Victoria
Home Up Labor Day Weekend


 

 

MYSTERY OF THE TEXAS TWOSTEP

CHAPTER THREE:

THE VICTORIAN ERA

Written by Rick Archer 

 

 

Rick Archer's Note:  

As I mentioned in my Introduction, the Mystery of the Texas Twostep picks up immediately where the Year of Living Dangerously ends. 

Everyone knows about the frustration of coming into a movie that is halfway over, especially if the film has a complicated plot.  Should I assume that everyone has read my previous book?  Or do I throw in a recap as a way to bring new Readers up to speed?

At the risk of boring loyal Readers of my previous book, I think a recap is in order.

The star of my previous book was a woman named Victoria.  Since Victoria is a central figure in this book as well, a review of her story will help new Readers make better sense of the strange developments soon to take place.  

 

Life can only be understood backwards; but it must be lived forwards.
    
 
-- Soren Kierkegaard

It must be disconcerting to encounter two totally different versions of Rick Archer.  In a sense, there are two writers of this book.  One is the hapless fool who stumbles from one misadventure to the next.  The other is the somewhat wiser old man who breaks in to to put things in perspective via the gift of Hindsight.  That is why I admire Kierkegaard's quote so much.  The Reader can assume the 'hapless fool' is Rick Archer living his life forward while the 'wiser old man' is Rick Archer looking backwards.

I have a favorite saying, 'Time will Tell'This phrase deals with the curious nature of cause and effect.  Sometimes the 'Effect' is known immediately, but with less dramatic events such as a chance meeting, there may be a serious delay before the significance is understood. 

 

In the case of Victoria, I was dealing with the most complicated woman I have ever met.  Sometimes she was brilliant, other times she made the worst decisions I have ever witnessed.  Other than my parents, Victoria shaped the course of my life more than any other person.  Why is she so important?  Because much of what I write about Fate is based on conclusions gained from observations of her behavior.  However, I did not reach reach these conclusions as the behaviors occurred, but rather long after Victoria left my life.  That is why I feel fortunate to be in my 70s as I write about her.  Many of the stories I tell about Victoria did not make a bit of sense at the time, but later in life I was able to gain a better perspective.

I regret to say that I am not a mind reader.  It was difficult to comprehend Victoria's strange behavior.  As you read my story you will see what I mean.  Perhaps someday Victoria will write her own memoir.  Trust me, I will be the first to buy a copy.  I say this because there is no guarantee that my interpretation of her actions or mindset is correct.   So let me begin my story with an apology to Victoria.  There is a possibility that I misunderstood her motives.  All I can say is that I tried my best to understand her and that my account of what happened is truthful from my point of view.  As for her point of view, maybe someday Victoria will share it with me.  I would like that. 

 
 
 

LABOR DAY 1978 TO LABOR DAY 1979

THE VICTORIAN ERA

 
 

The 'Victorian Era' began with Victoria's appearance at my dance studio on the day after Labor Day 1978.  One year later, her reign as the Supreme Diva of Disco ended one day before Labor Day Weekend 1979.  Her demise was caused by extreme marital difficulties and problems caused by Urban Cowboy.

Saturday Night Fever debuted in January 1978.  I spent the first eight months of 1978 building my Disco program completely on my own.  I was very proud of my accomplishment at the time.  However, the day Victoria appeared, I discovered I still had a lot to learn.  She became my mentor.

There is a saying that behind every successful man is the woman who put him there.  That is true for me.  I am in great debt to Victoria.  She taught me how to run a dance studio.  The story of The Texas Twostep would not make a bit of sense without her. 

 

Victoria was like the cat who walks uninvited into your house and makes itself right at home.  Victoria reminded me of a favorite song, 'Year of the Cat'.   

She comes out of the sun in a silk dress Running like a watercolor in the rain Don't bother asking for explanations She'll just tell you that she came
In the year of the Cat     -- Al Stewart

Victoria was a stranger when she joined my class in progress one day after Labor Day.  She watched for five minutes, then proceeded to offer a suggestion on how to help the men improve.  I was not sure what she meant, so Victoria grabbed me and made me demonstrate her idea in front of the whole class.  The students were impressed.  So was I.  At the end of class Victoria asked if she could be my official assistant on Tuesday.  Given the dramatic impact she had made on my class tonight, I quickly assented. 

By the end of the month my new assistant was more important to the dance program than me.  Did I object?  No.  Why not?  Victoria was unbelievable. 

 

It is important to note that Victoria was married.  Michael, her husband, was a highly respected cancer researcher.  He was also a nice guy.  I liked him a lot.  One month after we met, Victoria signed Michael up for dance classes.  That is how I got to know him.  They had one child, a beautiful home, and lots of friends.  Michael understood that Victoria felt neglected.  Over the past few years, Michael had put in long hours at the laboratory.  Meanwhile Victoria sat at home every day and many a night twiddling her fingers.  Well aware that Victoria felt like she was wasting her life away, Michael was supportive of Victoria's initial interest in the dance studio.  He was pleased to see Victoria use her love of dance to snap out of her funk. 

From the moment she walked in, Sunshine Victoria treated my dance program as her own.  Not once did she ask to be paid.  She did this on a voluntary basis because she loved to dance.  She also thrived on the attention she was getting.  What was her motivation?  Victoria was tired of being a stay-at-home Mom all the time.  She loved organizing social events and dance parties, something I was not very good at.  Sensing my woeful inadequacy in such an important area, Victoria adopted my studio as her hobby and put her prodigious talent to good use.  For the first time in ages, Victoria felt like she was making an important contribution.  And contribute she did.  Over the final four months of 1978, Victoria doubled the size of my dance program. 

Beautiful and charismatic, Victoria turned heads wherever she went.  Victoria was tall (5' 7"), exquisitely well-curved with brown eyes and blonde hair.  In high school Victoria modeled and entered beauty contests.  She knew all the latest dance steps, was a cheerleader and Prom Queen.  As one might gather, Victoria was comfortable in the limelight.  She was a people person who craved popularity. 
 

In January 1979 Victoria picked up where she left off before Christmas.  Over the next four months Victoria doubled the size of my program again.  Thanks to her, I now owned the largest Disco program in the city.  However, I feared it could all be gone in a flash.  Why was that?  I had become far too dependent on Victoria's help.  Although I taught all the classes and people made their checks out to me, Victoria was the reason my students kept signing up for more classes.  What was her secret?  Right from the start, Victoria understood I was in the 'Boy Meets Girl' business.  This embarrassed me no end.  Why didn't I see this myself?  Silly me, I thought all I had to do was teach dance. 

Victoria was a master at the social side of my occupation.  She scheduled huge meet and greet parties that allowed students from different classes and different nights of the week to dance together.  Victoria was sheer magic with her emphasis on the 'Slow Dance leads to Romance' angle.  Thanks to Cupid and Victoria, people began falling in love right and left. 

Prior to the Victorian Era, people took dance lessons to meet the love of their life 'at the Disco'.  Thanks to Victoria, people began to realize they could also meet the love of their life 'at Rick's dance studio'.  The thought of meeting their next lover in dance class gave students an excellent reason to sign up for a follow-up class whenever their current class ended. 

 

Not once did I breathe a word about 'Contracts', standard procedure for most dance studios.  Nor did I need to use any sort of strong-arm persuasion.  Our students got in the habit of signing up for the next 'group class' of their own free will.  Why?  Singles were always the core of my program.  Although learning new patterns was a fun challenge, friendship was the real reason.  The chance to continue seeing their friends plus the chance to find their next love interest was the major incentive for singles to sign up for more classes.  For some students, taking classes and going out dancing with their friends became so important they would wrap their lives around my studio.

The funny thing about solutions is that they always look so obvious after you know the answer.  I wish I could take credit for the 'friendship' insight, but that would not be truthful.  The credit goes to Victoria.

 
 

THE EPIC LOSING STREAK
 
 

I had mixed feelings about Victoria.  One part of me was full of gratitude.  I would have never achieved this level of success without her help.  Given my high degree of respect, I made it a point to watch and learn from the master.  However, I was intimidated by her brilliance.  It was painful to realize she possessed social skills I could only dream about.  In my defense, there was a good reason why I was so inept. 

Due to my difficult childhood, I had grown up a loner.  After my parents got their divorce, money became a real problem for my mother.  In order to avoid paying her mounting overdue rent bill, she was forced to skip out once a year.  I had 11 homes in 9 years till I left for college.  These constant moves meant not making neighborhood friends.  Nor did I make many friends at school.  Thanks to a scholarship, I was the token poor kid at a rich kid's private school for nine years.  Just because I attended this posh private school did not make me part of my affluent classmates' social circles.  Pretty much ignored, I cannot remember a female classmate ever checking me out.  Sad to say, I graduated without a single date in high school. 

College was a near-repeat.  I dated very little in college.  Since Johns Hopkins was a men's school, finding girls to date was always a serious challenge.  I expanded my search by visiting other colleges in the area, but didn't get very far.  In particular I found it very difficult to approach college girls who were strangers.  Due to my lack of experience, the gift of small talk and flattery escaped me.  I botched so many early attempts that I developed a rather intense fear of rejection.  As my frustration mounted, I gave up and concentrated on my studies instead.  Unfortunately I paid a serious price for remaining a loner throughout high school and college.  By the time I entered graduate school, I was far behind my peer group in social maturity and dating experience. 

I entered the 'Clinical Psychology' program at Colorado State University.  I planned to become a therapist, but immediately ran into trouble.  After spending 23 years as a moody loner, I was great at academics, but clueless at social interaction.  The head of my department took a dim view of  my thin skin, my poor listening skills, and my bad habit of disagreeing with him during class.  Concluding my social acuity was far too mediocre to be of much use as a therapist, he sent me packing.  My professor implied that I flunked out due my shortcomings as a human being.  Seriously, how would you feel if someone said you were too emotionally disturbed to be of much use to your fellow man?  That was tough to handle.  I also managed to get my heart broken thanks to a deceitful girlfriend.  Failure in love, failure in career, I was a basket case when I returned to Houston. 

I was age 24 at the time.  Starting with my Freshman year in high school, over the past ten years I could count all my girlfriends on one hand.  There was Emily in my Freshman year of college.  She ran off with a rich sophomore after one month.  There was Arlene, my one bright star in an otherwise murky past.  She stayed with me for nine months.  I was an idiot to leave her behind, but I wanted to take my chances in graduate school.  As punishment, I met Vanessa, the single most deceitful woman I would ever meet in my life.  We all have our broken heart story, right?  I was so crushed by her betrayal, I was never the same during my final months at Colorado State.  On my long drive back to Houston, I reviewed my track record with women.  Pretty grim.  Other than Arlene, my luck with pretty girls was beyond abysmal.  Thanks to my fondness for gallow's humor, I gave my bad luck a name, the Epic Losing Streak.  Ten years and counting, no end in sight. 

Upon my return to Houston, I was so distraught over my problems in graduate school that I found myself unable to work up the courage to look for a new girlfriend.  For nearly two months all I did was sit in my apartment too fearful to go to a club and face further rejection.  One day I ran across a self-help book with an interesting suggestion.  Let's say I spotted a girl, but was too afraid to speak to her.  The book said the fastest polite way to get her in my arms was ask her to dance.  Considering I was currently speechless around pretty girls, that suggestion struck me as the light at the end of the tunnel.  Overwhelmed with loneliness, I began dance lessons in 1974.  Always fearful of rejection, I hoped to use dance as a way to get to First Base. 

 

Unfortunately, my Dance Project failed to work.  I continued to strike out with women due to my acute shyness.  However I stuck with the lessons anyway since it had become a hobby.  After a period of three and a half years I had learned enough about dance to be offered a part-time job as a Disco teacher.  Although I had a knack for teaching, I had trouble connecting to students on a personal level due my arrested social development.  That is when Victoria came to my rescue.  Although my social skills remained limited, she had more than enough popularity for the two of us.  

What would happen if Victoria left the studio?  Perish the thought.  I was no match for her skills Unfortunately, in December something happened that left her badly rattled.  Victoria had arranged a huge Christmas Party at our favorite Disco.  I estimate 350 people visited that night.  To Victoria's dismay, a woman named Joanne stole the show with her flashy partner dancing.  Considering Joanne was dancing with me at the time, Victoria was apoplectic.  Here I was, the beneficiary of all her valuable assistance.  After all the work she did to organize this party, it drove her crazy to see me turn around and help some stranger steal her glory.  Although I meant no harm, Victoria had a tough time forgiving me.  That was a turning point.  Victoria was never the same after that incident.

After the Holidays, Victoria took a turn for the worse.  Starting in January 1979, Victoria abused her authority by taking an unhealthy interest in my love life.  Victoria's reign of terror began with Joanne.  She was my Monday night assistant as well as the best female dancer at the studio.  Our dance students met at the Pistachio Club every Friday night, yet another one of Victoria's many bright ideas.  Crowds varied from 70-100.  Whenever Joanne and I danced, our students lined the floor to watch us.  Joanne made things worse by letting the world know she had a serious crush on me.  Given that Victoria expected the Disco Ball to revolve around her and no one else, she could barely control her temper.  Worse, Victoria feared being replaced if I were to start dating Joanne.  Nonsense.  Given Victoria's genius at promoting the business, I would be an idiot to replace my superstar with this sweet but meek and poorly educated young lady.  For some reason Victoria did not seem to realize she had nothing to worry about.  Instead she became intensely paranoid. 

 

Victoria also had her claws out for Patricia, my glamorous girlfriend.  Perhaps the Reader raises an eyebrow.  How exactly does a young man who has confessed to a lifetime of incompetence with women end up dating a beauty like Patricia?  To my great surprise, here in Year 14 of my Epic Losing Streak, my recent success as a dance teacher worked wonders for my confidence.  Surrounded by women at the studio, I made great strides in my relationships during 1978.  Now I was ready for Patricia, the toughest dating challenge of my life. 

Patricia was the mirror image of the poised, highly intelligent young ladies I had gone to school with at St. John's.  Born to prosperity, Patricia was a former debutante who aspired to marry a wealthy husband.  Considering I was not particularly well-paid, what on earth was Patricia doing with me?  It was a fluke, a very curious accident.  When we met at the studio, Patricia was surprised to discover I was just as educated as her.  Even better, the moment she learned I had gone to a rich kids school for nine years, Patricia [incorrectly] assumed I too was rich.

This was a perfectly logical mistake.  All the other men she had met from St. John's had been wealthy.  By the time she learned the truth, Patricia liked me too much to cut me loose like she should have.  Instead Patricia decided to make me rich.  Taking note of my excellent education, Patricia did everything in her power to persuade me to give up teaching dance and become a lawyer instead.  When I resisted, fireworks ensued.  Since we were well-matched in many ways, we might have overcome this issue if Victoria had not constantly interfered.  My relationship with Patricia was strange to say the least.   A rocky one as well.

 
 

THE TEMPTATION TRIANGLE
 
 

Imagine my dilemma.  Here at the start of 1979 I had three women chasing me.  I was reminded of the lyrics from 'Take it Easy', a song by the Eagles.

I'm a-runnin' down the road tryna loosen my load
I've got seven women on my mind
Four that wanna own me, two that wanna stone me
One says she's a friend of mine

Referring to my troublesome threesome as the 'Temptation Triangle', I did my best to play them against each other.  My dangerous game of Paper, Scissors and Rock worked fairly well until the day came when Victoria decided to start playing dirty. 

Why did Victoria resent Joanne and Patricia so much?  Due to her unhealthy obsession with my love life, at first I assumed jealousy was the reason.  However I changed my mind.  Popularity and universal acclaim was her goal.  Using her ability to organize large dance parties, Victoria was always the center of attention.  This is how she had built my program into a juggernaut.  In the process Victoria accomplished her objective to become the Supreme Diva of Disco.  She was widely admired for her beauty, dance ability and vivacious personality.  Now we come to the strange part.  Even though Victoria had all the fame and acclaim any woman could hope for, she feared losing her throne.  Why?  It started with 'Camelot', my nickname for the studio's weekly get-together at the Pistachio Club on Fridays. 

 

Camelot was another example of Victoria's genius.  Students from my various weeknight classes were invited to meet for an evening of dancing and romancing.  On any given Friday we had crowds of 70-100.  Back when I was her bumbling, stumbling sidekick, no woman bothered to give me a second glance.  Now, thanks in large part to Victoria's help, I was a star in my own right.  A solid year of non-stop dancing plus private dance lessons had worked wonders.  I had become a top-flight performer who commanded the attention of a legion of single women.  In addition, thanks to watching Victoria's social skills like a hawk over several months, I had learned my lessons.  For the first time in my adult life, women viewed me as someone to date, maybe even marriage material.  It had taken me quite a while to reach my potential, but better late than never.  Age 29 I found myself surrounded by women on a nightly basis.

Now that my popularity rivaled hers, Victoria realized her tutelage had backfired.  Having shed my sense of inferiority, I now held the Keys to her Kingdom.  Victoria felt insecure because she needed my cooperation in order to succeed.  Her paranoia made no sense because I needed her to succeed as much as she needed me.  What kept Victoria from seeing that her position as Queen of the studio was totally secure?  Beats the heck out of me.  I cannot begin to tell you how many times I tried to reassure this beautiful, multi-talented woman that I had no desire to kill the golden goose.  However, it did no good.  In March 1979 Victoria went on the warpath to eliminate her rivals.

Joanne and Patricia had a lot to do with her fears of being replaced.  Whenever our students met at the Pistachio Club, Patricia was the only woman more beautiful than Victoria.  Joanne was the only woman who was the better dancer.  Victoria was unwilling to settle for second best.  Furthermore, she knew Patricia hated her and wanted me to get rid of her.  Victoria was unwilling to tolerate any threat to her throne.  Fearful that Patricia would manipulate me against her, Victoria struck first.  She went about eliminating Patricia by spreading vicious gossip.  And while she was at it, she used her ability to use gossip to get rid of Joanne too. 

This led to an ugly surprise.  Once her two rivals were gone, Victoria was stunned to see other women line up to take their place.  This caused Victoria to panic.  Fearful of being replaced by a woman who posed an even greater threat, Victoria decided something had to be done.

 
 

VICTORIA
'S ACHILLES HEEL
 
 

Throughout high school and college, I had a fear that women saw me as a creepy loser.  This fear was greatly reinforced by my demise in graduate school.  This was the origin of my acute fear of rejection that tormented me upon my return to Houston.  I turned to dance lessons in search of a cure.  To my dismay, at first my solution failed to work.  I was not a natural dancer by any stretch of the imagination, so progress was slow. 

Fortunately, once I became a dance teacher, my dance career worked wonders for my confidence.  Like I say, even a turtle can get somewhere if you give him enough time.  It took four years, but once I got the hang of it, the ladies began to take notice.

Dancing six nights a week throughout 1978 helped me develop into one of the best Disco dancers in the city.  Each Friday when the studio met at the club, there I was showing off.  It is a well-known fact that women are attracted to excellence.  Using the dance floor as my stage, I could tell by the smiles of appreciative young ladies that they liked what they saw. 

Surrounded by smiling women every night of the week, I began to feel attractive for the first time in my life.  This was the moment I realized I would never have trouble meeting women again.  It was an amazing discovery.  Who would have ever guessed that learning to dance would one day cure 14 years of insecurity around beautiful women?

 

Unfortunately, I was not the only one who noticed the change.  I believe it was my unexpected emergence that unsettled Victoria the most.  Even if she got rid of Patricia and Joanne, there seemed to be no end to other potential rivals.  Not only were these attractive women interested in me, they were SINGLE.  To her dismay, this was the moment Victoria realized her status as a married woman left her at a serious disadvantage.  Her wedding ring had become her Achilles Heel. 

So what did Victoria decide?  My guess is she decided to have an affair with me.  Did I know this for a fact?  Well, not at the start.  There were three stages.  Stage One, Victoria tolerated Joanne and Patricia's place at the studio.  However, she constantly meddled and made things difficult for me and the two women.  In Stage Two, Victoria decided to clean house.  She was a master at using the telephone to turn public opinion against Joanne and Patricia.  A stay-at-home mother, Victoria amused herself by talking to her legion of studio girlfriends during the day.  Her malignant gossip stirred up so much hostility that Joanne could not cope.  She left the studio in March.  I was angry when Victoria sent her into exile.  This was a shame.  I had a soft spot for Joanne. 

Patricia got the same treatment, but she refused to quit.  This led to Stage Three.  Despite the fact that Victoria was married and I had a steady girlfriend, in May Victoria announced she loved me.  Frightened, I asked her to back off, so she did.  Were there sparks between us?  Yes.  We started as friends, but once Victoria began to pursue me, I was sorely tempted to say yes.  For the record, I did not want Victoria.  Now let me contradict myself and admit I wanted Victoria.  Of course I wanted Victoria!  I also wanted Sophia Loren and Raquel Welch.  There are certain women any red-blooded man would desire.  Victoria was one of them.  So, as we probe the depths of my mind, I admit I was strongly attracted to Victoria.  However, I did not feel guilty about my attraction.  To me, it was perfectly natural to desire a woman as beautiful and talented as Victoria.  However, at the same time I did not covet another man's wife, especially a man I liked.

At the end of June, Victoria tried again using a new tactic.  Ignoring the fact that Patricia was still in the picture, Victoria announced that her husband had given her permission to seek a relationship outside her marriage.  She referred to this as her 'European Arrangement'.

"I read an article that suggests 33% to 50% of French marriages include discrete affairs.  The tacit, but widely-accepted rules state that as long as the players promise their affairs will remain invisible, it is permissible."

 

At that thought, I began to tremble.  Despite her wedding ring, Victoria possessed considerable allure.  In a joking manner, Victoria loved to tell me about her high school heydays.  At any given time she had at least three, sometimes up to ten young men asking her out.  One look at her and I believed every word she said.  However, I was still dead set against having an affair.

First and foremost, I respected Michael too much to do this to him.  I did not believe for a moment that he had given her permission.  Furthermore, my childhood had been ruined thanks to my father's mistress.  Why do you think my father suddenly wanted a divorce?  The moment Dad married the bitch [pardon my French], she persuaded him to abandon me.  Meanwhile, my mother had a nervous breakdown after the divorce.  There I was, 9 years old, an unstable mother and no father at all.  More or less on my own from that point on, I turned into a moody loner with low self-esteem.  Now you know why they threw me out of graduate school.  I was too screwed up to be of much help to anyone else.  Thanks, Dad.

Victoria had a daughter named Stephanie.  Realizing Stephanie could very well face the same trauma that had ruined my childhood, I told Victoria I refused to have an affair.  That is when Victoria changed tactics.

"I am not sure my marriage is worth saving.  Michael isn't sure either.  He and I are leaving this afternoon for our Fourth of July trip.  We have agreed to have a long talk at some point.  When I return from my trip, I will explain what we have decided to do about our marital problems.  But first I want to make sure of your interest because I expect to be free soon."

Hmm.  What would I do if Victoria separated from her husband?  I did not see that one coming.  Victoria's declaration that she expected to be free soon hit like a tidal wave. Caught off-guard, I said something foolish. 

"There will be no sneaking around, but if you decide to separate from her husband, yes, I would pursue a relationship.  In fact, if things work out, you are welcome to move in with me."

 

In Hindsight, that was a pretty dumb thing to say.  In my defense, I was not the first man to ever have his conscience and libido fight a vicious civil war.  That moment led to one of the great mysteries of my life.  While Victoria was gone on her vacation, I did a lot of thinking.  Whenever I was not lusting for Victoria, I wondered why we couldn't be just friends.  Victoria had a perfectly good husband, a man who by all accounts treated her well.  Okay, yes, Michael was becoming increasingly grouchy at seeing her gone four nights out of seven, but who could blame him?  Why not cut back a little at the studio?  In other words, 'compromise' for the good of the marriage.  Up to this point, I had told Victoria we did not have to be romantically involved.  Just let me find a girlfriend and we can remain platonic partners at the dance studio.  She could have the studio and her husband at the same time.  It seemed like a win-win solution for everyone involved.

Unfortunately Victoria did not want to be 'friends'.  She said she was in love with me.  Since Victoria seemed unwilling to make her marriage work, I had foolishly left the door open ajar.  I would pay dearly for that mistake.

 
 

COLD FEET
 
 

In Hindsight, I confess I did not handle Victoria's "I expect to be free" properly.  So what if Victoria was beautiful and a great dancer, she was a married woman.  Even if Victoria was good for my business, why would I seemingly welcome her advances?  This is a very sensitive subject, so let me explain.  I did not encourage Victoria to leave her husband.  But I knew they were having marital problems.  If Victoria wanted out, since we had so much in common, I would be foolish not to show interest. 

Now for a twist of Fate.  While Victoria was gone over the July 4th holiday, Patricia and I entered a dance contest.  When a drunk woman lost her balance on the dance floor, she put her hand on my back in an attempt to regain her balance.  Her shove caused my elbow to catch Patricia right in the mouth, splitting her lower lip in the process.  With her face covered in blood, I took Patricia to the restroom.  It was a bizarre accident to be sure.  Humiliated, disfigured, full of pain and deeply frustrated, Patricia abruptly broke up with me when we reached her apartment later that night.  Who could blame her?  Thanks to Victoria's constant meddling, our relationship had been on life support for some time.   Given that this bizarre accident felt like a very bad omen, I decided our breakup was for the best.

After the breakup, I was free to date whomever I wished.  I had a list of candidates, but hesitated.  Before starting something new with another woman, I decided to wait for Victoria's return and see if she was sincere about her promise to leave Michael.  If Victoria was free, I would be hard pressed to find a woman superior to her.  I had known Victoria for ten months at this point.  Talented, warm, sexy, a fabulous dancer, Victoria was the woman of my dreams.  Given her business sense and dance ability, she fit my life like a glove.  So, if Victoria was available, of course I was interested in dating her. 

In Hindsight, I should have looked for the new girlfriend when I had a chance.  When Victoria returned to Houston after her trip, I expected she would follow through on her flowery promises to seek a romance.  Guess again.  Instead she pulled the rug out from under me.  Thanks to a stern lecture from her father during her vacation, Victoria developed a strong case of Cold Feet.  Victoria claimed she was still interested in me, but needed time to think about it.  I was so angry.  This felt like the proverbial bait and switch.  Promise me a rose, lead me by the nose, then leave me hanging.  Thanks a lot.  Profoundly embarrassed by her switcheroo, I suggested we stick to being friends and let me move on.  And what did Victoria say to that?

"Oh no, Rick, you need to stick around.  My feelings for you are too strong.  You owe it to me to be patient while I sort out my future.  I would prefer you not date anyone else."

 
 

THE INFAMOUS HUSBAND LIST
 
 

Victoria's Cold Feet was a major turning point in our relationship.  Unfortunately, this was shaping up to be a classic Love-Hate relationship.  I did not appreciate being jerked around nor did I like being told to wait while she made up her mind.  Where did she get the nerve to tell me to avoid looking for a girlfriend?   Nor did I trust Victoria very much.  I had a hunch she was far more interested in fooling around than actually leaving her husband.  In addition I was still mad at Victoria for chasing off Joanne and Patricia.  I also disliked being bossed around regarding the dance program.  Due to my lack of experience at dealing with a strong woman, Victoria had a bad habit of asserting her will over me whenever it pleased her.  So why didn't I simply tell her to shove off? 

Due to her penchant for viciousness plus her octopus-like control of my dance program, I feared Victoria would leave the dance program if I stood up to her.  This was not a good time to be taking risks.  As one Disco after another closed thanks to the Urban Cowboy menace, I noticed that attendance had begun to drop in May and June.  I could help but worry what would happen if Victoria left now.  For this reason I chose to appear her rather than stand up to her. 

In mid-July one morning Victoria dropped a bombshell.  One morning she asked me to meet her at a coffee shop.  After we sat down, she handed me something she called her 'Husband List'.  Insisting that we review this List together, Victoria pulled out a pen, then used it as a pointer to go over the List one line at a time.  

 


  Victoria said her father greatly admired her husband.  In her father's eyes, Michael was a Prince among men while I was a playboy/gigolo who he was certain would use her, then discard her when I was ready.

  Victoria compared my socio-economic status to that of her husband.  I came in second.  Make that a 'distant' second. 

  Victoria compared the social status of my job to her husband.  Again I came in second.  Michael was a much-praised researcher in an important field while I was a lowly dance teacher on par with gypsies, tramps and thieves (according to her father).

  Victoria compared our educational background.  I came in second.  Her husband had a doctorate, I had a bachelor's degree.  Victoria almost added 'graduate school failure', but bit her tongue at the last second.  I got the point.

  Victoria compared our job stability.  I came in a poor second due to Urban Cowboy.  I could lose my dance job any day now. 

  Victoria compared our houses.  My house finished somewhere around 100 in a two-house competition. 

  Victoria compared our track record as husband.  Michael was rated as superior.  Beside my name was "does not apply". 

  Victoria compared our track record as father.  Michael was an excellent father.  Beside my name was "does not apply". 

 

Was I superior to Victoria's husband in any way?  No, not according to Victoria.  I was stunned by the utter cruelty of her ambush.  I was also furious.  Although I basically agreed with everything Victoria had written, was it really necessary to rub these shortcomings in my face?   If Victoria thought so little of me, then what was all this nonsense about separating from her husband?  Stop wasting my time!  Bitter towards Victoria for deliberately humiliating me, I slammed my hand on the table so hard I made the coffee spill.

"Damn it, Victoria, don't you have anything better to do than find new ways to insult me?  For crying out loud, if Michael is so much better at everything, then what do you want from me?  Why don't you just leave me the hell alone and get out of my life!?"

I was ready to call it quits right there, but Victoria said not so fast.  She used her importance at the studio to force me to continue discussing the possibility of a serious relationship.  I was incredulous.  Victoria had just made it clear that if I tried to walk away, she would withdraw her support at the studio.  As I had feared, Victoria was more than willing to use threats.  Well aware of her importance to my business, my hands were tied.

This Husband List marked a seismic shift in my attitude towards Victoria.  I knew Victoria craved comfort, security and wealth.  I also knew Michael could provide these things to a far greater degree than me.  So what prevented Victoria from following through on her own logic?  Any woman in her right mind could see that Michael was the better choice, so what was Victoria trying to accomplish with this bizarre holding pattern?  I thought of the lyrics from Diana Ross and the Supremes. 

"Set me free, why don't you, babe?  Get outta my life, why don't you, babe?  You just keep me hanging on."

What did Victoria want?  If forced to guess, Victoria wanted to be married to Michael and use me for entertainment.  Given that I held the key to her Disco fantasies, I was more or less a means to an end.  I understood that.  But what I did not understand is why Victoria felt the need to pursue a romance.  I was more than happy to make her Disco Dreams come true on a friendship and business basis.  So why deceive me into thinking I was more important than I really was?  Victoria was playing a very nasty game.  However, since I saw no easy way to extricate myself due to my economic dependency, I gritted my teeth and reluctantly continued to play along. 

For fear of retribution, I did not tell Victoria that her Husband List was the final straw.  Yes, I was sexually attracted to Victoria, but I was not remotely in love.  I could have been in love, but I did not trust her.  Why not?  BECAUSE VICTORIA'S DECLARATION OF LOVE MADE NO SENSE.  In a sense Victoria did me a favor with her Husband List.  Everyone says that Love does not have to make sense, but I disagree.  In my book, Love has to make sense.  After reviewing the Husband List, I could not fathom a single reason why Victoria would prefer me over Michael.  Okay, maybe Michael did something bad.  Cheating?  Drinking?  Gambling?  Bills?  Lying?  Nope.  Not once in ten months had Victoria suggested even the slightest shortcoming.  The only thing Victoria complained about was Michael's tendency to work too hard.  I was aghast.  Of course the man works long hours!!  How else can he afford to give Victoria her life of luxury?  And look how she repays him!  Indeed, I was so disgusted with this woman that the Husband List marked the end to any illusion that Victoria was the woman of my dreams.   I NO LONGER HAD THE SLIGHTEST DESIRE TO MARRY THIS WOMAN.

The thing is, I agreed with Victoria's List.  Michael was a great guy.  I liked him.  And I agreed with every one of her points.  Michael provided the status, affluence and security that Victoria craved.  In addition he was a great father.  Okay, so maybe Victoria was infatuated with me or more likely the world I inhabited.  However, I would never come in FIRST in her mind.  At best I was 'Mistress Material'.  Or maybe we should call it 'Mattress Material'.  I was unwilling to accept this role.  I wanted to find a woman who would put me FIRST.  But that would have to wait till later. 

Right now my priority was to protect my dance program.  I had seen what she did to Patricia and Joanne, so I knew what Victoria was capable of.  If I tried to remove Victoria by force, I would be taking a huge chance.  So I had a better idea.  The Husband List made it clear that Victoria was nowhere near as in love with me as she claimed.  Given that Michael was BY FAR the better choice, I decided that sooner or later Victoria was going to come to her senses and choose Michael.  Rather than break it off and risk infuriating Victoria, I decided to wait her out, sort of like they used to do with a medieval siege.  Time was on my side. 

So what happened next?  During July and August Victoria and I entered a period known as 'Car Talk'.  Victoria was gone from her home four nights a week.  She taught dance class on Tuesday and Thursday night.  She went dancing at Pistachio Club on Friday and Annabelle's on Sunday.  After we finished teaching class on Tuesdays and Thursdays, Victoria insisted that we sit in her car and talk things over.  Using me as a sounding board, Victoria began to actively discuss leaving Michael.  Why did she want to leave?  Because he was always mad at her these days.  Personally, I thought Michael had every right to be angry.  But did I say that?  No.  The less said, the better.  As I listened to her endless complaints, I tried to imagine what was going through Michael's mind.  Here we were sitting in Victoria's car in the dark late at night.  His wife was getting home at least a half an hour, more often one hour longer than necessary.  Big car, large inviting seats.  What the hell was going on in that car almost till Midnight?  We never kissed or touched during Car Talk, but how was Michael supposed to know that?  Why did Michael tolerate this?  Victoria's behavior had to stretch the limits of Michael's trust way beyond the breaking point.   There is a legal term, 'Alienation of affection'.  I am quite sure Michael blamed me for causing the breakdown of their marriage. 

 
 

THE DANCE CURSE
 
 

In August, Victoria and I had three accidents in a row while performing.  The strange thing is that each accident was due to a problem totally out of our control.  Let me add that these were SERIOUS accidents.  The first accident was caused when the rotating blade of a ceiling fan clipped her foot while she was upside down on my shoulders.  It took a miraculous save on my part to protect her.  Victoria narrowly escaped breaking her neck.  The second time she went flying through my arms thanks to her ultra-slippery, skin-tight new dance leotard.  Crashing head-first against a barrier, yet again Victoria narrowly escaped breaking her neck.  The third time Victoria nearly broke a spectator's neck with an accidental Karate Chop to the woman's jugular during a performance. 

The crowd surge behind a woman named Benita had pushed her onto the lip of the dance floor.  Victoria never saw her as she threw out her right hand to hit a pose known as the 'Explosion Position'.  It was horrifying to see the poor woman collapse to her knees and grasp her throat in pain.  Personally, for a moment there I thought the woman was dead.  And when I heard those gurgling, rasping sounds in her throat, emergency room here we come.  It took 10 minutes, but fortunately Benita recovered.

However, Victoria was never the same.  She fell to pieces afterwards, bawling hysterically in her car.  I felt a shudder inside.  Talk about a bad omen!  No matter how hard I had tried to avoid having any further accidents, this one happened anyway.  It felt like there was a dark cloud hanging over both of us. 

 

The following morning Victoria called me at home.  When she immediately began ranting about my 'Dance Curse', I could tell she had flipped out during the night.  Victoria knew about Patricia's busted lip plus a previous bizarre failure.  Given that the Karate Chop incident was my fifth performing accident in a row, Victoria accused me of being cursed.  Gee, thanks a lot.  But then Victoria decided she was cursed too.  Convinced her three accidents were a sign that God was angry at her, Victoria decided to chuck it all.  She was done with Annabelle's on Sunday, she done with dancing at Pistachio on Friday, she was completely done with performing, and she was done with our private lessons.  Then she summed it up. 

"I am done with dancing period.  From now on the only place I will dance is at the studio.  However I still want to teach on Tuesday and Thursday in September.  And don't get any ideas.  I still haven't made up my mind about your relationship."

I groaned.  Not only was Victoria determined to hang on to her classes, she also intended to keep me hanging on.  Sick to my stomach, I wondered how I would ever get rid of her.  That was not the only thing that bothered me.  The Karate Chop felt like a death blow for my dance program.  Disco was already on its death bed thanks to John Travolta's Country dance movie.  Now my so-called business partner was abandoning me at the worst possible time.  My gut warned me that losing Victoria's presence at the weekly social events would send a terrible message to the students.     Given how the story of the Victoria's lethal accident spread like wildfire, I feared people would take this as a sign that it was time to move on in September.  If Victoria was quitting, then maybe they should quit too.  That is why I was furious with Victoria.  Her timing could not be worse.   Since I expected her September classes would be small, what was the point of Victoria sticking around when it was obvious her heart was no longer in it? 

We needed to part, so let's get this over with.  

 
 

THE DANCE CURSE: FIVE ACCIDENTS IN A ROW
 
   080

Serious

Strange Accident
Dance Curse 5

 1979
  Victoria's inadvertent Karate Chop at Annabelle's nearly puts a spectator in the hospital.  This was the 5th serious dance accident in a row for Rick, 3rd in row for Victoria.
 
   078

Serious

Strange Accident
Dance Curse 4

 1979
  Victoria's Greased Lightning Disco pants cause her to go flying at Foley's and narrowly miss serious injury
   077

Serious

Strange Accident
Dance Curse 3

 1979
  When a ceiling fan blade nips Victoria's toes at the Lighthouse, Victoria narrowly misses breaking her neck.
 
   075

Serious

Telekinesis
Dance Curse 2

 1979
  When a drunk woman shoves Rick in the back during a dance contest at Spats, his elbow gashes the inside of Patricia's lower lip, thereby ruining the performance
 
   065

Suspicious

Cosmic Blindness
Dance Curse 1

 1978
  The Ritz Debacle is caused when the Ritz DJ loses his mind and turns out the lights during Rick's performance
 
 
 

RICK'S 'STAY WITH MICHAEL' SPEECH
 
 

I often wondered what Michael was thinking.  As if Victoria's frequent nocturnal absence was insufficient to drive Michael to madness, the Dance Curse had surely put more strain on their marriage.  I could just hear him screaming. 

"For Christ's sake, Victoria, will you please stop this idiotic dancing obsession of yours before you kill yourself?  Your daughter needs you at home, I need you at home.  I am begging you to quit the studio and try to make this marriage work again."

Did Michael really say that?  No, but I wished he did.  I suspect Victoria was very careful what she told me about Michael.  For that matter, I suspect she was equally careful in what she told him about me.  My theory is that Victoria had a different version for both men.  Since Victoria was able to keep us in the dark, this allowed her to play both men against the other.  As I said, Victoria was a fairly brilliant woman.  She was especially crafty when giving reign to her dark side.

I kept hoping Michael would put his foot down and insist Victoria quit the studio.  That way he could be the bad guy and spare me the trouble.  However, that never happened.  Either Michael spoke up and she defied him or Michael was too weak to put his foot down.  I will never know the truth.  What I did know is that the time had come for me to do it instead. 

 

On the Friday before Labor Day Weekend, I confronted Victoria at the coffee shop.

"Victoria, this Dance Curse is the final straw.  Between Urban Cowboy, Sunday's accident at Annabelle's and your decision not to join me at Pistachio tonight, the writing is on the wall.  Without performing, we have lost the tie that binds us.  Therefore, the time has come for me to step aside.  There's no reason for you to teach in September.  I will simply merge your small classes into mine.  The end of the Disco Era is upon us, so what is the point of continuing?   Besides, you said it yourself, there is no way I can match what Michael offers you.  You are the Golden Wife with the Golden Life.  I beg you to give Michael another chance."

Privately I thought Victoria should do the begging, but kept that to myself.  I thought I had made a good speech.  By claiming I was stepping aside for the good of her marriage, I hoped to make it easier for Victoria to do the right thing and leave the studio.  To be honest, I expected Victoria would agree.  However, I was wrong.  Victoria exploded in rage.

"Damn it, Rick, you just don't get it, do you!?!  My husband is sick of me, you idiot!!  Get it through your thick head that Michael doesn't want me anymore!  How am I supposed to give him another chance when the jerk keeps trying to shove me out the door?  If you're so damn smart, then you go talk to Michael and tell him to give me another chance!  I am desperate because he says I have burned my bridges.  There is a part of me that believes he actually wants me to move in with you."

 

I stopped breathing.  I did not realize the rift was that serious.  Does Michael really want Victoria to move in with me?  Is Victoria bluffing or telling the truth?  I hated to say it, but she might be right.  What man can tolerate two months of watching his wife flagrantly pursue her dance instructor?  What goes on at night when Victoria comes home one to two hours after classes have ended?  Victoria explained that it was all very innocent, that all we did was sit in her car talking (which was the truth).  But why should Michael believe that?  It might be true that Michael was so fed up with Victoria that he didn't want her anymore.  Well, that was Victoria's problem, not mine.  However, given her rage, I did not dare say that out loud and hope to leave the coffee shop alive.

"Then get a divorce, Victoria.  That's what grownups do when they have unhappy marriages.  You have a college degree and a teaching certificate.  Keep the house, get a job, receive child support for your daughter Stephanie.  You will do just fine.  After your divorce, come see me if you still want to.  We can talk about our relationship then [I wasn't serious].  But right now I am looking at three dance accidents in a row.  These accidents are not only frightening, they are weird.  Stuff keeps happening beyond our control.  To me, these bad omens suggest any future relationship is a big mistake.  Don't you see?  The Universe is telling us to walk away!  As far as I'm concerned, we are star-crossed lovers."

I was positive this argument would bring Victoria to her senses.  First her father had told Victoria it wouldn't work.  Now I was telling her it wouldn't work.  Even God was telling her it wouldn't work.  For crying out loud, read the damn tea leaves!  What more did Victoria need to see the light?

"I don't agree with your conclusion.  I still want to be a part of the studio, but right now I am very confused.  Michael says he wants to talk to me over the upcoming Labor Day weekend.  Stephanie is spending the weekend with a friend so we can be alone to hash things out.  Please don't force me to make any decisions until I have my weekend talk."

Oh no.  Not this again.  Why should I wait?  I wanted to tell Victoria to leave the studio in the worst way.  If so, there was little she could do about it.  What did I have to lose?  The energy on Friday nights was already down to a mere trickle and the diminished attendance in September would be equally depressing.  Thanks to her Karate Chop decisions, she already had one foot out the door, so why not put the other foot out as well?  Losing Victoria would not make enough difference to matter any more, so let's get it over with.

However, before I could speak up, Victoria said, "Look, Rick, you owe it to me to see what Michael has to say.  And you don't have the right to make me leave the studio before I'm ready."

That is when I hesitated.  Given her vast contributions to the program, I agreed with Victoria.  She deserved the right to leave on her own terms.  Since I expected her to depart of her own accord following her upcoming talk, I preferred to part on friendly terms. 

"Okay, Victoria, have your Labor Day talk with Michael and call me when you make your decision."

 
 
 

LABOR DAY 1979

THE VICTORIAN ERA COMES TO AN END
 

 

Victoria was fearful, beaten, and depressed.  Victoria interpreted the recurring Dance Curse catastrophes as a sign that God wanted her to change her ways.  Victoria was like the baseball player who has been hit in the face by a pitch and fears it will happen again.  Or call it PTSD.  Fearful of breaking her neck if she tried performing one more time, Victoria refused to take another risk.

Everything Victoria said made me sick to my stomach.  If Victoria was not so blind, she would realize God was actually telling her to leave me.  Not only that, without Victoria, the studio's social program was in serious jeopardy.  Victoria was the heartbeat, the leader, the Supreme Diva of Disco.  Ain't no sunshine when she's gone.  Victoria's bad news suggested the end of my Disco dance career would come a lot sooner than I had expected, a fear I was certain would come true.  

Victoria did offer one ray of hope.  She intended to talk it over with Michael over the Labor Day Weekend.  Maybe, just maybe, Michael could find a way to get his stubborn wife to give their marriage another try before it was too late.  That sounded like a good idea to me.  Since we had not crossed the all-important Forbidden Line, that was a distinct point in Victoria's favor.  The way she spoke about her upcoming talk with Michael, Victoria seemed willing to consider trying again.  Or maybe that was just my wishful thinking. 

Even if she did return to teach her two small classes in September, Victoria's power over me was gone.  Victoria was facing a deadly one-two-three punch.  The Dance Curse would probably finish her off, but if she rallied,  Michael was certain to furnish the death blow this weekend.  And if that didn't work, Urban Cowboy was an extinction-level-event.  Victoria had made it clear she had no interest whatsoever in Country-Western music or dancing.  Count her out.  Meanwhile the clock was ticking.  Based on the number of Discos that had closed during the Victorian Era, soon there would be no place for us to go dancing.  Without a Disco, her days as the Supreme Diva of Disco were over.  If the Dance Curse and Michael's demands did not finish her off, the Cowboy Curse surely would. 

Famous baseball player Yogi Berra once said it ain't over till it's over.  Nonsense.  I was convinced Victoria was finished.  This was the end of the studio's Victorian Era, a memorable year, a crazy year, the Year of Living Dangerously.   

 
 

 


THE TEXAS TWOSTEP

CHAPTER FOUR:  LABOR DAY WEEKEND

 

 

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