there was a way to
restore the warm friendship we once enjoyed.
Perhaps Victoria could return to normal and help me
fight the impending threat of the Dancing Cowboy. This was my
chance to end this star-crossed romance on good terms, not ugliness. I
decided to go for it.
"Look, Victoria,
you don't know Madame X. What difference does it
make who she is? You've never met her, you've never seen her. I know you are upset
about this woman and I don't blame you for a moment, but this
conversation is not about Madame X. This is about you and me.
You are MARRIED, Victoria. I have not seen one
action on your part that makes me think you are
serious about leaving your husband. I have heard nothing but empty words
for the past three months. This has gone on long enough.
Please set me free and let's be friends. No, I am
not going to chase you away. You
don't have to leave the studio unless it is by your own choice.
On the contrary, I want you to stick around. I
want to
return to being friends."
Victoria
looked sad, but she did not reply. This was unusual. Victoria always had a comeback, but not this
time.
Her silence invited me to continue,
so I decided to swing for the fences.
I
smiled when the ending of Casablanca crossed
my mind. In the movie,
my namesake Rick
Blaine was noble to step aside. His sacrifice allowed Ilsa to return to her
husband Laszlo. Perhaps if I acted in a similar way, Victoria would
willingly return to Michael.
"Victoria,
the moment you decide you are
definitely willing to become my life partner... and convince me that
my goals are goals which you can willingly embrace... that is when I
will give up any other sexual, romantic relationships I now have. I
will give 100% to making OUR relationship work. No one else. Just
you and I, doing the best we can to share our lives together. But until that moment arrives,
what
I do with my free time is my own business."
|
Did I mean
what I said? No. Never in my wildest
imagination did I wish to enter into a committed relationship with
this woman. But I felt it was important to say
something nice.
I did not enjoy
kicking Victoria in the teeth. When I didn't despise
Victoria, I was fond of her. I prayed that my actions
would lead to her reconciliation with Michael. In
other words,
I was sending Victoria back to Victor Laszlo.
"Here's Looking At You, Kid."
So what was with
the sweet talk? Ilsa was not bitter towards Rick
Blaine. She had never threatened to
burn down Rick's Café Américain, the smoky,
intrigue-filled nightclub seen in Casablanca.
Having just rejected a woman with an unhealthy obsession, I feared an unstable Victoria
was capable of going off the deep end. If Victoria
walked away feeling spurned, she might turn vindictive and spread cancerous
rumors behind my
back. By softening the blow, I hoped to
avoid the return of Snarling Tiger Woman.
Did I fear
Victoria would misinterpret my Casablanca Speech? No.
Convinced that Victoria
would never leave her husband on a day's notice, I felt safe saying
something kind that might help save face and
ease the
pain. Hoping to keep my reputation intact was another good
reason to
soften the blow. Let her down easy.
I wanted it all.
I wanted Jennifer, I wanted to avoid triggering
Victoria's wrath and I wanted her friendship. In addition, maybe I could persuade
Victoria to help me repair the damage at the studio.
|
 |
Victoria
did not reply to my Casablanca Speech. She just sat there looking
at me with a curious expression.
Pleased with my victory, I ended the conversation
with one last noble statement.
"You are
very important to me, Victoria. We came close, didn't
we? I will
remember the times when we used to laugh and dance.
But this doesn't have to be the end. Is it possible for us to find a way to return to those days
of friendship?"
Victoria spoke up in a soft voice. "I hear
what you say. I need some time to
think about what you said."
To my surprise,
Victoria picked up my Ultimatum and left.
She did not seem angry, so I smiled as Victoria
walked out the door. What a relief. I had won my freedom
and somehow managed to keep the studio safe. It was time to tell Jennifer the good news.
|
|
