TUESDAY, OCTOBER 2, 1979, MIDNIGHT CROSSING THE FORBIDDEN LINE

The Forbidden Line was crossed shortly after Midnight.  The moment we finished, anguish over the betrayal of her wedding vows hit Victoria with crushing force.  Clinging to a pillow and rocking back and forth, she wailed "What have I done?  What have I done?"

Consumed with guilt and full of remorse, Victoria did not sleep the entire night.  Instead she cried the entire time.  No further words were exchanged.  Nor did we touch again.  Although Victoria and I shared a bed, we dealt with our mutual grief alone.

To be honest, I had not anticipated Victoria's torrent of grief.  My first reaction was fury.  I was not at all sympathetic.  Before we began, I had asked Victoria point-blank if she was sure about this.  She said yes.  Now she was miserable and I felt like a fool.  If Victoria was this upset, then why insist on doing this in the first place?   Fueled by desperation, I concluded this unwelcome event had been an act of extreme impulsiveness born of desperation.  I felt that crossing the line had been a mistake of colossal proportions on both our parts. 

Feeling like a patsy for allowing myself to cooperate with this startling act of stupidity, I doubted I would ever forgive Victoria.  Was I an Adulterer?  Kind of, but no, not exactly.  Committing adultery is the act of being unfaithful to your spouse.  However, I was definitely guilty of contributing.  Most Christians will agree that an extra-marital affair is a sin.  However, there was an asterisk.  To be honest, I felt more like a victim than a perpetrator.  I only went through with this because I was 100% convinced Victoria was now living with me.  In my mind, that meant Victoria had officially separated from her husband.  Victoria promised me she had told Michael she was leaving him to move in with me and that he did not stop her.  Having brought a suitcase to prove it, it was my understanding that Victoria wanted to be with me.  Now that we were officially living together, when Victoria insisted on sex, I did not protest. 

Imagine my shock when she burst into tears after we finished.  Watching her endless sobbing, if Michael had asked me to give her back, trust me, I would have cooperated in a flash.  I did not sleep a wink.  How could I with this wailing banshee beside me?  All night long I shook my head in disgust.  How had it come to this?  I had just participated in a distasteful deed I had been trying to avoid for an entire year.  Although I considered myself a reluctant participant, there was no way I could forgive myself.  I never wanted this and still had no idea why I had allowed myself to be persuaded to cooperate.  Typically Adultery revolves around Desire.  Not this time.  Desire never entered into the picture.  I did not want Victoria and, considering her total lack of passion and subsequent grief, she obviously did not want me.  This was a classic 'Take Back' on both our parts.  The more I thought about what had taken place, the more I felt trapped.  I did not know who to blame the most.  My unwise decision to place a 'Move-In' suggestion in my Ultimatum was Exhibit A.  Victoria's Blackmail Threat to destroy my studio was Exhibit B.  Jennifer's cowardice was Exhibit C.  Michael's cooperation to let Victoria out the door was Exhibit D.  If any one of us had behaved like an adult, this would have never happened. 

Was I a 'Victim'?  I confess I felt like one.  At the same time I also felt I had been set-up by the Force of Fate.  I firmly believed that God's Will had placed me in this situation.  In that case, I assumed Karma was involved.  For that reason, I accepted responsibility.

TUESDAY, OCTOBER 2, DAY TWO OF LIVING TOGETHER the STARTLING 6 AM DEVELOPMENT

I said I did not sleep, but I suppose I got an hour of sleep close to dawn.  In the morning, I was awakened by Victoria's movement in the bedroom.  She was getting dressed.  A quick glance at the clock said 6 am.  Considering I assumed we had just begun to 'live together', why leave now?  Don't we have things to talk about?  Sitting up in bed, I asked, "What are you doing, Victoria?"

"I promised Michael I would be home before our daughter wakes up."

What?!?!

I stared at Victoria in wide-eyed bewilderment.  This entire fiasco had taken place specifically because Victoria had announced SHE WAS LIVING WITH ME.

I had participated in sex BECAUSE I ASSUMED WE WERE LIVING TOGETHER. 

Clearly her idea of living with me and my idea were badly out of sync.  Following her announcement to leave, there was not another word spoken.  I watched in astonishment as Victoria threw her clothes on as fast as she could.  Although I remained silent, I was burning with rage over her lack of candor.  Not once did I imagine Victoria would head home at the crack of dawn.  Why hadn't Victoria mentioned this precious tidbit last night when she decided to move in with me? 

Watching Victoria dress at the speed of light, I was incredulous over this unexpected development.  My immediate conclusion was a feeling that I had been tricked.  That thought triggered an intense hatred towards Victoria and deep self-loathing for being stupid enough to fall for her unforgiveable deceit.  I strongly suspected Victoria's sole intention all along was to have sex so I would be obligated to stick with her whether I wanted to or not.  If so, that was a very sick thing to do.  Last night's tears were no doubt caused by remorse for violating her marital vows.  In addition she felt overwhelming guilt for leaving her six year old daughter behind. 

Speaking of Stephanie, an odd thought crossed my mind.  Stephanie's name had not come up once during our living room conversation last night.  Nor did the thought of Stephanie cross my mind while I watched Victoria sob in bed all night long.  That was weird.  Why had I forgotten about Victoria's daughter?  If ever there was a topic that should have been covered IN ADVANCE PRIOR TO VICTORIA'S DECISION TO MOVE IN WITH ME, it would have been Victoria's plan for her daughter.  This was huge.  Why?  Because it indicated Victoria did not truly intend to move in with me.  More likely, she just wanted to shack up and I fell for it.  At that thought, I wanted to explode.  If Victoria had found the courtesy to mention her intention to drive home in the morning, I would have never consented to sex. 

So why did Victoria fail to mention Stephanie last night?  As I said, the reason was deceit.  Well, too late now.  The deed was done.  I watched glumly as Victoria continued to dress.  Once the last button was finished, without a word or even a glance, she raced out of my house.  Well aware I no longer mattered, out of curiosity I followed Victoria.  Standing on my porch, I watched in muted horror as she jumped in her car and sped off so her husband could go to work.  Did she wave goodbye?  No.  Why bother?  Victoria was obsessed with getting home before her daughter awoke.  Instantly I was consumed with even greater rage at Victoria.  And rage at myself for being so easily deceived.  This very well could be the worst mistake I had ever made in my life.

What in the hell have I gotten myself into?  Theoretically, when two people become lovers after a yearlong buildup of passion, one expects a romantic morning.  Such was not the case.  No cuddling.  No coffee.  No warm good-morning greeting.  No smile.  No goodbye kiss.  In fact, if I had not awakened, I believe Victoria would have simply let herself out the door. 

As I watched her car screech around the corner, I had no idea what to expect next.  It was Tuesday, so Victoria was scheduled to teach at the studio tonight.  What would happen afterwards?  Back to her own house?  Car Talk?  Or would she follow me home?  My guess is she would come over after our dance classes ended, then leave again at 6 am on Wednesday morning. 

In her haste, I noticed Victoria left her suitcase behind.  Clever move with the suitcase.  The presence of that suitcase is what had convinced me she was serious about moving in.  Full of suspicion, I grabbed the suitcase and threw it on the bed.  It was a massive suitcase, the kind that holds half your dresser.  However, it was light as a feather.  Suspicious, I decided to look.  One pair of panties, a toothbrush and toothpaste.  The vast emptiness said it all.  It was a trick.  I had been an idiot to be fooled so easily. 

Waves of self-loathing came flooding in.  How did I ever let her fool me like this?  Shame overwhelmed me.  I thought she was serious.  After all, that is what Victoria said she was doing.  My written words had been explicit:  'Victoria either leaves her home AND moves in with me...'

What utter, complete nonsense.  Last night Victoria said she was moving in me.  In reality, Victoria's intention was to have to sex.  Not for pleasure, mind you, but to get rid of Madame X.  I was sure of it. 

Victoria had pretended to move in with me and I fell for it! 

Since Michael had to know his wife was here at my house, I had taken Victoria at her word that she had fulfilled her end of the bargain.  Fooled into thinking we were living together, this was little better than a one-night stand.  Feeling supremely outwitted, I stomped into the kitchen and made some coffee.  I knew full-well that Victoria was capable of lying, so why had I let down my guard so easily?  Furious at myself for being tricked so easily, I tried to figure out what had led me to believe Victoria was serious. 

The perfunctory sex was my first clue that something was very wrong.  Considering how somber we both felt, why had Victoria insisted on having sex so quickly?   The woman was adamant.  I frowned as the truth washed over me.  Knowing Victoria, she would insist we were Lovers which, of course, meant that I was obligated to be Faithful to her.  In other words, no more Madame X.  Turning crimson, I was positive this is why she had raced to consummate her goal.  What an idiot I was.  The woman could not bully me into sex, the woman could not make me fall in love with her, the woman could not seduce me.  So she tricked me instead.  And I was dumb enough to fall for the enticement of a modern-day Delilah.  Shame washed over me.  Feeling played for a fool, I felt so humiliated.

The worst part was knowing how close I had come to getting my freedom.  If I had not answered the phone at the studio last night, this would have never happened.  Stuck with a woman I didn't want, was there any chance to get Jennifer back?  Probably not.

MOTHERHOOD

Why had I forgotten about Stephanie last night?  One reason could be traced to my lousy childhood.  Having grown up with two of the world's worst parents, I knew little about how superior parents operated.  By the standards on which any educated, middle class parent can be judged, my mother and father were beyond mediocre.  My father abandoned me to marry his mistress while my mother's frequent absence at night to chase men was standard operating procedure. 

Following the divorce, my mother was barely able to care for herself, much less me.  Looking for love, my mother hit the bars several nights a week.  She left me, an only child, to fend for myself starting at age 9.  I grew up assuming all mothers were more than willing to ditch their kids in pursuit of a man.  

Victoria's 6 am sprint to her daughter's side was my first clue that the bond between a mother and her child is unfathomably powerful.  Victoria adored Stephanie and vice versa. 

For all her shortcomings, Victoria was a dedicated, conscientious mother who loved her child dearly.  I have to say that I was very impressed with her maternal side.  She was a great mother.  But I was not impressed with her deceitful nature. 

regret and self-loathing

Sitting in my kitchen, I was sick with despair over falling for Victoria's clever move.  I blamed her, but I also blamed myself.  I was filled with profound regret at how badly yesterday's coffee shop confrontation had backfired.  At the same time, I was unsure how much I should blame myself for writing the words that had allowed Victoria to enter my house.  Yes, I had gambled and failed, but even in hindsight I thought daring her to leave the comfort of her home had been a reasonable chance to take.  I never believed there was the slightest possibility Victoria would come over last night based on those words.  I am quite serious.  The thought had never crossed my mind.  Just as I was totally blind-sided by Jennifer's announcement that she was engaged, I was equally blind-sided by Victoria's ill-considered and quite unexpected act of desperation. 

I suppose my biggest mistake was to confirm the existence of Madame X at the Coffee Shop.  If I had left 'Madame X' out of it and just called Victoria's bluff over the Blackmail Threat, my gamble would have worked.  All I can say is that I was under so much pressure to get Victoria off my back, I did the best I could under the circumstances.  Like I keep saying, don't bet with scared money.

The funny thing... or should I say 'tragic'?... is that it almost worked!  I had Victoria pinned on her heels with my Coffee Shop confrontation.  It was that damn Jennifer who let Victoria off the ropes.  Without a doubt, the single most troubling aspect of last night had been Jennifer's words... "Go to Victoria, she needs you."  Jennifer had seriously dropped the ball. 

Tormented by those words, I was really angry at Jennifer.  If Jennifer had given me any sign of hope, I daresay I would have handled Doorstep Night far differently.  It was too early to call Jennifer at work and confront her, so I just sat there feeling sorry for myself.  I recalled how powerless I had felt to escape this trap last night.  Let me explain.  While Victoria sat there sobbing on the couch, I had plenty of time to rack my brains for some face-saving way to escape my dilemma.  No solution had occurred to me.  Unable to think of any way to escape, I had behaved like a trapped animal who gives up and suffers.  Just then, out of nowhere, a solution occurred to me.  There had been a way out!!  Why didn't I call Michael?  I think a phone call to Michael would have made all the difference in the world.  It was so obvious.  Why didn't I think of that?

Now another disturbing thought hit.  What made me think I was obligated to have sex?  Why didn't I just sleep on the couch last night?  Or sleep in the guest room, lock the door and wait for daylight?   Considering how little I wanted Victoria here in the first place, what had come over me to participate in such a rash act without hesitation??  

Why didn't I bring up the subject of Stephanie, a deal-killer to be sure.  Stephanie had every right to be a part of Victoria's declaration of undying love.  So why didn't her name come up?  Or did Victoria plan to give Stephanie to Michael?  Not likely, especially considering the haste when she left my house this morning to go see her daughter.  

I was completely devastated by the total collapse of my common sense. 

Where were all these brilliant ways to extricate myself when my ass was on the line?  Too late now, the damage was done.  I felt betrayed by Jennifer, tricked by Victoria and incensed at myself for missing obvious evasive measures.  My panic served as a prime example of what happens under pressure.  I had uttered words I did not mean, failed to examine the suspicious suitcase, failed to remember her daughter, then allowed myself to be tricked into cooperating with an immoral deed totally against my nature. 

Marry in haste, repent at leisure. 

JENNIFER IS FURIOUS

Around 10 am, I called Jennifer at work.  Last night she had betrayed me by keeping me in the dark.  Now I wanted answers.  She answered curtly.  Not a good sign.  My first question was to ask how her weekend with Jeff had turned out.  Jennifer was non-committal.  Replying with a distinct coldness in her voice, Jennifer explained she had told her fiancé she wasn't ready to set a date.  However, she was still engaged, then added she didn't want to talk about it right now.  Before I could ask another question, Jennifer abruptly changed the subject. 

"What happened last night?  Did you sleep with her?"

After I told the truth, Jennifer exploded.

"How could you be so stupid?  What is wrong with you, Rick!?!  Just because Victoria spent the night did not obligate you to have sex!"

Sputtering, I replied, "But she took her clothes off and got into bed!  What was I supposed to do?"

"Just keep your pants on, stupid!"  

Ouch!  I felt like I had been slapped in the face.  I shuddered with self-contempt.  Jennifer was absolutely right.  All I had to do was keep my pants on.  Oh my God, what was wrong with me?  Why had that solution never crossed my mind? 

"But Victoria insisted!"

"Oh, you stupid, stupid fool!  I am so sure she overpowered you.  Don't you dare tell me you had no choice.  A woman cannot rape a man!  That means you did this of your own free will!" 

Jennifer paused to get her temper under control, then continued.

"I don't understand what made you think you were obligated to sleep with Victoria.  All you had to do was keep your pants on.  So what if she is naked?  Just tell her it's too soon.  Tuck her into bed, kiss her on the cheek, and go find the couch.  Instead you totally lost your sense of judgment."

Jennifer was right.  I had made an unforgiveable mistake.  But so did she.  Full of chagrin, I snapped back at her. 

"Okay, Little Miss Perfect, now I have a question for you.  When I called last night, why did you refuse to tell me you about Jeff?  Why did you push me away with your 'Victoria needs you' suggestion?  Damn it, Jennifer, our entire relationship hung in the balance on those words!!"

"I have work to do.  This can wait for later.  Goodbye."

After Jennifer hung up, I sat there seething.  First this woman ruined my life by hiding her fiancé from me.  Last night she refused to give me a direct answer about the status of her relationship with him.  This morning she suggested things were unchanged.  So why the hell didn't she tell me that last night?  What was the meaning of her vague answer last night?  Jennifer's behavior made absolutely no sense to me.  Jennifer had every right to be upset that I had crossed the Forbidden Line, but it was her own damn fault for not communicating like a grown woman at the crucial time.  Nothing about her recent behavior made a bit of sense.  I could see nothing plain.  Jennifer was a complete mystery to me.

DISCO ON THE CRITICAL LIST
 

On Tuesday night, only six people showed up for Victoria's 7 pm class.  She said she wanted to teach the class anyway, so I said okay.  My 7 pm class was not much better.  I had ten students.  No one showed up for Victoria's 8 pm Intermediate class, so she joined me in my 8 pm class.  Troubled by the small classes last night and tonight, I cannot begin to express how depressed I felt.  Making matters worse, when class ended, Victoria said she would follow me back to my house.  So which of Victoria's personalities showed up at my house that night?  Sunshine Victoria?  Nope.  Vindictive Victoria?  Nope.  Black Magic Woman?  Nope.  Snarling Tiger Woman?  Nope.  Medusa?  Nope.

It was the return of the Helpless Sniveling Whining Woman.  Victoria began crying from the moment she entered my house, thereby eliminating any conversation.  Exhausted, Victoria headed straight for the bed.  This time she slept with her clothes on, a switch that carried considerable irony for me.  Gee, why didn't I think of that?   But I didn't care.  I had no desire to touch her, so I slept with my clothes on too.  Victoria woke up every hour or so, cried some more, then went back to sleep.  What a miserable night.

WEDNESDAY, OCTOBER 3, DAY THREE OF LIVING TOGETHER

I TELL JOANNE TO LEAVE ME ALONE
 

On Wednesday morning, Day Three, Victoria again got up at the crack of dawn.  Since she was already dressed, she barely said a word other than to ask me to clear out a drawer for her.  Then, like a ghost, she vanished from sight.  This time she took her suitcase.  Was she moving back home?  More likely she was bringing more clothes.  If so, this suggested she was considering a more permanent situation.  What a nightmare. 

I was so miserable over the situation that I called Joanne at work.   "Listen, Joanne, I am not feeling very good right now.  Do you mind terribly if we skip our usual western workout today?"

Joanne was skeptical.  "Are you sure that's a good idea?  How about if we practice another day this week?"

"No, I need a break from country-western.  Maybe you forgot, but there's no class at Meyerland Club this week.  There's some sort of fashion show scheduled for the coming Sunday."

Joanne paused for a moment.  "All right, if we aren't going to practice, in that case let's go dancing at Rodeo on Sunday evening.  Sooner or later, you need to see what's going on out there with your own eyes.  The longer you stay blind, the more likely you are to get caught."

"You know what, Joanne?  My heart is just not in it.  In the mood I'm in, it wouldn't do much good to practice or visit a club.  It would just depress me even more.  Let's just see each other next Wednesday."

Joanne took a deep breath.  I could tell she wanted to protest, but decided not to. 

"Okay, Rick, if you say so.  See you next Wednesday."

WEDNESDAY, OCTOBER 3, DAY THREE OF LIVING TOGETHER

DEPRESSION SETS IN
 

My dance career was in crisis.  Based on the first two days of October classes, the dance program was down to 20% of our summer numbers.  The only people I had left were students like Monday night's Superstar class.  This class consisted of Die Hard regulars hated the thought of Country-Western as much as I did.  They intended to dance Disco to the bitter end, then go down with the sinking ship. 

I only had one class to teach tonight.  12 students at 7 pm.  I should have had two classes, but Donna Gordon had phoned me to say she did not have a single October Class Factory student to send me for tonight's 8 pm class.  No student means no class.  I shook my head in disgust.  This was a very ominous sign.  Without new blood, there was no future for my career as a Disco teacher.  Doubting that things would be much better on Thursday and Friday, October's low numbers made it increasingly apparent that Country-Western was the only possible way I could extend my dance career.  For this reason I should have taken Joanne's advice and accompanied her to Rodeo.  However my heart wasn't in.  Ordinarily I would need my full concentration to fight this crisis, but instead I frittered my energy away worrying about my twisted, unhappy love life.  Right now there was not much fight left in me.  I worried constantly about what Victoria would do next or if Jennifer would ever take me back.  Will the bad news ever stop?

That night Victoria came by the studio just as my 7 pm class was ending.  Based on the way she nosed around the room, I had a hunch she came by to see if Madame X was on the premises.  Victoria was dying to learn more about her rival, but I refused to discuss Madame X in the off chance Jennifer and I might still have a future.  After class, Victoria followed me home.  She did not cry tonnight, but I could tell she was suffering from unbearable depression.  I asked if she wanted to talk, but she shook her head.  She said she didn't want to talk about anything.  Instead she quietly emptied her suitcase into the drawer she had asked me to clear out.  

Victoria put on pajamas and made some popcorn.  She got into bed, turned on the TV and stared at it in a zombie-like trance.  I asked again if she wanted to talk, but she said no, adding she was still in shock.  Given her silence, I could not imagine what was running through her mind.  All I knew was that I wished she wasn't here.  As an only child, I had grown up a loner.  Nor had I ever asked a woman to live with me before.  Used to being alone, having this unwelcome guest in my home was driving me up a wall.  Tonight Victoria officially became the first woman ever to spend three nights in a row at my house, beating Jennifer's record of two.  Not that Victoria cared.  She did not want to be here, that was obvious, but I guess it was preferable to dealing with Michael.  Speaking of Michael, so far Victoria had refused to say a word about him or her daughter for that matter. 

I noticed that even with her new set of clothes, Victoria's drawer was only half-full.  Nor had she bothered to ask for a key.  We had yet to share coffee or a meal unless the popcorn counted.  To be honest, Victoria's idea of living together was perplexing to say the least.  Are we having fun yet?  I could barely contain my enthusiasm.  Staring at Victoria as she tossed and turned, I suddenly remembered that tonight was special for a very strange reason.  Today was the 15th anniversary of my Epic Losing Streak.  On this date in 1964, I was a good-looking kid when I went to bed.  As I slept, I was transformed into a gruesome monster due to an overnight explosion of acne.  Thanks to my acne-related scarred face, my fear of being unattractive had caused 15 years of Bad Luck with women.  I had hoped by dating Jennifer that this awful Curse was over with.  However, now that Victoria was calling the shots again, the Epic Losing Streak was still intact.  Nor was there any end in sight.  Could I possibly be more depressed?

THURSDAY, OCTOBER 4, DAY FOUR OF LIVING TOGETHER

VICTORIA'S DESTINY LETTER
 

Thursday, Day Four, was more of the same.  I never left the bed as Victoria dressed quietly and left wordlessly.  I was too depressed to move, so I just sat there contemplating the fix I was in.  Finally I got up and made some coffee.  While I was in the kitchen, I found a letter waiting for me on the table.  

The time said 'Wednesday at 6:00'.

No doubt Victoria had written it yesterday, but I had no idea if she meant 6 am or 6 pm.  Maybe she wrote it yesterday at 6 am while Stephanie slept.  Or maybe she wrote it at 6 pm while waiting for Michael to get home to watch Stephanie.  Curious, I began to read. 

Wednesday, 10-3, 6:00

"Hi Honey,

I hope you will accept this small gift from me.  I knew you were down today and I thought in some small way I could say 'I'm thinking of you and I love you.'

I hurt right now and I'm scared, but I still know that you are the most important person in my life and have been lighting up my life for sometime now. 

I know too that our relationship hasn't always been easy, but I have always felt that our being together was Destiny.  It's like no matter what happens, the Universe keeps pushing me in your direction and I can't seem to let go of you. 

Our love has been a risk in a lot of ways and I know we don't always feel 'safe' with it, but I do feel that growing and being includes taking certain risks.  No one can predict how these risks will turn out, but we'll never know if we don't take them.

I think you're a natural teacher, excellent teacher and I hope to always support you in that because that's your gift to all those people you teach.  They deserve you.

Regardless of what happens between us, I will always love you and thank you for all the things you've taught me and all those wonderful memories.  The times I spent with you will always be my most cherished memories.  Someday I hope you'll learn to let go and let yourself be loved because I can't think of anyone who deserves it more.

You're a part of me, Rick, so no matter what happens or where you go, I'll be with you in spirit."
 

This had to be the most baffling letter I had ever read.  This was not the Snarling Tiger Woman writing this note.  This was not the Helpless Sniveling Whining Woman.  Nor was it Medusa or the Black Magic Woman.  If I had to guess, this was the legendary Sunshine Victoria, the same woman who had briefly poured out her heart to me on Doorstep Night.  Victoria had said, "I believe we can grow past our distrust and fears if we truly commit.  All I ask is that you recognize we have the chance to be very special together."

I had thought the Sunshine side of Victoria had been eclipsed by her obsession.  I guess I was wrong.  This well-written letter suggested Victoria's soft side was still fighting to get out.  Here is what fascinated me.  This letter sounded like something I could have written to her.  When she spoke of 'Destiny', I was pleased to find we were on the same wavelength.  We had spoken of the Dance Curse enough times for me to know Victoria shared my suspicion that there is more to this world than meets the eye.  However, I had never revealed the full extent of my Mystical views to Victoria, so I was surprised to find she thought Doorstep Night was a Fated Event just like I did. 

What a shame her demons kept her decent side suppressed.  Based on this letter and my memory of Sunshine Victoria, I could not help but wonder what on earth had befallen this woman.  As an idle thought, I wondered if Michael ever asked the same question.  Victoria had told me many times how much Michael adored her.  I wondered if Michael was just as mystified as me to know whatever became of that wonderful woman he married.  If I did not know better, it felt like Victoria had fallen under an evil spell.  Hmm.