WHAT IS NEW AT SSQQ
Written by Rick Archer

This is the December 2007 issue of the SSQQ Newsletter.

The December 2007 issue is extensive.  I guess that is an understatement.  There are twenty stories.  That's right - Twenty.  And you know what?  Every single article is fun.   This is one of the most entertaining Newsletters I have put out.  Please Enjoy!

This story is written by Rick Archer

Starting in 2004, SSQQ has taken two cruises a year.  One cruise is our beloved dance cruise around the Caribbean while a second cruise is booked to a "destination".  

In 2004 we went to Mardi Gras in New Orleans.  In 2005 we went to Alaska.  In 2006 we went to New England.   In 2007 we went to Hawaii.  In 2008 we try our most ambitious trip yet - the SSQQ Cruise to Greece.
 

The 2008 Greece Trip at a Glance: Sunday, July 20th - Sunday, July 27th Aboard Royal Caribbean's Navigator of the Seas Day One: Rome, Italy -- Depart at 5:00 pm Day Two: Sicily, Italy-- 10:00 - 6:00 pm Day Three: Cruising the Mediterranean Day Four: Athens, Greece -- 7:00 am - 7:00 pm Day Five: Ephesus, Turkey -- 7:00 am - 7:00 pm Day Six: Heraklion, Crete -- 7:00 am - 3:00 pm Day Seven: Cruising the Mediterranean Day Eight: Rome, Italy -- Arrive 5:00 am Contact Marla Archer for more information at marla@ssqq.com or phone her 713 862 4428

As I am sure most of you remember from your Ancient History courses, as far as the Western Civilization is concerned, Greece is where it all began.  

The people of the region attempted to explain the world through the laws of nature. They made important discoveries in science. They developed democracy, where people govern themselves rather than being ruled by a king. The Greeks also valued beauty and imagination. They wrote many stories and plays that continue to be performed today. The ancient Greeks developed a great many traditions that we take for granted without even thinking about their origins (for example, the Marathon and the Olympics). 

This are the reasons why Greece is often known as the Cradle of Western Civilization.

If it were not for the Greeks, we would not have the Democracy we take for granted.  If it were not for the Greeks, we might be speaking Persian today.  If it were not for the Greeks, we would not have the Trojan War, The Odyssey, the Spartan 300, Greek Mythology, Greek Philosophy, Greek Drama, or the Olympic Games.  Obviously Greece has had a profound effect on the course of Western history.

The Civilization of ancient Greece flowered more than 2500 years ago.  Greece is an extremely mountainous country that makes it very difficult for agriculture.  Consequently the ancient Greeks were forced to adapt.  They became a sea-faring nation.  They also developed a passion for knowledge and culture.  As a result, Greece became the most advanced scientific country of its time.  Known for its advanced mathematics and astronomy, Greece is the country that gave us Archimedes, Ptolemy and Pythagoras.  Known for its medicine, Greece gave us Hippocrates and Galen. 

Perhaps what Greece is most famous for is its Philosophers.  The ancient Greeks seem to have been a most inquisitive group of people.  Socrates, Plato, and Aristotle were prodigious scholars whose ideas were deeply influential.  Socrates was a rebel who taught people to question authority and to act on their own principles even if it meant challenging the established way of doing things.  Socrates is given credit for the ideas that led to the formation of Democracy.  Unfortunately, Socrates became so unpopular with the people who were in power that he was executed mainly for teaching people to think for themselves.  No wonder we admire these people!

Before Democracy came along, the existing systems of government in the Greek city states included Monarchies, Tyrannies, and Dictators.  Athens itself used Oligarchy as their system of government.  Oligarchy means 'rule by the wealthy few'.  But the scholars of Athens could see the selfish decisions of wealthy were ruining the morale of the people and preventing progress.  The scholars spoke up and made persuasive arguments in favor of this new idea called Democracy.  First Aristotle wrote the Athenian Constitution.  Then Solon, the Father of Democracy, implemented the new system. 

Later it fell to a man named Cleisthenes to continue the development of Athenian Democracy.  Cleisthenes was the grandson and namesake of a foreign Greek tyrant, the ruler of Sicyon in the Peloponnese.  For a time he was also the brother-in-law of the Athenian tyrant, Peisistratus, who seized power three times before finally establishing a stable and apparently benevolent dictatorship. It was against the increasingly harsh rule of Peisistratus's eldest son that Cleisthenes championed a radical political reform movement which in 508 ushered in the Athenian democratic constitution.

It was under this political system that Athens successfully resisted the Persian onslaughts of 490 and 480, most conspicuously at the battles of Marathon and Salamis.  These victories in turn encouraged the poorest Athenians to demand a greater say in the running of their city.

So it was in the late 460s that Pericles presided over a radicalization of power that shifted the balance decisively to the poorest sections of society.  It was Pericles who made this new system of government truly work.  From 460 until 429 BCE when he died of sickness, Pericles controlled Athenian affairs. During Pericles rule, Athens reached it's greatest political, social, and economical power. He established a building project, which included the Parthenon, which today is still visible on top of the Acropolis. It was the democratic Athens of Pericles that won and lost an empire, that built the Parthenon, that gave a stage to Aeschylus, Plato, Sophocles, Euripides and Aristophanes, and laid the foundations of western rational and critical thought.

Despite these incredible contributions, unfortunately Greece later fell on difficult times.  For nearly two thousand years, Greece was subjected to constant oppression by outside empires.  After its heyday with Alexander the Great, Greece was conquered by the Romans who ruled Greece for over a thousand years.  Next came 400 years of oppression by the Ottoman Empire and Turkey.   It wasn't until 1829 that the Greek people successfully regained control of their own land.   The next hundred years weren't any easier.  Greece was constantly subjected to further meddling in its affairs by European Countries and endured more problems with its longtime enemy Turkey.  Greece again came under subjugation when the Nazis invaded during World War II  (who can forget the immortal film Guns of Navarone?)

However, after World War II, with the help of the Marshall Plan, Greece began a gradual return to strength and autonomy.  Now that Greece has had 50 years of peace and independence, this country has begun to flourish.  Today Greece enjoys one of the highest standards of living in the world thanks in large part to tourism.  People are drawn from all over the world to see the spectacular beauty of this rugged mountain country as well as the fascinating islands that dot the Aegean Sea. 

As our SSQQ community begins to gray a bit, many of us are developing a desire to see the world and understand history better.  I cannot tell you how many people say this trip is something they have wanted to do their entire life.  It is no surprise that we are drawn to Greece as well as to Italy, Crete, Sicily, and Turkey.  After all, this is where it all started. 

I spoke to an SSQQ student who recently had visited Greece.  I asked her to sum up the most interesting thing about her trip.  She replied, "That's easy - I enjoyed seeing the Ruins!   As I walked around the Temple of Artemis in Ephesus (Turkey), my tour guide taught me more ancient history in an afternoon than I ever absorbed in high school and college combined.  It was absolutely fascinating!"

However, you don't have to be retired or near retirement to develop a fascination for the Mediterranean.  One day my daughter Samantha asked me for money to buy some Christmas presents.  Sensing an opportunity, I ask Sam, a Junior at Duchesne Academy, to pretend she was a travel agent and identify some of the places she would like to see on our Greece-Italy-Turkey adventure.  Her eyes lit up - she had just finished studying Greece in her sophomore year.  Sam said she would be glad to help.  So she pulled out her notes from last year and started writing.

I was impressed with Sam's work.  I think we might just have a future Travel Writer in the family. 

WOULD THE WHIP BE USEFUL FOR ANOTHER DIRTY DANCING MOVIE?

-----Original Message-----
From:
Sent: Sunday, November 18, 2007 4:34 PM
To: dance@ssqq.com
Subject: Houston Whip

Dear Sir,

I read your great article as part of my research. I am a screenwriter in Hollywood.  I have been hired independently to write a treatment/concept revolving around Whip.

The contact has a friendly relationship with actor/dancer, Patrick Swayze, who will read the project and whose involvement could generate solid funding for the project.

Do you have any photos or songs or just advice I should include in the proposal? Swayze would probably do some sort of cameo where he is the older version of the lead character who's still winning contests at his age.

Is he a good enough dancer to master this dance? Maybe he already knows it. He's from Houston.


MY FIRST REPLY:

-----Original Message-----
From: Rick Archer
Sent: Monday, November 19, 2007 11:26 AM
To:
Subject: RE: Houston Whip

The Houston Whip is a dance very similar to the West Coast Swing used out in Los Angeles. I am more than certain that a dancer of Mr. Swayze's ability could learn it without a great deal of trouble.

I have never met Patrick Swayze, but I feel like I know him. By coincidence, I am a former acquaintance of Patsy Swayze, Patrick's mother.  This lovely lady owned a jazz/ballet studio here in Houston on Ella and 34th. I went to her studio as a student for several years during the mid-Seventies.

After seeing her dance company perform at a Houston festival, I was so inspired I went up and talked to her afterwards. I signed up for classes the following week.  I got to know Patsy well enough to have coffee with her on several occasions.

Because I was the same age as her son Patrick, Patsy liked to talk about him during our coffee breaks. Patsy would talk on and on about her son Patrick who was just beginning his career in "Grease" up in New York. She explained how Patrick was a star football player at Waltrip who had busted up a knee.  She wasn't as concerned about his ruined football career as she was about how it made dancing so much harder for him afterwards.

I lost touch with Patsy after Urban Cowboy. Patsy did the choreography for the Urban Cowboy movie filmed here in Houston in the late Seventies, then shortly thereafter moved to Los Angeles. Although I never met Patrick, I did meet his adopted sister Bambi as well as Buddy, his younger brother.

As far as the Whip is concerned, off the top of my head, I can think of five stories I have written that would serve as an excellent start for any script.

The best story is "201 Nights of Whip Dancing". This is the story of how I went out Whip Dancing every night of the week for nearly seven months as a way to deal with a very deep depression following the breakup of a marriage.  Whip Dancing served as a form of self-therapy. I not only managed to heal myself, I fell in love with Whip Dancing all at the same time.

In other words, this is a story of redemption that just happens to involve Whip dancing as the vehicle.

http://www.ssqq.com/stories/advent42.htm

Not only does the "201 Nights" story feature Whip Dancing as the salvation of my lost self-esteem, it starts with another interesting story as well.

http://www.ssqq.com/stories/reputation01.htm

These two stories give you the right to say "Based on a True Story" which always involves an audience more quickly than some imagination-based story.

Many dance stories revolve around dance competitions, but that theme has been used so many times (e.g. "Dance w Me", "Take the Lead", "Shall We Dance?") that it might be time to try a different angle. For example, one of the greatest dance movies of all time, "Dirty Dancing", didn't have anything to do with a dance contest. Dance Teaching can be an interesting subject in itself - some of the best scenes from "Saturday Night Fever" and "Dirty Dancing" involved the teaching aspects of dance.

On the other hand, a movie about dance teaching is not sure box office, now is it? "Shall We Dance?" w J Lo and Richard Gere should have been as a great as the original Japanese version, but the American remake somehow missed the magic of the original. Too bad because the Japanese original had me smiling from head to toe.

As a writer, you know yourself the best place to start is a story that normal people can relate to. "Dirty Dancing", for example, worked as a story because it involved a decent kid who overcame social prejudice and tough luck to succeed. "Saturday Night Fever" was easy to relate to because a working class kid used dance as a ticket out of the slums. In both movies, the dancing just happened to make good stories even better.
.................

I am not sure which stories of mine you have read, but my best story about the Houston Whip is the "Sleazy Bar Party".

http://www.ssqq.com/stories/advent47.htm

 The Houston Whip as you probably can gather is Houston's version of "Dirty Dancing". With a story this rich as a background, you shouldn't have any trouble coming up with an original script.

Here is another story - "Save the Whip"

http://www.ssqq.com/information/savewhip01.htm

Just to be sure, I have one more story about the Houston Whip titled "The History of Whip".

http://www.ssqq.com/stories/whiphist.htm

One more aspect to consider is the music. The Whip started as a dance that worked well to the Texas Blues. ZZ Top and Stevie Ray Vaughan are some modern day examples of the Texas Blues sound. You could have quite a soundtrack for a movie with the Whip in it. I put on the Blues during dance classes and people go crazy. You can't miss with a movie that has a good Blues soundtrack.

Let me know what you think.

MY SECOND REPLY:

 -----Original Message-----
From: Rick Archer
Sent: Monday, November 19, 2007 12:08 PM
To:
Subject: RE: Houston Whip

Two minutes after I sent you my first email, I had another thought.   "Dirty Dancing" never had a true sequel. Yes, "Havana Nights" was considered a sequel of sorts, but it missed the point - We liked Johnny in the original and wanted to know more about Johnny's life afterwards, not a couple kids in Cuba.

Why not connect Dirty Dancing I and Dirty Dancing II with a third movie using the Johnny character? In fact, it is such an obvious plot line that I am fairly certain the same idea has already occurred to Patrick Swayze. I would not be at all surprised if your project is probably shooting at this angle already.

Believe me, if the movie was well done, it would be a wonderful treat. There are boomers everywhere who would flock to see a Johnny-based Dirty Dancing sequel with Patrick Swayze in it.

Speaking from personal experience, when Patrick Swayze appeared in his cameo role in Dirty Dancing 2, I loved seeing him in action so much that I wanted to see him even more. It was a golden moment for all people like me who loved his role in the first DD movie.

I couldn't help but think at the time how much fun it would be to see a sequel movie that connected DD 1 and DD 2 to answer this question: "What happened to Johnny after summer camp in the Catskills"" We already know from Dirty Dancing 2 that Johnny became a dance instructor. Why not connect the two movies with Johnny as a Houston based dance instructor?

The Whip literally hit its stride here in Houston during the Sixties. Often called the "Dirty Whip", one of the reasons the original "Dirty Dancing" was so popular here in Houston was because DD 1 reminded people of the Whip.

By coincidence, Swayze's original "Dirty Dance" movie also took place in the Sixties.

How difficult would it be to come up with a story that has the Swayze character in Dirty Dancing 1 somehow finding his way to Houston, Texas, and running into the Whip, another form of Dirty Dancing? Of course he is immediately drawn to it and eventually becomes a dance instructor.

You could have some eye-catching Whip dance scenes reminiscent of DD 1 that would bring smiles to any audience. I have plenty of video for any choreographer to use for ideas. Plus there are enough old-time Whippers around Houston who would be more than happy to share stories of the Dirty Whip back in the Sixties.

Furthermore "Havana Nights" featured Johnny as a Salsa instructor. One of the best movies of all time was "Dance w Me", a story involving a Houston-based dance instructor dancing the Salsa. The Mambo - the dance featured in Dirty Dancing 1 - was the big dance hit of DD 1. The Mambo just happens to be the Sixties version of Salsa dancing. It wouldn't be too much of a stretch of imagination to get a steamy Latin Dance scene in the Dirty Dancing 3 sequel.

This new movie would be a completely believable transition, one that all fans of "Dirty Dancing" would immediately be drawn to.

I have one favor to ask. Make sure Patrick Swayze reads my two emails. I promise him this new movie would be a success. It is a great story which would be a crowning moment in his acting career.

 -----Original Message-----
From:
Sent: Monday, November 19, 2007 5:14 PM
To: Rick Archer
Subject: Re: Houston Whip

Dear Sir, Rick Archer:

Thank you ever so much for your entertaining, impressive, crucial, helpful, hooked-in, and enlightening reply.

More to come. Your input has helped fuel the essence of this project.

 -----Original Message-----
From: Rick Archer
Sent: Tuesday, November 20, 2007 11:26 AM
To:
Subject: RE: Houston Whip

Thank you for the kind words. After I sent you my first two emails, my wife and I talked about another "Dirty Dancing" movie.

She and I agreed the public has tired a bit of fantasy movies and computer-generated special effects. It is about time we had a movie with a story behind it.

Dirty Dancing I remains a hit movie without a TRUE sequel. But it won't be easy. They dropped the ball with the Saturday Night Fever remake ("Staying Alive") because the sequel was so unrealistic. The "Shall We Dance?" remake was tepid despite the fire power of Gere, Lopez, and Sarandon. The failure of this movie to capture anyone's imagination is still a mystery to me, but the warmth of the original failed to cross over to the American version.

Nor was "Havana Nights" much of a hit. No one even remembers who was in it other than Patrick Swayze. (By the way, did anyone ever point out that the overthrow of Batista occurred BEFORE Dirty Dancing I was supposed to have taken place, but that Swayze was thirty years older? Or was Swayze supposed to be just some anonymous teacher, not really Johnny? I suppose most people's grasp of history is so weak that no one cares.)

Dirty Dancing II was so lame that it is only redeeming quality was that it opened the door for a true sequel. From my point of view, Swayze's cameo in Havana Nights was the only highlight of the movie. My wife was begging for more dancing scenes w Patrick Swayze. I felt the same way. That's when I knew a true sequel was called for. Based on her reaction and that of the entire audience, I know the energy is there to revisit one of the greatest dance movies of all time.

You have a potential hit on your hands. Good luck in pursuing this project.

(Rick Archer's Note: This is a fun article for all you ladies out there.)

Too many mind games these days

Ana Veciana-Suarez
Miami Herald
Wednesday, October 3, 2007


It's no longer good enough to drag myself from bed every morning to work out in the gym. Now, I'm told, I have to exercises my mind too.

Brain calisthenics - imagine cranial jumping jacks and neural toe-touches - are the rage for baby boomers these days. Magazines are full of brain teasers, world tricks, memory games and articles on brain healthy food. Sudoku, that addictive numbers puzzles, has become the mind's version of green tea.

Yes, the generation that wouldn't trust anybody over 30, that refused to grow up, that continues to work in retirement - my peers - has found a new obsession and turned it into a growing business: cardio for the mind.

There are brain gyms and brain workshops and companies that lure clients with their anti-aging exercises. The AARP offers tips on brain health, and the Alzheimer's' Association conducts Maintain Your Brain workshops for large corporations, Some heath insurers even offer brain-fitness camps and sell books encouraging brain-healthy living. It's not just the body that needs to be strengthened and sculpted anymore.

But frankly, these programs haven't impressed me much. Fads come and go, and science has yet to offer irrefutable proof that such exercising keeps forgetfulness at bay. In fact, doing crosswords may be the mental equivalent of slathering night cream on wrinkles.

Then I read that Nintendo has introduced a video game intended for baby boomers and their older parents, and I realized that mental workouts were more than my generation's refusal to go quietly into the night. Brain exercises are the latest search for the mythical fountain of youth.

Nintendo's Brain Age features 14 basic activities and several additional side games, including word-memory activities, simple math problems, syllable counting and read-aloud poetry. It promises to give "your prefrontal cortex a workout", according to the manual.

Oooh!

I'm not sure what the prefrontal cortex does, but I like to think of it as the brainiac version of abs.

I have not rushed out to buy Brain Age and have tried Sudoku only once, thought I do want to ward off midlife brain decay. But my problem is not so much one of recall and rapid response. I suffer, instead, from something no game or medication will change: selective memory, an ailment common among women my age. Or so my husband says.

I, for instance, forget dinner on the stove but remember - in astonishing detail - every single darn time he's messed up. And that's quite a long list, too, particular when catalogued without the aid of notes.

Really, who needs Nintendo and ginkgo biloba when you have a spouse?


(Rick Archer's Note: I was especially amused by this story because it is true.  Back in the Eighties I had a girlfriend named Judy Price who could remember everything I ever said in astonishing detail whenever it came time to win an argument.  She caught me in one contradiction after another, but she couldn't remember where she put her keys to save her soul.)

Rick Archer's Note: In order to appreciate this amazing story, you first need to go watch this bird in action.
First click the link: Snowball the Dancing Cockatoo  The video is only a minute long and I promise you will smile.  Then come back and read the story.

SNOWBALL

On Saturday, October 13, my friend Gary Richardson sent me a link to the video of a dancing bird.  As I viewed the bird in action, I was amused and impressed.  In fact, I was so impressed by the quality of the bird's dancing that I actually became SUSPICIOUS.

So I wrote Gary back and asked if he thought the video was legitimate.

-----Original Message-----
From: Rick Archer
Sent: Saturday, October 13, 2007 10:16 AM
To: TFW Computers
Subject: RE: A cockatoo that can do West Coast Swing?

Gary, Do you think there is a chance that video is a fake? I noticed the video hesitated several times.

Otherwise that was very impressive. The bird had great rhythm. Some of the movements resembled actual dance steps.

-----Original Message-----
From: TFW Computers
Sent: Saturday, October 13, 2007 2:56 PM
To: Rick Archer
Subject: Re: A cockatoo that can do West Coast Swing?

I thought it was real, myself.
 

-----Original Message-----
From: Rick Archer
Sent: Saturday, October 13, 2007 3:08 PM
To: TFW Computers
Subject: RE: A cockatoo that can do West Coast Swing?

Do me a favor and look at it again. It's only a minute long.

I am very suspicious that any bird has moves that would be the envy of a human. Perfect rhythm, head bobbing to the music, dance steps that almost seem choreographed. Too good!

I mean, think about that video you sent me where a fake music machine plays music based on animated balls hitting the exact notes. How much harder would be to create a one-minute fake video of a dancing bird? First you film a bird who bounces around and pick out a few moves. If you pay attention, the bird only has about four moves that are repeated over and over again. He lifts his left leg over and over again. Think about how you can do a simple computer dance animation a dancer with maybe two frames alternating over and over again.

I think it is that one move where the bird starts to syncopate his footwork that really raised my eyebrow.
 

-----Original Message-----
From: Gary Richardson
Sent: Saturday, October 13, 2007 6:12 PM
To: Rick Archer
Subject: Re: A cockatoo that can do West Coast Swing?

I still think the video is legit. My assistant Tim thinks it is real too.  Watch the other bird in the background to the left. He is doing something different and not repeating...same video.    Now what do you think?

The more I watched the video, the more incredulous I became.  Finally I decided to email the website and ask some questions.

 -----Original Message-----
From: Rick Archer
Sent: Saturday, October 13, 2007 3:24 PM
To: birdloversonly@sbcglobal.net
Subject: dance video of cockatoo

I am writing to ask about the one minute video of a parrot on your web site that dances better than most humans could ever hope.

I am a professional dance instructor. I am very suspicious that any bird has dance moves that would be the envy of a human. Perfect rhythm, head bobbing to the music, dance steps that almost seem choreographed. Too good!

My biggest red flag is this question: Why would a bird necessarily dance with the same moves and dance steps that a human would use?
How hard would it be to create a one-minute fake video of a dancing bird? This bird is so good it seems like a Disney animation.

Would you mind terribly letting me know what the truth is? I am dying of curiosity!

-----Original Message-----
From: Birdlovers Only [mailto:birdloversonly@sbcglobal.net]
Sent: Saturday, October 13, 2007 7:02 PM
To: Rick Archer
Subject: Re: dance video of cockatoo

You can see Snowball and myself on national TV on Monday. We will be on the Morning Show on FOX. I wish I could say the video was doctored because he puts us all to shame over here. As a matter of fact, I was dancing in front of him in the video and I was getting off beat... a couple of times he stopped because I think I was messing him up!!!

Hate to tell you this...Snowball's dancing is real.


-----Original Message-----
From: Rick Archer [mailto:dance@ssqq.com]
Sent: Monday, October 15, 2007 10:46 AM
To: Birdlovers Only
Subject: RE: dance video of cockatoo

I believe you, but I have to admit I am astonished. My email was not an idle one. Since I own the largest dance studio in the country, I have been watching humans dance for thirty years. And because I teach that kind of dancing for a living, I am actually in position to judge the quality of the dancing and assess your pet's ability vis a vis human beings. Based on what I saw, your bird out-dances 99.8% of the human race.

Snowball does footwork syncopations that would make any dancer proud and has a sense of rhythm all dancers would be envious of. In addition I recognized dance moves that humans use and thought that was suspicious. Why would a bird have the same moves as a human?

So I concluded it was more likely to be a fraud than the real thing. So all credit goes to your talented friend and thank you for sharing her prowess.

I will write a story about Snowball for my next newsletter. Any information you wish to include would be more than appreciated. I will send you a copy of the story.

After FOX, surely David Letterman is next. Have fun on your carpet ride to fame. And thanks for satisfying my curiosity! I appreciate your help.


-----Original Message-----
From: Birdlovers Only [mailto:birdloversonly@sbcglobal.net]
Sent: Saturday, October 13, 2007 7:02 PM
To: Rick Archer
Subject: Re: dance video of cockatoo

Hi Rick,

I loved your email! It gave me a chuckle because I just finished answering an email from a scientist. Rather than go into the long drawn out explanation, I will paste it here for you to read. The top portion is my reply to his email.

Aniruddh Patel wrote:

Dear Bird Lovers Only Rescue,

I study music and the brain at The Neurosciences Institute (in San Diego) and am interested in how humans move to the beat of music. It has been claimed that humans are the only species that move in sync to the beat of rhythmic music, but the Sept video "May I have this dance" posted on your website (Snowball dancing) makes me wonder if parrots also have this ability.

May I ask a few questions about the video?

Do you have any info on Snowball's background? Was anyone dancing off camera when the video was made (could Snowball
be imitating?). Can he adjust his tempo to move in sync with music that has a faster or slower beat?

And finally, would you be willing to share the original video with me for scientific analysis of the timing of Snowball's movements in relation to the rhythm of the music?

FYI, I'm attaching an article I wrote in 2006 where I lay out some of the reason I (and others in my field) are interested in whether or not nonhuman animals can move to the beat of music.

Regards,
Ani Patel

Aniruddh D. Patel, Ph.D.
Esther J. Burnham Fellow
The Neurosciences Institute
10640 John Jay Hopkins Drive
San Diego, CA 92121

858-626-2085 tel
858-626-2099 fax
apatel@nsi.edu
http://www.nsi.edu/users/patel

Dear Dr. Patel,

Before I became founder and president of this rescue I used to work as a molecular biologist at the University of Chicago and also Rush Medical Center prior to that. So from one scientist to another, I admire your zest for learning more about Snowball.

When Snowball was relinquished to us, the previous owner brought a CD of the Back Street Boys. He told us that he would dance to other songs on the CD, but that this particular one he LOVED! He told us to put the CD in the player and watch Snowball dance. Snowball was on my arm at the time and he danced in wonderful rhythm to the music. We have seen many birds come through our rescue dance to music but none like Snowball. I almost fainted from the sight of this bird dancing better than I could ever hope to! In the video I was dancing in front of him, but there were times that he stopped dancing because I was throwing him off rhythm because I was dancing so badly! He'd pick the beat back up after ignoring me and get back into it again....until the next time that I'd throw him off. No one taught Snowball to dance. He did this all himself.

I had traveled to New York with Snowball so he could appear on national TV in front of a live audience this morning on the FOX Morning Show starring Mike and Juliet. Snowball tried to dance how he wanted to, but the camera man kept running up to him too quickly and closely and scared Snowball so he kept stopping.

As to whether he adjusts his dancing to the speed of the rhythm....YES. When a Santana song came on the radio, he had a slower dance step because the song had a slower beat than the Back Street Boys song.

I can help shorten your search for the answer as to whether an animal can move to the rhythm of the music...the answer is emphatically YES. (At least birds can...I cannot speak for other species)

I will have our computer expert send you instructions on you may download this video from a web site somewhere since I'm not sure myself how that can be done.

If you are ever interested in donating to our rescue, you may do so on our main web site www.birdloversonly.org or by going to our blog.

I hope I have been of help in your search for answers to your questions!

Irena

Rick Archer's Note:  Well, there you have it.  I started out as a skeptic and now I am a firm believer.  That bird can dance!

Pretty amazing story. Please do not be surprised if some of your future dance classes are taught by Snowball. I am considering hiring him for our Freestyle Class.  SSQQ may indeed be going to the birds.  Besides, maybe they are cheep cheep cheaper to pay.

Jamie Mabry is one of my favorite people at the studio.  Even though I don't know her very well personally, just seeing her always makes me happy. Jamie appears at the studio regularly three nights a week.  On Sundays she helps her good friend Linda Cook teach a Western class.  On Wednesdays Jamie is currently taking a Ghost Town along with Linda Cook.  More about that in a moment.  On Fridays Jamie helps her friend Steve Casko with his Western class while her friend Laura Graber helps Linda in another room. The Three Musketeers - Jamie, Steve, and Laura - are a big part of Wednesday and Friday Practice Night.  You will see them over in the corner near the DJ booth chatting the night away.  They like each other so much that many times after Practice is over, the three of them will go talk in the Parking Lot as well.  The Three Musketeers don't know this, but I know what time it is whenever they walk in the studio.   If I see them and it is Sunday, then it's 4:30 pm.  If I see them and its Wednesday/Friday, then it must be 7 pm.  They never arrive at the studio one minute early.  I think they sit and wait outside the studio so they can time their entrance perfectly. One of the reason I like Jamie so much is that she keeps Steve Casko in line.  Steve teases me constantly.  Steve seems to have a complete dossier of stupid things I have said and done that he can refer to at a moment's notice.  But since Steve is so careful about what he says around me, I have never been able to get any good stories on him to use for counterattack.  On the other hand, Jamie orders Steve around in dance class all the time.  I get such a kick out of seeing her give Steve a hard time.  Sometimes when I hear Jamie speaking in another room, I will secretly put my ear to the wall and listen just in case Jamie is busy explaining to the class why the patterns Steve just taught them was all wrong.

Jamie Mabry, Steve Casko, Laura Graber

Another thing that is fun to do is watch the Three Musketeers dance together.  At any given moment, you will see Steve dancing backwards with Jamie leading him.   Jamie leads Western Swing better than any other woman except for Linda Cook.   She actually moves Steve around pretty well.  Other times Jamie will dance with Laura.  Sometimes I can't tell which one of them is the boy and which one is the girl.  In fact I think they go back and forth during each song.  What I don't know is whether it is deliberate or not.  I secretly think they accidentally flip back and forth between lead/follow without a second thought.

Jamie is an amazing Rhythm machine.  I have never danced with a woman who had a stronger sense of rhythm than Jamie does.  Furthermore she is almost impossible to knock off balance.  Jamie somehow overcomes practically any mistake I make without anyone even noticing that I screwed up.  And Jamie follows anything I throw at her without difficulty.  No wonder I like to dance with her so much!

Jamie has been helping to teach Western dancing here at SSQQ for many years now.  We are fortunate to have her help.  She started here as a kid and now she has become a lovely young lady.  I suppose I got the upper hand on her back when she was still a polite teenager.  That's when I started teasing her because she was so shy and easy-going.  Over the years I have asked Jamie to become a lead teacher on several occasions, but she has always said she prefers helping Linda and Steve.   However whenever we need an emergency dance teacher, Jamie has been kind enough to step in and do a great job.  Because Jamie studies the lead so carefully, she is a better Lead dancer than most of the men at the studio.   Because of her thorough knowledge of the man's part as well as the woman's, Jamie has the distinction of being the best Western teacher at the studio who doesn't teach.  Now that's an odd title.

Jamie did not teach on Wednesdays in November or December.  That's my fault and I feel guilty about it.  Here's the story.

As I get a bit older, there are times when I feel pretty worn out.   Whenever I taught a crash course on Saturdays, it meant that I would work six nights in a row.  That stretch of six days was tough.  So about six months ago I relinquished my teaching spot on Wednesdays to create a teaching position for our gifted Western teacher Scott Ladell.  Not only did I get Scott a permanent spot on our most important Western night, I enjoyed my extra night off thoroughly.  

However to my surprise Salsa grew so big on Thursday in September, I was forced to cancel our Ballroom Program on Thursday to create more space for Salsa classes.   With the loss of both Thursday and Wednesday, this meant I was only working three nights a week - Sunday, Monday, Friday.   I didn't mind a little extra time off, but only working three nights was ridiculous.  So in November I asked Linda Cook if she would kindly give her teaching spot on Wednesdays and move to Thursday so she could teach an additional Salsa class.  Linda loves Salsa, but she really did not want to leave Wednesday at all.  It turned out that she has made so many friendships over the years that Wednesdays at the studio is important to Linda.  So Linda and Jamie decided to take Scott's Ghost Town class on Wednesdays in November.  Mind you, these two women definitely do not need any more Western dance lessons.   They simply wanted to be at the studio so much on Wednesday that they would take a class if they couldn't teach!  As if I didn't feel guilty enough already about pushing Linda to Thursdays...

Jamie really enjoys our SSQQ Halloween Pages.  However Jamie prefers homemade costumes over store rentals or purchases.  Jamie made our Best Costume page a couple years ago in 2005.  She and her friend Lani Hutto (who is soon to return to Houston from her stint in the Army) to make the Best Costume page with her Green Eggs and Ham outfit.

For the 2007 Halloween Party, Jamie came as a "Bad Girl", Laura came as a "Good Girl", and Steve came as a person who couldn't decide which type of woman he preferred.  It was a clever idea, but the lack of supporting accessories for their costumes hurt their chances of making the Best Costume Page.  Still, I was impressed with their concept and spent much of the party mulling over Steve's dilemma.

Jamie's latest project has been to help Steve become a better Whip dancer.   Jamie accompanied Steve to four months of Whip classes recently.  Steve's Whip dancing improved considerably in the process.

For some reason, a couple years ago I started misspelling Jamie's name.  I spell her name "Jaime."  It wasn't till last Friday, November 23, that I discovered I have been misspelling her name for several years now.  What I can't figure out is why she never corrected me!   Jamie was nice enough to email me to correct the name of a friend that I had botched in the newsletter, so why didn't she straighten me out on her own name?  I remain baffled.  I think deep down she just feels sorry for me.  I don't know how the subject came up last Friday, but soon I will begin spelling her name correctly.  However if you want to see her name misspelled one last time or two, click on the December or January schedule and look for Friday. 

Oddly enough, I haven't always misspelled her name.  I started out spelling it correctly when I wrote a story about her eight years ago.  When I first published this story, Jamie was very embarrassed.  Hopefully reprinting it will bring her another round of teasing as well.  It's kind of paper scissors rock thing - I tease Jamie, Jamie pushes Steve around, Steve always teases me. 

I hope you will do me a favor and give Jamie a hard time about this story.  She deserves all the teasing you can give her!

From the December 1999 SSQQ Newsletter
Posted 12-20-99

Jamie gets an "A" in Country-Western Dancing!!

Jamie Mabry is a darling young lady who has been taking Western classes at SSQQ for over a year. She is so good at Western Swing that she joined the legendary Death Valley class and did very well. This summer she saddened us with the announcement that she would be leaving in September to resume classes up at Texas A&M.

However I have been secretly delighted to see her return practically every weekend to join us for Friday night Western dancing throughout the fall. My guess is Jamie hasn't completely adapted to life at A&M other than putting in the time necessary to complete her education. Since she is a senior, I suppose she might be reluctant to get too involved with student activities since she only has a limited amount of time left till she graduates.

One day in October Jamie let it slip that she was taking a C&W Dance class up at A&M for credit (unbelievable). I was immediately curious. I peppered the poor young lady with questions about the class. For one thing, Jamie suspected she knew more about Western dancing than her teacher did. The teacher was apparently a jazz teacher who had been roped into doing this against her will and better judgment. Jamie speculated openly about the chance her teacher had never been Western dancing in her life. The course consisted mostly of line dances, some of which were pretty corny. Furthermore the boys had no sense of rhythm at all. And they hated to be corrected. Jamie was astonished at how bad the dancing was.

When December rolled around I was very pleased to discover that Jamie did indeed receive an "A" in her dance class. I was curious about what the Finals consisted of, but I think Jamie became suspicious about my interest and started to be a little more reluctant to disclose any more damaging information.

I asked if the teacher ever noticed how good Jamie was and Jamie's reply was something to the effect that she wasn't sure if her teacher ever noticed anything. Well, whatever, SSQQ is very pleased to have contributed to Jamie's GPA and if she ever applies at SSQQ for a job, she should definitely plan on bringing her transcript with her.

Rick Archer's Note: This letter was originally sent to me in an email back in December 2001.  I like this story so much I usually add it to each December Newsletter so our new students can read it too.

A CHRISTMAS DANCE STORY
Written by Frank Jefferson

Mon 12/17/2001 2:41 PM

Hi Rick,

My name is Frank Jefferson. I doubt you will remember me and my wife Jackie, but we remember your studio very well. We took lessons at SSQQ back in 1991 for about five months until my company transferred me to Denver that summer.

The reason I am writing is to tell you how your studio and dancing changed my life and my marriage eleven years ago. I ran across your web site the other day while I was visiting my oldest son here in Houston. He mentioned an interest in taking dance classes so I looked you up on the Internet. As I read some of your anecdotes, I started to reminisce about learning to dance Western at SSQQ. Then it occurred to me my Christmas story might be interesting to some of the people who visit your studio.

As 1990 neared its conclusion, things were going pretty well for me. My career as an accountant was going well, one boy was finishing his doctorate work at UT, my other son was in college and my daughter was a senior in high school.  I thought my marriage was doing pretty well, but as I look back I realize increasingly my wife and I were spending less and less time together. Part of the problem was I had become a golf addict.

Back then I played golf Friday, Saturday, and Sunday without question and usually managed to play a round during the week plus at least go practice my driving or my putting after work one or two other days. It was an obsession with me. I love the game with a passion (still do for that matter!). What other sport allows you to visit with friends, take a leisurely stroll through the woods and beautiful scenery, gives you some good exercise, and challenges you mentally as well as physically?

Even when I wasn't playing, I was reading golf magazines or watching a golf tournament on TV or on videotape. I may have physically been in the house, but mentally I was usually on the golf course. As I said, I was a golf addict.

Then came Christmas 1990. Christmas was always an agony for me since as usual I had no clue what to buy my wife for a present. What do you give the woman who has every possession she would ever need? I wracked my brains for what to get her. Finally in desperation I gave up and simply asked, "Jackie, what do you want for Christmas this year?"

It was almost like she had been waiting for this moment! Without hesitation her reply was to grab her purse and pull out a schedule listing your studio's dance classes. I think a girl friend had given it to her. She laid it out on the table, pointed to it, and simply said, "Frank, I want you to take a dance class with me in January." No anger. No pleading. No guilt trip or anything like that. This was just like my Jackie. I asked her a question and she answered me matter-of-fact. She wanted me to take a dance class with her.

For some reason, I was stunned. I had not expected this. Money I had to give. Going out and buying something was no big deal. Even building something like a porch would have been no problem. But committing some valuable free time to do something stupid like take dance lessons? You gotta be kidding!

But Jackie knew me too well. Deep down she knew I enjoy pleasing her. She held eye contact and said nothing. In fact she smiled the whole time. I think she knew exactly what was going through my mind. For a while I sort of felt set up, but eventually I realized it wasn't the worst thing in the world that she had asked me to do. I can still remember while she just sat there at the kitchen table watching me make up my mind! I think she enjoyed watching me squirm, something she has never denied for a moment.

It took me a long time to answer. Finally I realized I wasn't going to figure a way out of this. Despite my best efforts I could not come up with one good excuse so I gave up and said, "Okay. If that's what you want, you got it!" I wrapped up a letter and put it in a box. When she opened it Christmas Day, it said, "I promise to take a dance class with you in January!  Love, Frank"

Jackie gave me a big hug and grinned as my kids teased me unmercifully. What had I gotten myself into?

Two weeks later we started taking a Twostep class at your studio. I think the teacher was a lady named Sharon. Fortunately the class was on a Wednesday which was practically the only day I didn't play golf.

I was so nervous the first night. I did not know what to expect. At first I didn't even know if your studio really existed. We couldn't see anything from the street that looked like a dance studio. We had to walk down this long hallway till we found the place to register. Then we sat on some chairs in a big room with about 60 other people with a bunch of guys who looked just as worried as I was.

Once we got going, to my surprise the moves weren't very difficult. Within fifteen minutes Jackie and I were already dancing to music. Then came a shock. Sharon asked us to switch partners. Jackie hadn't told me about this! She grinned at me as suddenly I was expected to move to dance with a woman I had never seen before in my life. What had I gotten myself into? My heart sank with worry. Fortunately I soon discovered the moves worked with the other women in the class too. This was good!

In fact I began to enjoy dancing with everyone in class. Everyone was so nice!  Once I got on the wrong foot and accidentally stepped on a lady's foot. I didn't put all my weight on her foot, thank goodness, but it still had to hurt. Her name was Carol. She laughed and said don't worry about it. I just melted with gratitude at her forgiveness. From then on Carol and I became good friends.  At each class she would point at her foot and say it had almost healed, but could I aim at the other one instead just in case?  By an odd coincidence another time I ran Carol into the pole in the middle of the room.  This time as I stared in shock at my stupidity, Carol almost died laughing. "What are you trying to do, Frank, kill me?  Did someone pay you to do this?"

At the end of the evening, Sharon told us about Practice Night. Jackie asked if I would mind staying.  I looked at my watch and thought about work the next day. I was tired and ready to go, but then I saw that look on her face. Sure, why not? I said we could stay for a little while and see what it was like.

It turned out to be more of a challenge than I had expected. Without the teacher calling out the timing, I had a hard time figuring out how the steps fit the beat. And I couldn't tell a Polka from a Waltz from a Twostep to save my life if I had to. However Jackie came through like a charm. She told me to just dance and she would try to follow. Although I doubt I was anywhere near the beat, once this pressure was off, I started to enjoy plowing around the floor. I had an absolute ball! This was better than dodge 'em cars! The highlight of the night came towards the end. I had been so absorbed in counting "slow slow quick quick" to myself I was oblivious to everything around me. But after a particularly good run around the floor, I realized I had danced an entire song without making a mistake. I looked at Jackie and saw her beaming with pride and happiness. She was so grateful to be here with me that her smile brought actual tears to my eyes. I had not seen her smile at me in this way in a long, long time. I will never forget that moment.

To make a long story short, dancing became a hobby I looked forward to just like I did with golf. On days I knew I was going to dance class, I would hitch a ride to work. Then later Jackie would pick me up at work and we would go somewhere for dinner before class. We began to chat again just like we did earlier in our marriage. Then we would go to class and have fun learning the Western Swing. We would visit with some of the people we had grown to like before class and during breaks. Practice Night became pretty much a ritual with us as well.

Then in March 1991 I got the news - my company wanted me to transfer to Denver. God, how I hated agreeing to do it!  As I talked the move over with Jackie, I was surprised that golf never really entered my mind.  However one thing that kept going through my mind was where was I going to dance in Denver? But the money was too good to resist plus with my daughter leaving soon for college, it was less of a problem for the two of us to relocate than the other families in the firm.

Up in Denver we found no studio like yours was in existence. And Western dancing like you have in Houston was practically non-existent. But dancing was in my system now, so we decided to try Ballroom Dancing. To my surprise, I liked it just as much as Western. I even discovered I was able to tell a Waltz from a Tango and be able to keep the beat as well!

We discovered a 'dance underground' in Denver. Practically every night of the week a different studio would offer social Ballroom dancing, and on the weekends there were special events sponsored through a dance organization I am sure you have heard of called USABDA. The big moment for me was when I realized I was looking forward to a Saturday evening dance with my lovely wife just as much as I was looking forward to playing golf that afternoon!

I still play a lot of golf, but have cut back a little to make more time for my dancing as well. Recently I even let myself get talked into dance competitions. Can you believe that? We haven't won anything yet, but the point is I enjoy improving at dance just like I once obsessed over my putting. I realize my story borders on being sappy, but the truth is that dance has become the favorite activity for my wife and I to share.

Thanks again for helping us get started!

Regards, Frank Jefferson


(Rick Archer's Note: I would imagine stories like this one are more common than we might realize, but very few people take the time to write them down and send them to me. I am particularly grateful to Mr. Jefferson, whom I did indeed do not know, for sending me this poignant letter.)
 

Back in August 2007, I wrote a series of articles about PROTECTING YOUR REPUTATION.  Although I did not get much feedback on the ten articles I wrote, I still consider it some of the best writing I have ever done. 

One of my ten Reputation articles dealt with Google and its power to embellish or destroy reputations. 

I happen to have some first-hand experience with the Power of Google.  During 2007 I received seven different inquiries from former students and instructors hoping to improve their Internet Reputation by getting me to remove their name from an article I wrote about them. 

One issue involved a woman who had recently become a Christian.  She felt that the combination of listing her name beside pictures of her in a bikini on one of my Cruise Travel Stories was inappropriate.  What would her new boyfriend think of her?

Another issue dealt with a former instructor who was upset that my story had cost her a job.

A third story involved a man who had divorced the wife he met here at the studio and didn't want it known.

A fourth story involved a belly dance costume picture of a woman who preferred her name not be attached although she didn't mind the picture at all.

A fifth story involved a very nasty woman who behaved badly eight years ago and now didn't want the world to see her name attached to the story.

The sixth incident involved a divorce and a request not to have their names on the Internet any longer.

The seventh incident involved a broken engagement.  Again they didn't want their names appearing on the Internet.

As you can gather, my Google Article was an interesting story to write.  After I got through writing the story, for the fun of it I decided to Google my own name as well.  Lo and behold, guess what I discovered!

RICHARD ARCHER ROMANTICALLY INVOLVED WITH SCARLETT JOHANSSON!!
	'Holy Smokes!' I thought to myself.  'My brain must be an open book!' Sure I had a big crush on Scarlett Johansson, but I never realized that Google could read my mind!   Google really is amazing!   But what would my wife Marla think? Then I remembered the big crush Marla had on a TV Weatherman.  She's in no position to chew me out! I am guilt free on this Scarlett stuff.

Back when I first noticed my new notoriety, I was very flattered that such a beautiful young lady would be interested in me.  It took me a while to come to grips with this fantasy come true.  I have to tell you - it went to my head.  I realized that I wanted the whole world to know about the relationship!  However, right before I decided to finally go public with news of the affair, I decided to check out the story one more time.  Imagine my chagrin when suddenly I got the news that my affair with Scarlett was over.  How depressing!  Here today, gone tomorrow.  Oh well, I probably couldn't have afforded her.
Crushed and more than slightly disappointed, I decided to delve into the gory details.  This is what I discovered -
In 2006 there was a story generated by the media that Richard Archer was having a relationship with Scarlett Johansson while she was filming Woody Allen movie Scoop in London.  Archer later claimed he had never said anything of the sort. It did in fact turn out to be a false rumor, which was confirmed when Johansson declared "I've never met him, and until all this started, I'd never even heard of him." The media turned on Archer.  One newspaper publicly accused Archer of creating the rumors himself. Archer responded, "A paper phoned our manager and said: 'We know he’s dating Scarlett Johansson, her people have told us.'   We told them it wasn’t true and that I’d never even met her. They ran the story anyway, saying I was secretly dating Scarlett Johansson. A week later they ran another story saying her people were denying it and that: 'Richard Archer is a fantasist.' and that I'd made the whole thing up for publicity.  The wankers.  It was quite funny until I ended up looking like a prick." Oh well, I guess that means it's over between Scarlett and me.  Google did leave me with one consolation prize however: In 2007, Richard Archer was nominated for "Sexiest Male"... Well, it's about time!  By the way, there is no truth to the rumor that I started the rumor.  Well, maybe there's some truth to it....  ;-)

Reprinted from the Houston Chronicle

Oct. 9, 2007, 5:44PM
DEAR ABBY : Yes, Bra is evidence, but not of crime

By ABBY
Universal Press Syndicate

Dear Abby:

After an unhappy 12-year marriage, I divorced my husband. Six months later I met a divorced dermatologist online. We were immediately attracted to each other and, six weeks later, he invited me to move in with him, which I did.

Last week when I picked up our clothes at the dry cleaner and checked them as I put them into the car, I came across an expensive black lace bra, size 36DD. (I am a small B.) I was very upset and threw it onto the freeway on my way home.

When my boyfriend got home that night, I confronted him. He told me it had to have been mistakenly added to our order and asked me what I had done with it. When I said I had thrown it out, he became irate and ordered me to look for it.

The next day, his lawyer friend told me the bra was evidence in a sexual-assault case. He said it had DNA on it and he needed it for court. He said I should go back to the freeway and look for it. I did but could not locate it.

I feel guilty for losing my temper and for possibly causing the lawyer to lose this case. My boyfriend is still mad at me. How can I make this right?

TRUSTING in L.A.


Dear Trusting:

You need to develop a strong sense of skepticism. I have heard some tall tales in my time, but the one the lawyer told you takes the cake.

If the bra was evidence of a felony in a court of law, it would have been in police custody, not your laundry hamper. Also, once it had been through the dry cleaning process, any DNA would have been compromised.

Your boyfriend is not only a cheater, he's also trying to avoid buying the woman a replacement bra. Rather than making this right, you should be shedding the skin doctor.
 

Rick Archer's Note: My first reaction was to shake my head in wonder at this woman's amazing gullibility.  How stupid can you get? 

I originally saved this story so everyone could have a good laugh.  But when I looked at the story for a second time, my memory reminded me something very similar happened to me 34 years ago.  Back in those days I was Mr. Gullible.

I dated very little in high school and college.  I was the poorest kid in school at a rich kid's high school and everyone knew it.  My high school status was so low I decided it was easier to mind my own business.   I dated a little bit my Freshman year in College, but got my feelings hurt pretty bad when a girl I liked picked a rich guy over me.  To deal with the disappointment, I decided to try studying instead.  Plus I went to an all men's college at the time (Johns Hopkins in Baltimore, Maryland), which meant dating was pretty much an uphill struggle anyway.

So by the time I reached Graduate School, I was about as inexperienced as they come in my dealings with the Fair Sex.  It was just my luck that in Grad School I fell for a lady who turned out to be a two-timer.  Here I was full of trust and she told me some lies that were almost as ridiculous as that story above.  Despite my incredulity, I took her word for it which set me up for a painful fall down the line.  By the time I found out the truth, I got my feelings so badly hurt that it would be four years before I had the guts to try another serious relationship.

Isn't it a shame we always have to learn lessons like that the hard way?  No wonder people go around with their guard up all the time.

If you are curious about the gory details, read the story of Jan Thomas

From the Houston Chronicle

Nov. 27, 2007, 1:22PM
Teacher could be lashed over naming teddy bear Muhammad

By MOHAMED OSMAN
Associated Press

KHARTOUM, Sudan — Sudanese authorities today questioned a British teacher who could face charges of insulting religion — a crime punishable by up to 40 lashes — after she allowed her young students to name a teddy bear Muhammad in a class project.

Gillian Gibbons was arrested Sunday after one of her pupils' parents complained, accusing her of naming the bear after Islam's prophet and founder. Muhammad is a common name among Muslim men, but giving the prophet's name to an animal would be seen as insulting by many Muslims.

Gibbons was being questioned on suspicion of abuse of religion — a charge that is punishable by up to six months in prison, a fine or flogging of up to 40 lashes under Sudan's Islamic law-based legal system.

Several Sudanese newspapers ran a statement today reportedly from Unity High School in Khartoum where Gibbons taught, saying the administration "offers an official apology to the students and their families and all Muslims for what came from an individual initiative." It said Gibbons had been "removed from her work at the school."

In the first official comment on the case, the Sudanese Foreign Ministry today played down the significance of the case, calling it "isolated despite our condemnation and rejection of it."

Ministry spokesman Ali al-Sadeq said it was an incidence of a "teacher's misconduct against the Islamic faith" but noted the school's apology.

The statement from the school in newspapers called it a "misunderstanding." It underlined the school's "deep respect for the heavenly religions" and for the "beliefs of Muslims and their rituals," adding that "the misunderstanding that has been raised over this issue leads to divisions that are disadvantageous to the reputation of the tolerant Sudanese people."

The Arabic statement was not officially confirmed by the school. But a person reached by phone at the school who identified herself as an administrator said the statement was correct. She refused to give her name, citing the sensitivity of the situation.

She said the school has closed for at least the next week until the controversy eases. The Unity High School, a private English-language school with elementary to high school levels, was founded by Christian groups, but 90 percent of its students are Muslim, mostly from upper-class Sudanese families.

The school's director, Robert Boulos, told the British Broadcasting Corp. that the incident was "a completely innocent mistake. Miss Gibbons would have never wanted to insult Islam."

Gibbons, 54, was teaching her pupils, who are around age 7, about animals and asked one of them to bring in her teddy bear, Boulos said. She asked the students to pick names for it and they proposed Abdullah, Hassan and Muhammad, and in the end the pupils voted to name it Muhammad, he said.

Each child was allowed to take the bear home on weekends and write a diary about what they did with it. The diary entries were collected in a book with the bear's picture on the cover, labeled, "My Name is Muhammad," he said. The bear itself was never labeled with the name, he added.

A former colleague of Gibbons, Jill Langworthy, told The Associated Press the lesson is a common one in Britain.

"She's a wonderful and inspirational teacher, and if she offended or insulted anybody she'd be dreadfully sorry," said Langworthy, who taught with Gibbons in Liverpool.

There were widespread calls in Britain for Gibbons' release. The Muslim Council of Britain calls upon the Sudanese government to intervene.

"This is a very unfortunate incident and Ms. Gibbons should never have been arrested in the first place. It is obvious that no malice was intended," said Muhammad Abdul Bari, the council's secretary-general.

British opposition Conservative party lawmaker William Hague called on the British government to "make it clear to the Sudanese authorities that she should be released immediately."

"To condemn Gillian Gibbons to such brutal and barbaric punishment for what appears to be an innocent mistake is clearly unacceptable," he said.

Omar Daair, spokesman for the British Embassy in Sudan, said embassy officials were in touch with Sudanese authorities and had met with Gibbons. He said he expected authorities to decide whether to bring her to court, and on what charges, within a few days.

"Her lawyer is trying to get her released on bail in the meanwhile," he said.

The case recalled the outrage that was sparked in the Islamic world when European newspapers ran cartoons deriding the Prophet Muhammad, prompting sometimes violent protests in many Muslim countries. The prophet is highly revered by Muslims, and most interpretations of the religion bar even favorable depictions of him, for fear of encouraging idolatry or misrepresenting him.

Sudanese President Omar al-Bashir earlier this month suggested he would ban Denmark, Sweden and Norway — where newspapers ran the cartoons — from contributing engineering personnel to a planned U.N.-African Union peacekeeping force in the Sudanese region of Darfur.

Al-Bashir's government already has tense relations with the West, which has widely condemned his regime for alleged abuses in Darfur where more than 200,000 people have died in a conflict that began in early 2003.

 

Rick Archer's Note: These people are not kidding around about using the name "Mohammed".  In certain Islamic countries, they take this name seriously.  I had an odd brush with this phenomenon myself.  I have long been fascinated with Dubai, an Arab country on the Persian Gulf that reminds me of Las Vegas.  I can't tell you how amazing it is the way they conquered the harsh desert and turned it into a metropolis straight out of a science fiction novel.  You should definitely check out my story! 

The genius behind this preposterous gamble is a man named Sheik Mohammed.  By chance, I reprinted an article about Dubai that referred to Sheik Mohammed as "Sheik Mo".   For my mistake I received the following email:

-----Original Message-----
From: Shams Islam
Sent: Wednesday, October 10, 2007 3:10 PM
To: dance@ssqq.com
Subject: Sheikh Mo?

You have used Mo for Mohammed referring to Sheikh Mohammed in your Dubai article. It is very offensive to call some one Mo. Can you please make the necessary change.

Thanks, Shams

Rick Archer wrote:

After thinking about your request for a couple weeks, I have decided to follow your advice. Please check my work and comment if you see any further signs of disrespect.

It is certainly not my intention to be disrespectful to a man I admire.
 

-----Original Message-----
From: Shams Islam
Sent: Monday, October 22, 2007 1:33 PM
To: Rick Archer
Subject: RE: Sheikh Mo?

Hi Rick,

We are a global nation and thus should be aware of other cultures and religions.

Your actions makes you a global player.
Love your site.

I moved to US from Abu Dhabi in 80s and the change there is unimaginable.

Shams
Dallas

Although most Westerners consider the teddy bear incident ridiculous, I have to assume the teacher had at least an inkling of the trouble she was inviting by giving it the sacred name.  I certainly don't think lashing the woman is the correct response, but I hope she has the sense to apologize.  If someone is that touchy, I don't see the point in being disrespectful, especially when you are a guest in their country. 

Back when I was in college, I was outraged at the end of the movie Easy Rider when a hippie was assassinated for having the nerve to flash the bird at a couple of rednecks.  Later in life I realized the hippie was essentially committing suicide by antagonizing the rednecks.  I am not saying that it was right to kill the hippie.  I am saying that it would not have hurt the hippie to use a little common sense.  His actions amounted to a death wish.

(Rick Archer's Note: I came across the following story about Western Dancing here at SSQQ in the oddest of ways.  One day I googled my name and suddenly found my name on a web site for Cambridge University over in England!

Curious, I read the article and realized it had been written by Paul Bolchover, a dance student here at SSQQ.  I did not even realize that Paul was originally from the United Kingdom.  Paul is a quiet, rather reserved gentleman who first visited SSQQ back in April 2006.  During his brief stay here in Houston, he has taken 30 dance classes at SSQQ. 

I have always admired his ability to pick up dance patterns faster than any other man in his class. However whenever I compliment Paul, he is always so modest that I don't know what to say next.  Paul keeps such a low profile, I bet very few people know who he is.  I researched my files for a picture, but came up empty.  The next time I see him, I am going to get his picture.

Amused to find my name in his article, I decided to google Paul's name.  Turnabout is fair play.  Lo and behold I discovered that Paul holds a 2001 PhD from Cambridge University!  His dissertation was "Dynamic Effects of Cooling of Geological Flows".  In addition, I discovered he is not only a member of the Mathematical GenealogyProject and The Archimedeans, but also the Cambridge Assassination's Guild.  You need to read this:

Another death was reported from Trinity College, where the notorious killer Paul Bolchover took the life of David Walker, both of Trinity College. It is understood that Bolchover's attack was a carefully-planned set-up, in which the late Mr. Walker was persuaded to give some pens to his would-be assassin to avoid losing them in a post-exam celebration at the local hostelry. When Walker returned to collect the pens, Bolchover shot him in the small of the  back - taking his victim completely unawares. Police are playing down rumours that David Walker had a drink problem which may have led to unawareness of a dangerous situation.

No wonder we don't have a picture of Paul!  He must be using SSQQ as a safe haven while he hides from the law back in England.  At first glance, Paul seems utterly gentle and harmless, but I always suspected he might be a truly dangerous man!

Beware!  There could be an assassin in our midst.  Feeling rather intimidated, I have decided to be extremely nice to Paul whenever I see him in dance class from now on.  Nor do I intend to let him know I am on to his secret! 

And now let us read Paul's article about SSQQ and Western Dancing.  Perhaps it will give us clues into how an assassin truly thinks.  By the way, when I went back to the original site of the article, I found a picture!   Ta Da!

A Letter from America: An insight into the Texas Twostep By Paul Bolchover January 2007 Reprinted from the Cambridge Dancers Club Newsletter It had to happen: after 14 years in Cambridge, and 13 years as a member of the CDC (Cambridge Dance Club), work finally decided that it was time for me to move to Houston.  No one that knows me will be surprised that one of the first things I did was to check on the quality of the dancing out there, and it was with great difficulty that I dragged myself from the familiar comforts of Cambridge to the wilds of Texas. Houston was fairly small until the oil boom of the 1970s.  Nowadays, it is a huge urban sprawl.  There are no planning restrictions, which means that new suburbs are continually being built on the edge of the city, while older housing inside the city falls into neglect or is redeveloped.

Houses are built out of timber, and the hot humid weather means that buildings only last for 30-40 years.  Despite the very cosmopolitan urban nature of Houston itself, you don't need to go far beyond the city limits to reach the wilds of Texas: small towns, with traditional values.  The oil industry has brought both fat cats and rednecks from around the states, bringing their own hometown traditions.  It came as a surprise to find that cowboy hats and boots really are considered to be part of normal clothing: it is not unusual to see several people wearing Stetson hats in the queue for passport control at the airport or out shopping.  People of both sexes wear a hat to dance classes, making underarm turns much more interesting!

Perhaps it's the traditional attitude of the people, but dancing is still very popular with all ages in Houston.  In particular, the "Texas Twostep" and "Polka", which are the traditional dances of Texas and most of the mid-west states.  While in the UK the freedom of the late sixties led people to reject partner dancing and to start dancing by themselves on the dance floor, the same does not appear to have happened in Texas:  Partner Dancing is very much a part of their culture, and people of my age will have picked up the Twostep and Polka at local honky-tonks while in their young teens.

Once I arrived at Houston, it was fairly easy to find somewhere to dance.  A metropolitan population of five million (forty times that of Cambridge) means a correspondingly larger number of dance clubs, in nearly every style imaginable.  I get my ballroom fix once a month, where the local ballroom dancing federation puts on an event that is best described as a cross between General Dancing, a CDC Ball and Ballroom Blitz. 

Early on, I decided not to take up ballroom lessons, but to try some new forms of dancing.  I certainly fell on my feet when I joined the SSQQ Dance Club: a club that is so like the CDC that the similarities are amazing.  SSQQ claims to be the largest dance club in North America, with around 1000 people attending classes each month.  Courses are 8 hours long, consisting of 2-hours classes for 4 weeks.  They teach several classes each evening, in several different styles of dancing: Twostep / Polka, West Coast Swing, Salsa, Ballroom (American style), East Coast Swing (a cross between Lindyhop, Jive, Rock'n'Roll and Ceroc), and various other miscellaneous styles. 

There is even a Glennis-like figure: the studio owner, Rick Archer, whose presence is felt over the entire club.  One advantage SSQQ has over the CDC is that they can teach all of their classes in a single venue.  This means that at the end of each evening, all of the classes merge, forming a big hour-long Practice Night for everyone.  The club has monthly dance parties corresponding to CDC balls, but there is nothing corresponding to General Dancing.  Instead, serious dancers go out to one of the many C&W clubs in town (think a Salsa club, but with cowboys).  A particular favourite is called "Wild West", which combined a saloon atmosphere with women in chaps at the bar a wooden dance floor, and dancing every evening until late.

Not long after arriving, I began to learn the Texas Twostep.  This dance (not to be confused with the "Nightclub Twostep") is best described as doing the armwork of Ceroc (or Salsa), while dancing the footwork of the Quickstep.  It progresses round the room: the basic step is in a fairly open dance hold, with the man facing line of dance starting on the left foot, going QQSS (forward close forward forward) with the woman doing the same in reverse.  Some people dance the second step as a forward, rather than a close.  This Twostep basic is essentially the same as the Quickstep, except with the man doing chasses forward, instead of sideways.  The Country & Western Polka is exactly the same, but with man starting on the left foot, going QQS QQS (forward close forward, forward close forward).

The Twostep can be danced to most slow to medium Country & Western music and the Polka to slow Country & Western cha chas danced at double speed or to fast Polka-like tunes.  Neither dance has a heel lead: the Twostep is fairly flat-footed, while the Polka seems to mainly be danced on the toes, though without the hop of the European Polka.

In general, steps taught in the Twostep can also be taught in the Polka:

They simply stretch the move on the final slow to last over the three steps of the second QQS.  In fact, in higher level classes, they only teach the routine in the Twostep, and leave it to the dancer to work out a Polka version.

The simplest steps that can be added are the turns from dancing forwards to dancing backwards: dancing forwards, the man starts swinging himself to the side on the final slow of the basic, does a half turn on the next QQS (which normally goes side close back) and goes backwards on the final Slow.  To turn from backwards to forwards, the man steps (back back side) on the QQS, and spins half a turn on the next slow (very similar to a Spin Turn).  The turns work identically in Polka.

Until around 1980, that was it!  There were a couple of advanced steps: the "Circle Turn", which is just going forward to backwards repeatedly and the "Reverse Circle Turn", which is the same but in the opposite direction (crossing your feet like in Viennese Waltz). 

In 1979, Travolta starred in the film "Urban Cowboy": a similar film to “Saturday Night Fever”, but with country music and Travolta dancing the Twostep.  The film was very popular (especially in Houston, where it was filmed), and suddenly all of the nightclubs stopped playing disco music, and started playing Country Music instead.  The youth of the day had previously been dancing to disco music with a partner dance referred to as the Aggie Jitterbug which was nearly identical to Ceroc - lots of arm movements, no footwork ("Aggie" is probably meant as an insult, since it refers to the Texas A&M university - a great rival to the University of Texas in Houston). 

These dancers suddenly found themselves restricted to Twostep music, dancing a dance with very little variety.  As a result they experimented, trying to fit stationary Jitterbug moves into the progressive Twostep rhythm.  Some worked, some didn't.  There was also a lot of influence from ballroom teachers who, on seeing a new trend, started holding classes and adapting US-style Foxtrot moves to fit.  No matter how complicated the steps get, the rhythm of the dances never change.  Unlike International Ballroom, where interest is added by fancy footwork and timing, in these dances, interest is added by underarm turns of your partner etc, while the timing remains constant.  A lot of beginning Twostep moves involve the "double turn" for the woman (actually a 1 1/2 three-step turn for the woman to the left, under the man's arm).  In this way, the modern Twostep (sometimes called the Western Swing) was born.

Back in the old days, I used to publish one Picture Joke each month.  However during 2007, I have been neglecting my Joke Page.  Since December is the last month of the year, I guess I have some catching up to do.  I have decided to list the winners for the entire year.

December 2007 - Did He Do What it Looks Like He Did?
Contributed by Chris Holmes

November 2007 - Why Getting Married in a Church is Still Considered a Good Idea
Contributed by Milt Oglesby

October 2007 - Who Cares if She Can Type!
Contributed by Dakota Wilhelm

September 2007 - What's Wrong with this Picture?
Contributed by Jim Landureth

August 2007 - Three Contenders for the coveted "Man of the Year" Award
Contributed by Milt Oglesby

July 2007 - Why Men Always Want Bigger Boats
Contributed by Chris Holmes

June 2007 - Father of the Year
Contributed by Milt Oglesby and Carol Gafford

May 2007 - Contributed by Letty Dougherty
The Much-Deserved Destruction of a BMW

April 2007 - The Story of F u c k i n g, Austria.
Contributed by Carol Gafford and Gareld McEathron

March 2007 - The Hungry Deer
Contributed by Gareld McEathron

February 2007 - The Sex Maniac
Contributed by Carol Gafford

January 2007 - The Tequila Trojan Horse
Contributed by Rick Archer

These are some pretty funny pictures.  You should DEFINITELY check them out!  Picture Joke

The SSQQ web site is nine years old.  During this time, I have acquired about 600 jokes sent in by our readers.  When time permits, I list about 50 classic jokes from the past for your reading pleasure.  The December Jokes are ready!
Please visit our Joke Hall of Fame. 

And here is a New Joke to add to our collection.  It was sent in by Milt Oglesby.  In case you don't like his joke, I have decided to publish his picture so you can give him a hard time the next time you see him at the studio.  By the way, Milt wears that same shirt to every Halloween Party.  As you can see, his shirt makes women faint. Maybe I need to start paying him for his jokes so Milt can buy a new shirt for next year's party.   December 2007 Joke of the Month - The Pussycat Contributed by Milt Oglesby
My husband and I live in a small town.  One December day we found an old straggly cat sleeping on our doorstep.  For a second I worried she might be dead, but the cat moved when I approached.  She was such a sorry sight.  The cat was skinny and starving, dirty, she smelled terrible, and her hair was all matted down.  I felt sorry for her and even my hard-hearted husband showed some sympathy. So I got him to put her in a carrier and we took her to the vet.  We didn't know what to call her so we named her "Pussycat." The vet decided to keep Pussycat for a day or so. He said he would let us know when we could pick her up. Just as we were about to leave, my husband (always the complainer) opened his big mouth and said, "OK, but don't forget to wash her. That cat smells like a garbage dump."  He proceeded to remind the vet that it was his WIFE (me) that wanted to keep the dirty cat, not him. My husband and my Vet don't see eye to eye. The vet calls my husband 'El-Cheap-O', and my husband and calls the vet 'El-Charge-O'. The men constantly bicker and trade insults.  They begin to snipe at one another from the moment they first see each other.  Today my husband got in the last word, but I knew it would not take the vet long to seek revenge. How well I know both men.  The counterattack began the next morning.  My husband had an appointment with his doctor, who by chance is located in the same building as the vet.  In fact, their offices are adjoining.  On this day, the MD's reception room was full of people waiting to see the doctor.   As the story was told to me, my husband had just sat down when a side door opened and the vet leaned into the room.  The Vet had obviously seen my husband arrive.  Everyone looked up to see what was going on.
The Vet looked straight at my husband and said in a loud voice, "Mr. Nelson, I followed your orders and your wife's pussy doesn't stink any more.  We washed it and shaved it, and now the pussy smells like a rose.  Oh, and, by the way, I think she's pregnant.  She must have been out on the prowl.  God only knows who the father is!"  Then he closed the door. Now THAT, my friends, is how to get even in a small town!

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