MYSTERY OF THE TEXAS TWOSTEP

CHAPTER SIXTY one:

LIMBO

Written by Rick Archer 

LIMBO MONTH seven
Monday NIGHT, JANUARY 14, 1980

ONE AND DONE
 

The easiest way to learn how to lead a woman through various patterns is to have it explained.  Since 'Leading' is a difficult skill to learn, men need lessons more than women.  'Leading' is a form of gentle judo.  Using a twist of his shoulders or a gentle tug on her arm at the right time, a man can guide a woman's momentum in a new direction.  Once a man learns to lead well, women will seek him out.  Women would rather not be forced to 'Think' when they dance.  A woman prefers to turn her brain off so she can listen to the music and enjoy the sensation of being taken for a pleasant ride. 

Unfortunately, few men Lead well enough for this to happen.  In order to dance with men who lack this unique skill, a woman can compensate by recognizing what he wants her to do.  This is why women take dance classes.  A dance class allows a woman to familiarize herself on what to expect on the dance floor and react accordingly. 

As things stood, Old Style Western dancing was so easy, the women had no trouble guessing what the man was trying to lead.  After all, how much skill does it take to make a woman go backwards all night long?  Bottom line, I needed to be needed.  The only way to accomplish that was to make things difficult.  The more difficult the move, the more my students would rely on me to explain lead/follow techniques.  That is why I was so desperate to invent patterns to make things more complicated (and more interesting). 

One of the triumphs of Week One was the discovery that I no longer needed to seek new dance moves at Cowboy.  Why bother?  There were none to be found.  Fortunately I discovered I had an ability to create Western patterns on my own.  I intended to pass these moves off to my students as the latest and greatest in Western dancing.  I suppose this was a form of 'Fake it till you Make it', but I calmed my conscience by reminding myself that I had done this same thing with Disco countless times. 

In last week's Intermediate class, not once did anyone object to my concoctions.  Which is why I was so rattled by Hank's bitter warning that I had no right to alter the genetic code of Western dancing.  A confrontation like this had never happened before.  And you know what?  It would probably never happen again.  Hank was a dedicated practitioner of the Old Country Style, claiming that he had been dancing Country for 50 years.  Then Hank added that he did not need lessons.  In that case, what was he doing in my class?  Given that his presence was a fluke, I doubted I would ever face a man like that again.  And even if I did, I was prepared to handle it.  All I had to do was ask the ladies to back me up. 

So the fear of running into someone who knew more than me evaporated.  Unfortunately, it was replaced by a different fear, the problem of One and Done.  As things stood, my Intermediate class represented the next step in the Evolution of Western Dancing.  I now had enough material to offer an Intermediate class in March to my 200 January beginners.  However, I was worried that only a handful men would be interested.  Why?  Any man who took my Beginner class would automatically become one of the better dancers on a Western dance floor.  That is because the New Style Country that I taught was superior to the Old Country Style.  That was good news.  But there was also bad news.  Where was the incentive to improve further? 

Let's say a baseball team wins consistently by scores of 6-2,  5-3, and so on.  There are some close games, but the players rarely lose.  Where is the incentive to try harder and win 10-1, 12-0?  Is a killer instinct necessary when a man is already better than 90% of his competitors on the dance floor? If a man takes my Intermediate class, what does he gain by upgrading his advantage from 90% to 95%?  What is that extra 5% going to get him?  Not much.  He is already better than practically every guy in the club, so why invest $25 and two months of his time?  His time would be better spent going straight to the club and asking ladies to dance.

Perhaps the Reader thinks I worry too much.  Maybe so.  In fact, I agree with you.  But what choice did I have?  I was not born with dance talent like Lance Stevens.  Well aware that I was a serious underdog in a business for which I was not naturally suited, I had to find an edge.  I suppose this is where the chip on my shoulder came in handy.  I learned long ago I had to overcome my shortcomings by working harder.  Teaching dance was the first real success I had experienced since being thrown out of graduate school.  Given that I loved teaching so much, I was willing to work overtime to take advantage of this golden opportunity.  That is why I analyzed everything to the nth degree.

A man who was a very good Disco dancer could impress a woman with his skill.  Unfortunately, even with my improvements, Western Dancing was still so easy I could not imagine impressing a woman with an extra Polka move.  Try as I might, I could not see any compelling incentive for a man to improve past my Beginner class.  At this stage of the game, I could not identify an obvious incentive to compel men to take my Intermediate class.  If so, Western dancing might turn out to be an empty well after all.  Unless I could think of a compelling reason to persuade men to improve further, One and Done would rule the day. 

Monday NIGHT, JANUARY 14, 1980

LYNETTE'S SECRET
 

The second week of my Monday Night Intermediate 'Die Hard' class went very well.  Having realized I could use my own imagination to restock the cookie jar, I no longer needed to hoard my limited material.  Infused with a sense of abundance, I taught at the pace my former Disco Superstars were used to.  In fact, just to spoil them a little, tonight I taught more Polka moves than the men could absorb.  They complained I was moving too fast, but deep down they liked being challenged.

Why did the women like my class so much?  Because they liked dancing with their classmates.  For one thing, the men in my class led their moves so well, the women could follow without thinking.  In fact, these moves were so easy, if led well, the ladies could follow without ever having seen them before.  So why take the class?  'The Recognition factor.'  This would allow the women to dance with a handsome stranger who did not know how to lead. 

Some women have a gift that allows them to skip taking dance classes.  They have the innate ability to react so quickly that they can recover from a man's mistake.  If a woman is a lone wolf like Joanne, she can go dancing at a club and learn to Follow that way.  So far, Western Dance lessons were pretty much a waste of time because there was little to learn.  However, at the Intermediate level, the moves got tricky enough that a woman finally needed to pay attention.  My students formed a Wolf Pack.  They practiced together in class, then they practiced again at Cowboy after class.  Women like to go dancing with a group of men they know.  That is because strangers are usually much harder to follow.  If I can get a group of students accustomed to dancing together, tight-knit bonds form over time.  The 'group spirit' gives everyone a reason to want to continue taking lessons as a way to see their friends.  That is what I had with these former Disco Superstars.  They loved to dance so much and they loved each other so much that they insisted on continuing even when Disco disappeared.

Now that I gotten past my bad attitude, it was time to get back into the Boy Meets Girl business.  Knowing how the attendance increased whenever I joined the fun, it was time to resume my leadership role.  During class I made sure to invite everyone to join me at Cowboy.  In addition I promised to dance with every lady who joined us.  The group rewarded me with generous smiles.  Now that I had given my Intermediate students exactly the class they wanted, all was forgiven, everything was cool.  The Fright Night Conspiracy was a thing of the past.

When we got to Cowboy, I made no further attempt to watch the other dancers.  Instead I concentrated on dancing with my ladies as often as possible.  To my distinct pleasure, as we danced I came up with several new ideas to explore.  This was excellent news.  I had hoped that new moves would emerge spontaneously if I practiced enough.  Back in the Disco Era, the harder I worked, the luckier I got.  I was pleased to see History repeat itself.

The ladies in my class were not supposed to know, but I had a secret reason to dance with each of them.  I was feeling pretty lonely these days.  The more women I danced with, the less I thought about Jennifer.  Eventually I got around to dancing with Lynette.  Why was she last?  Lynette was the most popular lady, so there was always a line of men waiting to dance with her.  Since I was unwilling to get in line, I caught up with her when the crowd thinned out.  The moment I saw Lynette glance at her watch at the end of a song, I asked her to dance. 

I struck up a conversation as we danced.  "I am curious to know your opinion of the new Western Era."

Lynette frowned, but said nothing. 

Raising an eyebrow, I commented, "Is something bothering you?  Whatever it is, you can tell me."

"Well, it's not all bad.  I liked your class tonight.  Better than last week.  Actually your class went very well.  It was like old times, lots of energy, lots of dancing to music.  You seemed to be in a good mood.  I also noticed your stupid jokes are back.  "

I smiled.  I had told the joke about the dance teacher who taught a dance move wrong to a lawyer.  His bad advice caused the man to fall and injure both legs.  When the lawyer threatened to sue, the dance teacher replied, 'Don't bother. You won't have a leg to stand on.'  ha ha

"Did you like the joke?"

"No, it was awful."  Lynette smiled to let know me she was teasing.  "However it was nice to see you get some of your old mojo back."

"Yeah, I am feeling better because I think this Western thing is going work out after all.  I wasn't sure there for a while.  But what do you think?"

"I'm sorry, Rick, I don't like to rain on your parade, but to be honest, this country dancing is really boring!   It is so bad I don't even feel like going dancing anymore unless it is with my friends from our Monday class." 

I stopped breathing.  Here we were one week into the Western Era and Lynette had just uttered the word I feared the most, 'Boring'.  Feeling anxious, I wanted to hear more.  When the song ended, I said, "Let me buy you a beer, Lynette.  I want to know why you feel this way."

Lynette said okay, so I found a seat where we could talk, then placed an order with a waitress.   The waitress was back in a flash, so we clinked bottles and got down to business.  "Okay, you say the dancing is boring.  Can you explain why?"

With a big sigh, Lynette began. 

"You have no idea how ridiculous it is to dance backwards all night long.  Whenever I come here by myself, that's all the men know how to do.  One guy after another, I dance backwards to the entire song with some guy's arm around my neck.  Plus half the men don't even know how to Polka.  Thank God you are teaching the men to do things differently.  By the way, I loved that Circle Turn you taught in class tonight.  Finally something tricky for a change.  That move made my night.  Plus your new Polka moves are clever.  They aren't difficult, but they are a big improvement over dancing backwards the entire song.  Finally some variety."

Lynette took a sip of beer, then continued. 

"The problem is that I am spoiled.  I spent an entire year dancing Disco.  A girl really has to stay on her toes because the pace is so fast.   I often left the floor breathless and dizzy, but that didn't bother me.  No matter how ragged I was, I was happy.  The moves were complicated, there were lots of double turns and even some acrobatics if the floor wasn't crowded.   Here I leave the floor and I haven't even broken a sweat.  There is absolutely no challenge to this.  If things don't improve, I think I will quit and join a jogging club."

"Are you the only one who thinks like this?"

"Heaven's no!  All the girls say the same thing.  So does Jerry.  There is a lot of dissatisfaction among the Die Hards.  As it stands, a night of Twostep and Polka consists of two hours of going round and round in a circular path.  Even if the guy knows how to lead your transition pattern, we still end up dancing the same five or six steps over and over.  If a stranger asks me to dance, most of the time I find myself going backwards.  Most men could care less to learn anything beyond the basic step.  Back when I asked you to teach Western in November, I assumed Western would be challenge.  I cannot begin to tell you how disappointed I was to discover there is nothing to it.  Now that the initial challenge has disappeared, I can sleep-walk through every song.  The dancing is pleasant, but I wouldn't call it exciting. 

Thank goodness for Cowboy.  Things are much worse over at Broncos near my apartment.  The thick cigarette smoke is unbearable to a non-smoker like me.  There I am out on a hot, crowded floor.  I am constantly being bumped into by sweaty, rude people who don't know what they are doing.  No one ever apologizes.  The heat, the smoke, and the rudeness is tough to bear.  Plus all the drinking.  There are countless beer bottles wherever I look.  In addition I have realized rednecks are not the nicest people in the world.  When guys get drunk, sometimes they turn hostile.  Since people are always bumping into someone, there are constant arguments on the dance floor.  I worry some night one of these collisions will erupt into a fight.  Basically I have concluded this new Western scene is nowhere near as much fun as I had hoped."

"Is Cowboy an improvement over Broncos?"

"Cowboy is so much better."

"Why?"

"Maybe because they charge more for drinks.  A lot of cowboys are either cheap or dead broke.  However, the businessmen who come here don't even blink.  But mostly I think the music and the ambience attract a different crowd."

"What do you mean?"

"Rednecks like angry music, yuppies like happy music.  But even Cowboy is losing its appeal for me.  I hate crowded dance floors.  Every week there are more couples out on the floor.  The floor is so crowded the pace is pretty slow."

"If the dancing is so boring, then why are the clubs so crowded?"

Lynette took another sip and thought about it for a moment. 

"Right now Western dancing is brand new.  There are a lot of people in Houston who have never danced Country before.  Urban Cowboy has inspired countless people who have never danced in their lives to give Western dancing a try.  I don't think the newcomers mind the slow pace.  Since they have no idea how much better things were back when Disco ruled the world, they don't have a bad attitude like me.  These newcomers have fun because the dancing is something of a challenge for them.  However, to the dancers in our group, this new scene is barely tolerable.  Western dancing is so damn easy I feel a constant regret over what we lost.  That is why I feel so bitter.  And I'm not alone.  None of us can forget how much fun we once had with Disco.  The boredom is driving us all crazy, so I worry that my friends from class will be moving on.  I wish I didn't have to say this, but I miss Disco so much!"  

I nodded.  Having listened to Lynette, I realized my Die Hard students felt the same way as me.  We all missed the energy of Disco.  Now that Disco was gone, I imagined there was a legion of ex-Disco Dancers who were very unhappy.  Thank goodness I decided to take a huge risk and teach this Intermediate class in January.  If I had waited till March, people like Lynette might have already checked out and moved onto something else.  Based on what she said, I got the sense that my Intermediate class was the only thing giving hope to my ex-Disco dancers.

Lynette did not say it out loud, but I got the message.  "Please make Western more interesting or we will quit dancing."  Now I knew why Jerry was so insistent that I teach this class.  Jerry, Lynette and the rest of the students would be patient for now, but they were counting on me to make it better 'or else'.  Oddly enough, I thought of Hank from last week's Confrontation.  Hank had evoked a pang of guilt when he asked what gave me the right to tamper with 100 years of Texas Dance Tradition.  After listening to Lynette, I had a funny feeling Western Dancing was about to change whether Hank approved or not.  Since the only way to keep my favorite students happy was to make Western dancing more interesting, that was exactly what I intended to do. 

What a mess.  The Death of Disco in Houston had left countless dancers with no choice but to invade the Western Clubs and impose their will on the Old Country dancers.  Why do you suppose there was an outcry of 'Disco Sucks!' and 'I was Country before Country was Cool'?  Because Old Country was very threatened by the enemy.  The Disco people were bitter and Old Country was bitter too.  However I was thrilled.  From the ashes of Disco's funeral pyre there was growing pressure to change the face of Western dancing.  Consequently I no longer felt guilty about my plans to innovate.  Tomorrow morning I would see Glen.  With his help, I would crank out as many new Western patterns as I possibly could.

TUESDAY NIGHT, JANUARY 15, 1980

RE-EVALUATING MY DECISION

 

It was Tuesday Night, January 15.  As expected, more hissy sparks flew between Victoria and Miss Moneypenny.  These two women definitely did not like each other.  I taught an Advanced Disco class at 7 while Victoria taught a Beginner Disco class in another room at 7.  These were our only remaining Disco classes.  With five Beginner Western classes and one Intermediate, I was down to 8 classes in January.  During the heyday of Disco, I taught 15 classes a week and Victoria taught 5.  Quite a difference.  With a frown, I decided not to think about it.  At 8 pm, Victoria participated in my Beginning Western class.  For the second week in a row, Victoria was reluctant to make herself known.  Saying nothing, Victoria was content to blend in and observe. 

When we met in her car after class, Victoria launched into her usual tale of woe. I could not help but think our relationship was not exactly my idea of boyfriend-girlfriend.  Victoria was almost completely absent from my life.  I was not allowed to go to her house.  Nor could she meet me somewhere for fear of the private eye her husband had theoretically hired to take pictures.  Was she putting me on or was that the truth?  How should I know?  I only had Victoria's word for it.  Either way, Tuesday night was our only chance to see each other.  Saturday and Sunday were out for the time being.  We did talk on the phone, usually late at night.  Was she checking up on me?  Probably, but now that Jennifer was gone, I didn't care.  The funny thing is that she never asked how I was doing. 

Sick of being taken for granted, I deeply resented giving up my freedom.  I was not her boyfriend, I was her caretaker.  As I listened to Victoria drone on, I was harboring a guilty secret.  During my conversation with Lynette last night, it had taken every ounce of willpower not to ask her out.  Victoria must have read my mind. 

"Right now you are the only friend I have.  Don't forget you promised to stay loyal to me." 

I groaned.  "Loyal" was Victoria's way of saying "Don't you dare touch another woman!" 

After reassuring her I intended to keep my word, Victoria returned to her usual topics.  I half-listened and made sure to nod periodically, but mostly I thought about my promise to stay by her side for the near future.  As Victoria had said last week, "After all we have been through, the least you can do is stand by me."  Those words had rattled around in my brain all week long.  In the months following Doorstep Night, Victoria had used blackmail threats to bully me.  Now thanks to the Western Era her threats were meaningless.  Considering I had been her lackey dating all the way back to July, why would I willingly offer to stick around?  

Karma.  Convinced we were linked by Fate, I believed I had a Karmic Duty to protect Victoria.  Why?  I believed Victoria had been put in my life to help me develop my career.  I owed my dance studio, or what was left of it, to Victoria.  However, in the process, Victoria went crazy.  I still could not believe Victoria had thrown away her husband to be with me.  Ever since, I had been looking for a way to atone for my involvement in her horrible mistake.  Over the past year there were many times I hated Victoria.  However, to my surprise, my prevalent feeling had turned to sympathy.  Given the heavy price that Victoria had paid, the least I could do was honor her request to stick around while she sorted out her life.

Victoria had once been the most dynamic woman I had ever met.  Now she had turned into this sad, helpless shell of her former self.  Victoria said she had no one to turn to but me.  Was that the truth?  Probably.  Although I grew weary of listening to Victoria claim how I had ruined her life, I understood that she needed me.  That said, I continued to be irritated at how little attention Victoria paid to me.  Now that she had me, she didn't want me.  She was so distraught over her impending divorce that she barely paid attention to me unless it was to talk about her problems.   Was I lonely?  Yes.  I was desperately lonely.  But I had given my word not to date other women and I intended to keep my word.  Was I being stupid?  After all, there was no guarantee that my belief in a Karmic Duty was correct.  But then I corrected myself.  Even if there was no such thing as Karmic Debt, my conscience insisted I do the right thing.  However, that did not mean I had to be happy about it.

There was something else that bothered me.  I still thought it was very strange that Jennifer had chosen Jeff over me.  I could be wrong, but was Jennifer a victim of Cosmic Blindness?  Not only was Jennifer in love with me, we were perfect for each other.  She knew it and so did her father.  And yet Jennifer turned her back.  One reason for my suspicion of Supernatural involvement was the timing.  How convenient that Jennifer would slam the door shut at the same moment Victoria begged me not to leave.  Was this a meaningless coincidence?  Or was it all part of the Cosmic plan?  If Jennifer had given me a second chance, I never would have agreed to give her up.  However, now that Jennifer was gone, the urgency to obtain my romantic freedom was removed.  Mind you, by committing to Victoria, I understood full well I was putting my head back in the tiger's mouth.  With my fortunes tied to her mercurial personality, I was affected by everything she did.  I strained as hard as I could to find the silver lining in this unwanted obligation, but found little to cheer me up.  On the other hand, I was not in great pain.  I was just lonely.  If nothing else, I suppose Victoria's strange ways made for strange days and interesting stories. 

FIGHTING TEMPTATION

 

There was an unspoken context to last night's conversation with Lynette.  Neither of us were willing to acknowledge it openly, but we had developed a strong attachment.  Lynette's boyfriend worked on a off-shore oil rig.  He was gone for three weeks followed by two weeks at home.  Lynette did not like this arrangement at all.  Calling it unnatural, Lynette said she used dance class and Cowboy to help deal with her loneliness.  Based on her wistful expression, I had a hunch Lynette was ripe for the picking.  Loneliness does that to people.  If anyone should know, that would be me.  However, I had given my word to Victoria.  Who knows, when I finally got my freedom, maybe Lynette would still be around.  I tried not to think about it.  Otherwise I would get more depressed than I already was.

This was ridiculous.  I am 30, single and very lonely.  So do something about it!  There is no ring on my finger and I am surrounded by a legion of single women every night of the week.  Given how lonely I am, I am constantly at risk of losing my self-discipline.  The slightest spark could create a raging bonfire, if not Lynette, then someone else.  Adding to the problem, these women had no idea of my secret vow to play nursemaid to a nutcase.  Under the mistaken impression that I was available, these aggressive women showed me no mercy.  From where they stood, I was tall, muscular, and reasonably attractive.  Not only could I dance, I was obviously employed.  Plus I was single with no girlfriend in sight.  Definitely worth a closer look. 

Every night there was at least one lady who smiled and signaled interest.  I was dying to reciprocate.  However, due to this bizarre commitment I made to Victoria, I voluntarily kept my hands to myself.  How hard would it be to sneak around?  Effortless.  Nevertheless, I had promised to behave.  In fact, I passed my first real test with Lynette last night.  However, I had been upset ever since.  It is one thing to be lonely if one is isolated.  It is another thing entirely to be surrounded by so much temptation and unable to taste the candy.  I was in agony! 

But it was even worse than that.  WHAT IF I AM WRONG?  Day after day I debated the sanity of my decision.  I was basing this Guardian situation strictly on the belief that this is what God wanted me to do.  Ultimately, it all boiled down to one thing: Victoria's Destiny Letter from last October.

"I know too that our relationship hasn't always been easy, but I have always felt that our being together was Destiny.  It's like no matter what happens, the Universe keeps pushing me in your direction and I can't seem to let go of you." 

I hated to admit it, but I agreed with Victoria.  Not only was the Universe pushing her in my direction, I felt like the Universe was pushing me in her direction.  With her Blackmail Threat ancient history, I had the power to get rid of Victoria with complete impunity.  And yet I hesitated.  Why?  Jennifer's Cold Feet.  I had no logical reason to feel this way, but my intuition was convinced that God had sent Jennifer away specifically because he wanted me to give Victoria my full attention.  Victoria never had the slightest idea my belief in Fate was the real reason I remained in her life.  I cooperated due to my belief that this was God's Will.  Saving her marriage might be hopeless, but I had made a solemn vow and I intended to keep it.   

Serious